While (MY) Mama was in the bathroom Episode #6

You know how I do this “While Mama was in The Bathroom” series? Well, I do. And previous episodes in the series can be read here.


I’m answering emails. My mom is over to watch the boys so I can catch up on work. My mom has magical powers to make kids fall asleep. Kids play nice when she is around. She even manages to leave my house cleaner than when she got here all the while watching the kids.

I have no idea how she does it. Must be magic grandma powers.

I hear her say, “I’ll be right back boys, I have to go to the bathroom.”

Suddenly I hear SCREAMING! And CRYING!

I expect blood or broken bones.

I rush into the room at the same time my mom does.


No blood or bone shards so my mom and I look at each other over their cries and communicate via telepathy.

What are they crying about? I have no idea! What happened? No idea!

Neither one of us know what happened and the boys are too upset to explain anything.

I was in another room working and my mom stepped out of the room for 30 seconds to pee.

And then my mom says:



Apparently grandma magic doesn’t include the ability to pee with out chaos.

So glad she gets it.



Warning: I’m going to beg and get honest and then become hopeful.

Begging: Yeah, I know this post is short and not very good. I’m so busy with book promotions stuff that I haven’t had any time to write a proper post. You know what would help get things back to normal on this blog? If you guys, my faithful readers who regularly enjoy this blog, bought my book. Then I wouldn’t have to be so busy trying to get other people (who don’t read this blog) to buy it. I know 1% of you already bought it, which I am forever grateful. But those 99% of you who read and enjoy this blog and haven’t yet bought the book, pretty please consider supporting this blog by buying a copy today.ย 

Honesty: I’ve started getting a lot of emails, congratulating me about having “made it” and people assuming I’m making truckloads of money. Even a few crappy emails in the bunch. Writing this blog and the book over the last year has been a huge, huge amount of work. And contrary to popular belief I still haven’t gotten rich from it. I always have a couple lovely sponsors on the sidebar and after paying my hosting costs, I managed to pull a profit in 2012. I made $131. For an entire year’s worth of work. That was the total. Sure, I could have made more if I plastered ads all over the site or if I said yes to any one of the lame sponsored posts I was offered. But I didn’t want to do that to my readers. (You see how nice I am?)

Hope: So will you buy it? And help keep this crappy ship sailing? Please? Buy a copy at any of these places:

Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble, Books A Million,ย IndieBound, Walmart, Indigo, Kobo, iBookstore & more.


Thank you from the bottom of my crappy heart.

PS – This is the last time I’m going to beg you to buy the book.

PPS – Bookplates! The address labels were printed today and the bookplates will be in the mail next week to those of you who pre-ordered and filled out the form. Thank you again!








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388 Responses to While (MY) Mama was in the bathroom Episode #6

  1. Emma says:

    What! No comments yet? You must have just posted. (I admit, I haven’t even read the post yet, but I saw the 0 comments thing & figured I try for #1!!

  2. Jill says:

    Grandmas do have magical powers, that is so true. lol @ the not being able to pee still though.

    I’m in the 1% that bought your book! I can’t imagine not doing it. For all the free laughs you’ve given me over the last year shelling out $12 bucks was no biggie at all.

    • Terri says:

      FINALLY I’m in the 1% of something!! ๐Ÿ˜‰

      So far your book is every bit as hilarious as I expected it to be. My husband and I are taking turns hiding out in the bathroom to read it. I felt a ridiculously strong bond with you when I read the part about how you hoped we’d be in the bathroom reading about you being in the bathroom. We’re besties now, right??

      • Elena says:

        Yay, me too, me too! 1%!

      • Alison says:

        My plan was to buy it this weekend when I can finally get to a real store. I should have just order it on amazon but I debated the kindle version vs the real life version too long and now I’m impatient.

      • Sheryl says:

        Me too! 1% and a bathroom reader!!

        • Meggin D says:

          Me too! ๐Ÿ™‚
          Amazon was even nice enough to ship it to my work address. Come on people! Support Amber! She’s sooo worth it!

          • Allison says:

            I bought the book this weekend at B&N (and I was happy to pay the full $19.95 price) am half way through and loving it! I’d also like to note that I work in publishing and am not at all surprised to hear about that whopping profit of $131. Everyone out there should support those authors whose work we really love so that they can keep writing it for us!!

    • Sarah says:

      $19.95 in Canada…but I still bought it, and honestly read most of it while in my car in the bookstore parking lot, because hubby was home with the baby and I had…QUIET!

      • Michele says:

        I read most of it in the car, too. Aah, quiet time.

      • Gracie says:

        $30 to get it shipped to Tasmania right down the bottom of Australia but i spent it anyway…! well worth it! although it takes 4-6 weeks to get here.. ๐Ÿ™

  3. Joanne says:

    I just need to find it in a store where I live and then I’ll buy it. If I can’t, then I’ll break down and order it online

    • Taylor says:

      I couldn’t find it in any local stores, but we’re in a small town, no chain bookstores except walmart. Walmart.com has it, but not in my store. We did order it today, though, on walmart.com, It’s under $11 there!! And free shipping with site-to-store. Only 8 reviews there, though. I’ll leave a review, too!

      • Joanne says:

        Just bought it at Chapters. Loving it so far. May have even gotten a few other people to buy it as well

        • Steff Boys says:

          I’m in Australia and my local bookshop recons they can’t get it in. I’m going to have to try the online way. I will get there honest Amber!

          • JoKateG says:

            Bookworld.com.au (the old Borders) has it in Australia. It’s $22 for hard cover and paperback coming soon, you can preorder. Free shipping!

          • Elizabeth says:

            Thanks JoKateG! Just bought it – although the crappy Bookworld interface only will let me buy one copy at a time! Boo! I bought one for my best friend’s birthday next week (mother of three boys) and then I’ll get one for myself later. Just wish I could have been in for the signed bookplate thingo – that sounded cool, but I heard it wasn’t available outside the USA anyway.

  4. Heather says:

    I already bought it, and I thought this post was great! It made me laugh anyways. And not the fake lol, I actually loled ๐Ÿ™‚

    The book rocks!

  5. sarah says:

    Oh god, my mom knows that to be the truth with my three littles.

    Everyone should buy the book! Everyone! Buy it or else! LOL

  6. Jen says:

    My birthday is in 2 weeks and the book is #1 on my wish list!

  7. Nora says:

    Love, love, love the book! I am laughing out loud as I read through the pages! Going to order copies for my other Mommy friends!

    • Taylor says:

      I want to order copies for my mama friends (if I had the $), but wouldn’t that be weird? We don’t ever exchange gifts.

  8. Jimin says:

    Your blog is awesome! I’m buying your book for as gifts to all my mom friends.

    • Jimin says:

      Oh, and I read your book in 1 day. It was hilarious. My kids saw it and want me to read it to them. But of course, they don’t get it. LOL!

      • annie says:

        My kids want to read it too! They must think it’s a kid book since the drawings look kind of like drawings they do, lol! When I got it in the mail, I posted a pic of it on FB to make all my friends who haven’t ordered it yet go order it. $12? What a deal!!! Love it. I keep going back to it when I’m drinking my 5 o’clock glass of wine and about to start crying (so I laugh instead).

      • Brittany says:

        I too read the book in one day. Almost wet my pants during the pizza delivery part – but I am a mommy so the bladder thing might not count.

        The book is awesome! Had to fight my hubby to read it first.

        • Jenny says:

          The pizza delivery part as my favorite too. I almost fell out of bed, I was laughing so hard!

  9. diane says:

    I was FANCY and bought the Kindle edition. Since I read it on my iPad, it was just as vibrant as the paper book would have been! And, I laughed. A lot. I sincerely like the idea of buying it for a baby shower, and I have at least one coming up soon!

  10. Crissyissy says:

    I’m sold! Where can I buy it? I only ever read the blog from my phone and its hard to read this small print!!

  11. dee says:


  12. RachMum says:

    You sold me, finally. I don’t know why I’ve been holding off on buying it and I truly intended to. Plus, knowing you from way back in the old days of woodmouse I’m scared you’ll quit!! (is woodmouse ever coming back? still holding out hope) ๐Ÿ˜‰

    • Laura says:

      Hold the phone! Amber was WOODMOUSE? I had no idea! Oh shit, lady, you better not quit crappy on us! I have a babywearing mama figure you made in my windowsill, I had no idea you were the same person. My awe of you just expanded tenfold.

  13. Kbee says:

    Happy to support your efforts. $12 was the least I could do (well, short of absolutely nothing). No regrets– the book is hysterical! And beefy. I mean, really just fun to hold. Even while hiding in the bathroom. Did I mention beefy?

  14. Allison F. says:

    I bought it in hard copy, and for the Kindle! Well, I actually forgot that I bought the hard copy when I ordered it for my Kindle, so it wasn’t intentional. I’ll blame my son for frying my brain for that one. I am sure I will find someone to share the extra copy with! ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Elizabeth says:

      I’m getting a hard copy to loan out – I never loan paperbacks anymore, they get trashed.

  15. Shawna Bellant says:

    I picked up my copy on Monday and had it read within an hour ๐Ÿ˜‰ my kids destroyed the house but well worth it!

    • Emma says:

      Ha ha. This comment made me laugh. My kids would destroy the house too if I read a full book but it sounds so tempting!

  16. Tara says:

    The book is insanely cheap for how awesome it is people!! Love love love it!! It sits next to my bed stand for me to get a smile before getting to bed! ๐Ÿ™‚ hopefully I can convince my husband to let me buy a copy to keep a work too!!

    Thank you so much for the smiles and laughter! ๐Ÿ™‚

  17. Lisa Lutes says:

    I usually just borrow bloggers books from the library (I know, terrible), but I’m going to buy yours because I know it will be awesome and worth re-reading. I know how hard it is, I’ve been food blogging and writing a companion cookbook for 2 1/2 years and I don’t even have sponsors or a book deal, just about 150 very loyal followers. I hope you’re a bestseller, I’m sure you will be!

  18. Tomomi Shimomura says:

    I bought the book last week and loved it!! Wish I had preordered though, I could have gotten the book plates. ๐Ÿ™‚
    Keep up the funnies.

  19. Anita says:

    Ok I’m going to buy the book. Keep promoting and talking about it. Every published blogger I read promotes their book shamelessly. Don’t stop until everyone has read it. Promote. Sell. Work it baby !

  20. Michelle says:

    When your book is here in the UK, I am buying that bad boy!

    • Peta says:

      ? I got mine in Glasgow last week! You’re not looking hard enough!

      • Claire H says:

        I got mine from amazon.co.uk! It only just arrived last week, and I read it in less than an hour too! I’ve bought 2 more copies for friends I think/hope will like it.

        I wonder what people who have never read the blog will think of the book? I’m fairly sure neither of my friends follow the blog, but I’m really hoping they will both love the book. Both have just had their 2nd child, and I really think it’s a perfect 2nd-or-more baby present. Or at least for someone whose first is at least a toddler. It’s more hilarious if you’ve already experienced the stuff Amber writes about.

        • Elizabeth says:

          Amber’s stuff rocks – doesn’t matter if you’re reading it for the the first time! I was hooked from the very first link – can’t remember who sent it to me. It appears regularly in my FB feed linked from my mummy friends.

  21. Michelle says:

    I’m in the 1% ๐Ÿ™‚ Can’t wait for it to arrive!

  22. hope says:

    Short, but so funny. Magical grandma powers do not extend to peaceful potty breaks!
    I have not purchased the book. I’m waiting until I don’t have 5 billion birthdays to buy for. And baby showers. It is in my cart waiting, though.

  23. Rachel says:

    Buying it now! Thanks for the reminder! Reading your blog is a family affair here at our house, you’ve provided us with many hours of laughter and fun memories!

  24. Jess says:

    I bought 2!! And have been anxiously stalking the postman ever since.

  25. Trista says:

    Its a little different over here in my neck of the woods! I can pee, in private about 80% of the time. But when my mother is around, she cant pee without followers, or fingers under the door. My kids treat my like I am invisible when my mom is around though! hahaha

  26. Elizabeth Beckman says:

    ah, $131. this is similar to the annual profits of my handmade soapmaking business. i’m off to buy a copy of ye olde crappy book! and i’m still grateful to the wooden toy making video on Make Baby Stuff.com…thank you! those little birds made lots of ppl happy last xmas, children AND adults…

  27. Sarah says:

    I will go buy your book now, I keep meaning to and then get distracted… but I love you, I love your blog! Even if I feel like you must have cameras in my house o.O

  28. Emma says:

    What?! Only 1%. I bought three copies to give two away as gifts! How has everyone not bought this yet?! Maybe you’ve gone for a terrible market segment – mummies don’t have time to buy or read things! Perhaps you should start writing about something for people who have more time to do the things they mean to do!

    Obviously, I’m kidding. Don’t ever leave us! xx

    • AmberM says:

      OMG. Gifts. Never thought of that. I posted below that I asked for it for Mother’s Day but it just occurred to me that my bestie is having Baby #2 soon and that would be a great thing to add to my stuff for her.

      • Emma says:

        I might just buy 20 and have them in stock in my house to give away every time a friend has a baby! ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Erica says:

      This is by far the best baby shower gift ever. Cute little outfit PLUS the reality of this book. Perfect.

  29. Jenni says:

    I’ve just bought one, from Amazon Japan (I live in Tokyo). It’s not available here until mid-May, but I have reserved a copy! Looking forward to it arriving!

    • jen f says:

      Bought three books this week! Gifts for all my first time parent friends. Still need one for my own bookshelf.

    • April says:

      I live in Tokyo, too. Think of it as a Mother’s Day gift (apropos, no?). ๐Ÿ™‚

  30. Jamie says:

    I promise to buy it this weekend, its been on my list. ๐Ÿ™‚

  31. AmberM says:

    I asked for it for Mother’s Day. I think it’s fitting. ๐Ÿ™‚

  32. YES. I love you for this. For your honesty. For putting your readers before your profits. Love you. Times God. Which is a LOT more than $131. But love won’t pay the bills. (Stupid love.) No doubt your readers have gotten more than $17 worth of pleasure from your blog. I know I have. BUYING.

    • Courtney says:

      OMG I love being in the 1%! I even keep my copy in the bathroom to trick other people into reading it. Seriously though everybody should buy the book, it’s funny and Amber deserves to be rich for wiring it. Or at the very least compensated for her time and talent.

  33. colleen says:

    I bought it and already read it! I even posted a link on my facebook page about how you are pee in your pants laughing so hard funny and they would not be sorry if they bought it. Then I posted your pic of Adam levine holding your book because if his royal hotness cant sell you a million copies I don’t know what will… ๐Ÿ˜‰

  34. Jenny says:

    I bought it, and laughed til I cried. Multiple times. I have told everyone at work about it. I’m trying to help :). By the way, I’ve been reading your older blogs and really enjoying those too! You are so crafty and creative!

  35. Ann Pizzi says:

    Love your blog and bought the book. You are me, with way better drawing abilities. Your stick people crush my stick people. And let’s not even talk about the rest of the stuff. Yay you!!!

  36. mary anne says:

    i bought ur book! it just came in the mail. im excited to read it tonight.

  37. Imogen says:

    I brought it and I’ve only just found your blog ๐Ÿ™‚ Now I just have the painful wait for international freight to get it to me in New Zealand.

  38. Samantha Moore-Schwermann says:

    I keep dropping the hint to my husband that I want your book. I keep hoping that he is going to buy it for me as a nice surprise. I should really get over that fantasy. *sigh.

    • Karen (Scotland) says:

      Yeah, I tried that too. “Look at this blog! It’s SO, So funny! She just brought out a book…?”
      Nope, nada.
      Just ordered it myself off amazon.co.uk after this post.

  39. Lena says:

    My friend bought your book for me and I loved it!! It was hilarious!! I might buy some more copies for Christmas gifts for everybody who has kids, wants kids, or works with kids.

  40. Hayley Vince says:

    That is SO true! As SOON as you go to the toilet, or even run to get dressed, chaos just happens that second!!! Love your blog, I’m a new one of your readers, but I’m about to buy your book!!!

  41. Sara says:

    You had me at $131….

    Seriously, I feel like I owe it to you to buy your book just so that I can go on reading your posts & laughing. I might even feel guilty enough to buy a copy for the shower that I’m hosting next week!

    • Sara says:

      I just ordered two…
      I may or may not have paid with my children’s gift cards from Christmas….

  42. natasha says:

    I can’t wait for it to be available here in the UK!!

  43. Avery says:

    I bought a copy and left it in the lactation room at my work. You have a new set of fans and appreciative mamas for entertaining us during our food extraction breaks!

  44. Cayla Olague says:

    No need to beg already bought :))

  45. Kari says:

    My Mom has the same magic powers. Maybe some day when we are grandmas it will be the same?

  46. Liz says:


    I just tried to buy it from the iBookstore, but it’s not available in the Australian store and my account won’t work in the US store…. Is that something you can change or shall I just buy a paper copy? PS I’m still loving you so much, but still not in a weird way, I’m still not going to watch you in the shower and sniff your undies while you’re out!

    • Erica says:

      I bought it from Booktopia, hard copy though.

    • Michelle says:

      I am from Aussie too ๐Ÿ™‚ I was disappointed to see it wasn’t on the Australian Apple Store so I bought it from Book Depositry. Also bought one for a friend, it’s been shipped so should arrive soon!

  47. Beth says:

    I saw it on Kobo I plan to buy… need to gather some more coin on Paypal though I just spilled a whole bag on a woven wrap. :)) can’t wait for more laughs!!

    Do you also babywear I have yet to see a funny babywearing post ๐Ÿ˜›

  48. Jessica says:

    I just bought it on Amazon. I’ve been putting it off because I thought sooooo many people had already bought it and I would wait to check it out from the library. Thanks for making me laugh all the time!

  49. Sara B says:

    I’ve been a loyal follower of your blog since pretty much the beginning– and I also bought your book! And preordered, so I’m excited to get the bookplate, too! Just got an email that my local bookstore received the book (they ordered it, so I was able to support a local shop, too, double bonus!).

    Hope you sell lots and lots of books, and can’t wait to pick up my copy tomorrow!
    Thanks for the laughs!

  50. Ashley S says:

    I was just in the bathroom, alone for the first time today, and was thinking how it was the best part if my day! Then the crying started and my moment was lost. ๐Ÿ˜› I love your blog and your book! I took your advice from a previous post and bought copies for myself, sis and mom for mother’s day. Your book keeps me company during those rare bathroom trips that don’t end in disaster! ๐Ÿ˜€

  51. Rebecca says:

    I bought your book and loved it!!! The only problem was that I was reading some parts at 3 AM when I couldn’t sleep…..and I woke my husband up because I was shaking the bed, trying to control my laughter. ๐Ÿ™‚
    Thank you for that. I always like to dole out a little payback for all those newborn nights when he slept soundly while I tended to the baby.

  52. Beth says:

    PS I have been considering becoming one of your ad sponsors, but I’m always hesitant because I’m not sure how I fit in your theme!! But I love your site!!

  53. Ashlee says:

    I bought the book!!! … pre-ordered it from America (I’m in Australia) and it arrived yesterday! Read it straightaway and couldn’t stop laughing!

  54. Karen says:

    Holy shit, Amber, $131? That just can’t happen! You’re my favorite blog ever, the only one I religiously follow! How can you not be rolling in the dough, you deserve it!

    I appreciate and admire your choice not to use an ad network. See, this is what makes you so awesome.

    I bought a copy already but I just bought another one to give to my girlfriend who just had a baby. XOXO

  55. Micki says:

    $131! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry! But congratulations on not owing any money on your work! I have given away my copy, replaced it, given that one away and am in the process of getting another! I believe in you! And so will everyone I know sooner rather than later. You go girl! Thanks for the laughs on a regular basis.

  56. Sharon says:

    I got your book last week at B&N. I usually don’t leave the house unless it’s to see a doc but I made a special trip for your book. Yup, me, crappy leg, crappy cane and all! I read it twice the day I got it. I adore it. I’m buying 4 more copies. One for each of my sisters (one of which is going through chemo and demanded something to make her laugh) and one for my best friend. There will be more…this is now my go-to baby shower/birthday/just because gift. Best crappy purchase ever.

  57. Laurel says:

    I bought your book last week for my husband’s birthday. We both love your blog bc it’s so honestly funny about the humiliating and frustrating parts of parenting – the parts that only other parents understand.

    Well, my 7 year old read the book all the way home – to the point of carsickness when I then asked him to put it down. When we got home my 12 & 9 year olds couldn’t put it down – constantly giggling to themselves.

    Thank you for an afternoon of fun entertainment!

  58. katie says:

    I love your blog too much to not buy the book. I am being wishful and waiting until I make it to 1,000 likes on my blog’s facebook page, then I’m buying a copy for myself and one for a giveaway. I always tell people about your book and blog. I hope you get lots of sales.

  59. Andrea says:

    I read the blog all the time and I’ve never before commented, but wanted to let you know I bought and enjoyed the (kindle version) book. Good stuff, just wish it was longer!

  60. Colette says:

    Told hubby I want two things for Mother’s Day
    1) A weekend without me having to do the laundry (and it isn’t allowed to be just left there waiting for me to do it on another day)
    2) Your book !!!

  61. Sarah says:

    Is it available in Canada or just the USA? Would love to buy but don’t want to pay crazy shipping. Can’t wait to read it though

  62. Bethany says:

    I’ve asked for your book for Mother’s Day, whether my husband actually remembers and gets it for me is another story ๐Ÿ˜‰ If he doesn’t come through I’ll just break down and download it.

  63. Elise says:

    So my daughter Mikaela just had her second birthday, and received a Barns and Noble gift card, which I am pretty sure she wants me to spend on your book. How could I be a bad mommy and say no? ๐Ÿ™‚ Headed to the bookstore tomorrow!

  64. Benny says:

    Ok, I’m normally only the lurkiest of lurkers..
    but this post struck a chord.

    I’ve pinned and Facebooked a huge blurb about this and within about three minutes, I’ve had FOUR posts asking where peeps can actually find this AMAZING sounding/looking book.. to which I answered promptly.

    Amber, you’ve brightened countless dark moments.. and lit many dark corners of parenting. What I’m trying to say here is that you’re one of the shining stars of my “stolen two minutes of mom time” world. You deserve success and fame and a sash with tiara for your achievements, not just some kind words here (although those are nice sometimes too).

    Thank you for making something that will surely be the baby-shower gift of the year.. I know that at least four people will be receiving your tome (that’s right) because of what you’ve written today.
    Thank you for just being so freaking awesome.

  65. Ink says:

    Your book is great and I wish you the best to make even more profit in 2013! xoxo

  66. Elisa says:

    Your book is number 1 on my Mother’s Day wish list. Okay there is no list. I just told my husband “I want the Parenting Illustrated with Crappy Pictures book! Get it or I’ll totally be annoyed!”

  67. Kristen says:

    I just bought the Kindle edition! Can’t wait to read it!

  68. Susanne says:

    i bought it and it should be here monday ๐Ÿ™‚

  69. Fabialous says:

    i just got two Books! One for myself and one as a thank you for my last client ;).
    I truly enjoy your blog. thank you.

  70. Madeleine says:

    Just bought it! I am now thinking my new-mum friend needs one too…

  71. Leah says:

    Can’t wait for my tax return to arrive, so I have some extra cash to spend on the book! Love the blog!

  72. Tracey says:

    I didn’t personally buy it, but I’ve shown my husband enough of the posts for him to buy it and put it in my Easter basket. It’s the perfect bathroom book!

  73. Rachel Blackett says:

    I would buy your book right now if I had the money ๐Ÿ˜€ (I am currently sitting at -$50 in my allowance, and only being able to pay $8 a week off it sucks (And thats not including the -$1500 I still have to pay off my laptop) With postage probably being $15 at least to get the book here (And I haven’t even worked out it would cost me to actually buy the book yet) its a no can do situation ๐Ÿ™

    PS Grandmas DO have magical powers!

  74. Peta says:

    I can’t believe only 1% of us have bought it. I’m delighted to be able to give something back for all the laughs you’ve given me. And in giving something back I just get more laughs!!

  75. yogamama says:

    Thank you for bringing me so many laughs and sharing your crappy life, I LOVE your blog and will buy your book. Promise! Will buy for my friends too. A must have for all my friends who are crappy parents ๐Ÿ™‚ All your hard and honesty is greatly appreciated.

  76. christa says:

    Its been in my amazon cart since you first mentioned it….I just hit buy. I will day dream about the day I can read it in the bathroom (well not really – since I don’t like spending that much time in there but more than 30 seconds might be nice).

  77. Danielle H. says:

    Done! Just bought your book for my Kobo. You are such a lovely person, and I am pleased to be able to help your sales ๐Ÿ™‚

  78. Jackie says:

    I shall buy your fabulously crappy book!! Mostly because you are the only one who makes me pee from laughter regularly (completely unrelated to previous childbirths!!). Cheers & many wishes for prosperity & perpetuation of your blog.

  79. Joanna says:

    OK, I was in the 99% of occasional blog readers that hadn’t bought your book. I have now – Kindle edition. My kids are 6 and 7 and I still can’t pee in peace. I brought them into work one day that school was out and the eldest found a random stranger in the hall to track me down in the bathroom. Because the world ended. Wait, not, because he put my cell phone down and the screen locked and couldn’t wait for me to come back to unlock it. When we got back to my office (he was waiting outside the bathroom door) we found his little sister crying because he’d left her alone. Sheesh!

  80. Tina says:

    I can totally respect a woman who aint to proud to beg. I’ll buy the book tonight. Promise.

  81. Denise P says:

    Just bought two copies! Sorry! I kept meaning to order one and…well, I was too busy trying to keep my toddler from “exploring” the wonders of the bathroom as she has been doing lately.

  82. Dodie says:

    I stumbled onto your site and bought the book in the same day:) Good stuff!

  83. Elena says:

    If I buy one as a gift, in addition to the one I got for me, does it help?

    • Erin says:

      Of course it will, Im buying one for a girlfriend of mine who just had a baby, she’ll love it.

  84. Michelle says:

    Bought your book! Just waiting for it to get to Sydney. I can’t wait to give copies to friends when they have babies too ๐Ÿ™‚

  85. Jessica says:

    Your begging worked. I was going to wait to buy a hard copy in store, but I just bought it for my Kobo. Just for you. Because I love you.

  86. Sarah says:

    I am half way through the book, actually I had just stopped at the sickness chapter and set it on my nightstand. At 2:30 am my 2 year old threw up all over his bed…I’m blaming that on you LOL. Then the next 2 nights he was fine until the nighttime came and he was throwing up again, of course. And grandma powers are real, we had been trying to get our 2 year old to wear his new glasses for a week, constant battle, threw them off, big crocodile tears. Then one day with grandma and he wears them all day, no fuss. Whatever! Love your blog and the book ๐Ÿ™‚

  87. Julie says:

    Bought (and loved) my copy. I’m a faithful follower, even though I rarely comment!

  88. Kim says:

    Hi there! I just wanted you to know that I bought my book! And already read it through. You are so funny. I have an 8 month right now and see what i’ve got to look forward to.

    Just writing to let you know that I ordered it from a local bookstore here in Napa, CA. And when I asked if they had it, the gentleman asked how I knew about the book and explained about your blog. He then said that he was going to order extras for his bookstore. It really appealed to him. So *HI FIVE* Good luck on promoting your book and blog!

  89. Belle says:

    I cant find the book in Australian stores yet but it hasnt stopped me, I ordered some online for baby shower gifts! Hopefully next pay I can get one for myself too ๐Ÿ™‚

    Here’s to hoping your profit has an extra couple of 0’s this year.

  90. Anna says:

    Your plea worked on me. I just needed a little push to buy it – can’t wait for it to arrive, I love your work. I wish for you way more earnings with less work for this year! I will definitely keep your book in mind for gifts too.

  91. islajmom says:

    i read your book the first day i got it and it will be given to all of my friends for their baby showers this year. thank you for making me laugh all the time.

  92. Sandy says:

    I bought the book it’s hysterical – my kids grew up but I went thru the ‘bathroom-with-a-crowd’ for years – Now I am a grandmother and have done it all over when babysitting – they just come in with me and sit on my lap or get into whatever is possible – a group effort – what can you do! LOL

  93. Kristan says:

    I thought the post was cute! And I totally just bought your book. I’ve got some trips coming up in the next week or so, so I’m saving it for then. Keep it up lady! I don’t comment a lot, but I read every post and thoroughly enjoy them. Can’t wait to see what’s in store for the book!

  94. Bridgett P says:

    Okay, okay! I ordered it! I had some Amazon gift cards and spent a whole $0.50 on it! I hope you’re happy! Sending me to poorhouse like that…

  95. Chris says:

    Bought your book and have been recommending it to everyone I know…or at least those who have kids and will truly appreciate the humor and reality behind it all!! I finished it in record time and then wished I read it slower. I know I can just read it again (and I will) but there’s nothing like the first time through a book. My excitement got the best of me. Haha! I hope you sell MILLIONS cause it’s some funny sh*t and you deserve it.

  96. Kirsty says:

    I have bought three copies already! Come on people, awesome gifts. Help this mom out. We have all benefited from her blog its time to give a little back ๐Ÿ™‚

  97. Analia says:

    1% Here!!
    Just waiting for my bookplate!

  98. Gissela Baker says:

    Bought it in iBooks! Hilarious!

  99. Mala says:

    Ok, that did it. I just bought a book with my hard earned money acquired from working away from my precious children. I know that feeling, so you better not be lying. I don’t read books anymore as my children eat me up alive when I’m not working, but hoping your book will be different.

  100. Coty says:

    This coming Friday is extra paycheck day.. I’ll be buying e book then. I can’t WAIT!!

    My goal was to wait till my birthday in May to request the book. BUT with DF and his crappy gift buying abilities I’d never get it. LOL

  101. Dayna says:

    Grandma’s do have magical powers. My MIL got my youngest to pee in the potty and count without skipping “3”. When he got home those two things were no longer. It is all the attention I think. I am part of the 1% too. I want to lend it to some friends but I’m afraid I won’t get it back so I think it’ll be a go to gift for other moms. Let’s see…I can think of two moms I need a gift for this month. Perfect.

  102. Kris says:

    Only 1% of us have bought? That must be frustrating! Woman, for all the laughs you’ve given us for FREE supporting you by buying an incredible and hilarious book is the least we can do!

    I’m proudly in the 1% already but just bought another copy for my sister.

  103. Erin says:

    Told my fb friends to buy it if they like being happy and laughing. I preordered mine and love it! I have been reading it to my kids. I know that’s not what it’s intended for, but with some slight on the fly editing I am reading it to them. They LOVE IT. I had shown them the poop monster video so they were primed for the humor. And they recognize themselves in it. Even today something random happened and my oldest said, “this could be a crappy story”. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I wish you all the success you deserve, you have certainly brought a great deal of joy to our lives here.

  104. Laurie says:

    Bought two! One for me and one for a gift! I want you to break $500 this year!

    • Ann says:

      Lol!! Go $500! As a fellow author I also know the sad truth that to make $500 you’ll have to sell a billion copies. Most authors make only a tiny fraction of book price. We’re talking less than a dollar.

      I pre-ordered so I’m in the 1%!

      • Liz says:

        Less than a buck a book?! Good grief no wonder there is the term starving artists.

        • April says:

          Yup. Books have to sell enough copies that they break even with the advance the author got before they ever see royalties. And royalties are tiny because a cut has to go to the publisher and the author’s agent.

          Authors don’t make a lot of money (most don’t make any beyond their advance), even if they end up on bestseller lists. Those who make a living writing have a dozen or more books out and write magazine articles and such to supplement.

  105. christina says:

    It is on my birthday wish list on amazon. If I don’t get it… I’ll buy it my damn self!

  106. Robin Jingjit says:

    I know you weren’t talking to me specifically, but I swear I am buying the day we get to the US. It’s not until July, but I’m going to get more than one copy to compensate.

  107. Blue Fairy says:

    Have just checked it out on the UK Amazon, it should get here sometime in the next 3 weeks. I can’t wait!

    And I thought the post was hilarious, I always get an evil kick out of hearing other moms (and grannies) having the toileting alone issues.
    In our house, if anyone even says the word “toilet” aloud, my youngest all of a sudden needs, most urgently, to spend 40 minutes in there “in private-cy!”

  108. Janet Leese says:

    Mother’s Day is coming. I’ll be buying a truckload for all the mothers in my life. Perhaps that’s a good time for another free book giveaway. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  109. Andrea says:

    I pre-ordered 2 copies! One for myself as one for my sister for her first Mother’s Day. My replacement order is “expected to be delivered on Monday” and I really really hope it is. I wat to read it so badly!

  110. Grammy Lynn says:

    Grammys DO have incredible powers, but it has more to do with the concept of familiarity and toddler contempt (for parents) than it does with actual supernatural powers. Now, as a Grammy myself, I’m sorely tempted to ‘own’ the Supernatural title, but that rightly belongs to Mom-and-Dad who toil daily in the trenches of child rearing, which IS NOT FOR SISSIES!

  111. Mary says:

    Just got my copy…I think sometimes we (being the internet) forget how much we get for free and that we need to support people like you so we can keep getting awesome stuff. Super double high-fives for keeping at it while not making a ton of dough-I know that I certainly appreciate all your hard work! Thanks for making me laugh!!

  112. Kylie says:

    Done. Can’t wait to receive it all the way over the other side of the world in New Zealand. Thanks for keeping me laughing ๐Ÿ™‚

  113. Taylor says:

    I just posted to 3 moms groups’ and my personal fb page an encouragement to buy it, plus the link to the page with the 2 trailers. I think I’ll buy these for Christmas gift exchanges for mama friends, and Mother’s Day gifts for the people on my list. Good Luck!!

  114. Julie B. says:

    I just purchased it. I want to know who the feebs are on Amazon.com already peddling “used” copies of this book, though. Might want to check that out. http://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/0373892748/ref=dp_olp_used?ie=UTF8&condition=used

    • Liz says:

      They aren’t actually “used” they are just retailers who buy wholesale then sell them cheap.

  115. Marissa says:

    I LOVED the book! I read it in one sitting. So what if it was in the bathroom, while I hid from my husband and 7 month old for some verrrrrry precious alone time. Still counts right???

  116. Ian Wrigley says:

    I work for Whitcoulls, a book store chain in New Zealand. Trying to get our buying team to stock your book ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Kewlkiwi says:

      Yes! If you can get Whitcoulls to stock it, I’ll be in line to buy a copy…or two…or three…

  117. I bought your book for my iPad, and I love it! beg away! Every mom MUST READ YOUR BOOK! My husband even read it, and he doesn’t read anything!

  118. Oh, and I plan to give your book as gifts to me friends for their birthdays!

  119. Joey says:

    Okay, I kept putting it off, but I did it finally! On it’s way via Amazon! I’m sure it will be great!

  120. Kylie says:

    Done, bought it, thanks for the reminder! I was always going to buy the book, but I just kept forgetting…procrastination over, I just ordered it 2 minutes ago. Probably helped that my kids aren’t home today to interrupt me ๐Ÿ™‚

  121. Jean Russell says:

    I have two baby showers coming, this will be my gift !

  122. Woolies says:

    I bought it, I love it, and I am encouraging all others to do the same. Will mention this often on my FB page, even though I have only 1% as many fans as your FB page. It can’t hurt, right??

  123. Kelly p says:

    Bought, paid for, and read. And it was awesome, even if I read most of it in the bathroom… Shhh.

  124. Lauren says:

    I ordered 2! and one of them is totally going to be on display for a baby shower game! Does that make up for not pre-ordering when I should have??

  125. Tara Hamel-Mayo says:

    Holy Cow! Where’s you get that grandma from? And can I get one too? Not that I’m dissin my moms…she’s my mom. But if she ever does watch the kids (I.e. I beg her not to make them watch me get a papsmear) someone always has a black eye from some wierd item of furniture and it looks like a mack truck went through my kitchen. Which is all good. Waiting rooms by myself is SOOOOOO worth it.

  126. Carm says:

    I bought one copy but maybe our next step beyond growing the 1% is to encourage people to buy multiple copies for other people, yes? What’s the plan for mother’s day? A Facebook drawing for me to share with friends on May 1 to get them to buy too? Mobilize us! What more can we do?

  127. Doreen says:

    Aww man I’m sorry you aren’t getting more buys… I preordered mine and read it cover to cover during my LO’s only nap of the day. So worth it! Thanks for the laughs!

  128. amy b says:

    Your begging today was enough to remind me I wanted to buy it! Just ordered two…hope Canadian sales count! A little more begging wouldn’t hurt…just call it a friendly reminder:)

  129. Melanie says:

    Ummmm…hello marketing team, get on the Mother’s Day bandwagon now!! What mother WOULDN’T love this as a gift?! The greeting card companies tell us this is THE BIG ONE, so giddy up! And for anyone in my family that may see this….hint,hint…I don’t have a copy yet! But…sigh…I may not be able to wait for Mother’s Day. I suppose I will have to settle for crappy boy’s handprint on an ashtray.

    • Melanie says:

      To clarify, my OWN crappy boy’s handprint, and of course, it’s the ideal gift for someone who doesn’t smoke. The sentimental value alone would fill my heart with unbridled joy and enthusiasm…obviously:)

  130. Brandy P says:

    See now I HAVE to go buy the book. It will be my treat for getting a job…finally…job market sucks ๐Ÿ™ Crappy Illustrations rock!

  131. Jennifer says:

    I am the proud owner of a crappy new book! Just ordered from amazon. You have made me laugh so many times…i can’t wait to receive it. Wish you the best of luck!!

  132. Trisha W. says:

    I am the 1% and am excited to receive my bookplate. ๐Ÿ™‚

  133. Christina says:

    Finished the book tonight – it’s as good as you say it is – yeah you made it! Keep the hard work up girl – cause like children this baby will thrive!

  134. Juliana says:

    I am very appreciative that you don’t do the lame sponsored posts. Every time one of the other “mommy blogs” I read does it, I cringe (and read that blog a little less). So for that, I will buy your book ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Pam says:

      Yes! Totally worth it, nothing worse than when a blog turns into nothing but one giant sponsored post about bleach and peeps.

  135. lori s says:

    I just found out about your blog yesterday and downloaded your book today to my kindle. I’m laughing so hard my cheeks hurt. I love you. Like seriously. I fricken LOVE you! Everyone who reads your blog needs to buy it. It’s money well spent. I haven’t laughed this hard in forever! I have a 7 month old. First baby. The whole sleeping bit at the beginning? That’s exactly what I go thru every night. To hear someone else describe the same experience, well it makes me feel more normal. I hope you make LOTS AND LOTS of money from your book. Thank you so much!

  136. Ann says:

    I posted on Facebook that if anyone was looking to buy me a birthday gift, I wanted your book and luckily my friend responded that she was going to get it for me, even without my prompting! I hope I don’t wake our baby with wild laughter while reading it in bed!

  137. Jill says:

    Yay! 1%! pre-ordered but missed out the bookplate :-(…almost done with the book read 100% while in the bathroom, hiding from my 3 yr old twins! Keep it up, I’ve LOL’d too many times to count from your blog and now your book!

  138. Trilby m says:

    It is only available in the US iBookstore ๐Ÿ™ I even switched regions and got a sample but it won’t let me purchase. When it is available in the australian iBooks ill get it

  139. Lorena says:

    I pre-ordered 2 copies. One for me and one for my friend (and she doesn’t even have kids yet). Yes, I like your bog much! Unfortunately, Barns & Noble list them. I had to reorder. Waiting die them now. Can’t wait to get my hands in them!

  140. Erin says:

    Thanks for all the laughs! I’ve been impatiently awaiting my copy from my inlaws who preordered me the book for Christmas…they still haven’t given it to me (probably decided to keep the awesomeness for themselves!) so I just ordered another one. Can’t wait!!

  141. Shreya says:

    Just bought it! So excited to read it ๐Ÿ™‚

  142. Hannah says:

    Yay! I’m in the 1% too!! ๐Ÿ˜€ I LOVED the book! I’m really hoping for another book to follow ๐Ÿ˜€ … You can put me down as your first pre-order for the next book!! (As long as you sign it for me ๐Ÿ˜‰ … Just kidding!)

  143. Karen says:

    I bought 5 copies pre-order to give as gifts. I’ll probably end up buying 5 more to send out once I get these mailed. I’ve never done this with a book before. Your blog and your storytelling are so insightful and honest and reflect the ridiculous chaos of family life.

  144. Anna says:

    I bought a copy for myself and my mother-in-law (was afraid she’d steal it). My favorite post about lofty training in public places wasn’t in the book. I was so disappointed. ๐Ÿ™

  145. Meg says:

    Have followed your blog for over a year now Amber, absolutely love it! Your begging has worked on me – just bought three copies ๐Ÿ™‚ I have a couple of pregnant friends so now I have baby shower gifts sorted. Thank you for all the laughs.

  146. Melissa says:

    Just ordered it from Amazon! I’m going to try to make it last, I’ll be sad if I read it all in an hour. Then again, I could just start reading all over again. I love the idea of this as a baby shower gift. Now I won’t have to think about what to give – in future I’ll just buy a copy of your book for every expectant Mommy!

  147. Sarah says:

    Of course we will buy it and proudly display our copy at the salon. Shane is still giddy over your blog about him and his pink tangle teaser! So Proud of you!

  148. Anyone who hasn’t yetโ€ฆbuy it! It’s pure gold! I bought my copy through the iBookstore. You can read the first few pages free that way (same for the Kindle, I believe), and once you do you’ll be hooked!

  149. Sharlene says:

    Just bought it. Sorry it took so long.

  150. Monica says:

    I put your book on my registry for 2nd baby and someone bought it for me, I read the whole thing in one sitting! ๐Ÿ™‚

  151. My sister gifted me with your book this week (hopefully she got one for herself too) and it totally made my day. I sat on the couch and laughed for 2 hours straight reading it. Your book is wonderful, and every parent needs their own copy!

  152. Sarah says:

    I pre-ordered the hard copy and then I bought the Kindle version because I was too impatient for the hard copy to arrive. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  153. Kate P. says:

    Ok so I had to go and buy the book after reading this. I’m a newly-minted loyal reader who happens to work for a public TV station do this post tugged at me. It sounds like me saying “it’s pay TV in the honors system. If you watch regularly you should contribute.” So I guess I’m saying I know exactly what you mean. And yes, as loyal readers of your awesome blog the least we can do is buy the book. Rock on, Amber.

    • Sheryl says:

      Yes! It is like public TV. You gotta give some support if you want it to thrive and keep going.

  154. Candi says:

    Done! That was just the reminder I needed, have loved this blog ever since the beginning but never comment. ๐Ÿ™‚

  155. Sheryl says:

    Anyone who enjoys the blog will love the book, seriously!

  156. Cynthia says:

    My husband bought me the book as a surprise. Best present ever!! Then he took my daughters out while I read the first 6 chapters ๐Ÿ™‚

  157. Rachel says:

    I’m glad you did remind me one more time. Clicking on Amazon reminded me that I needed to buy diapers. It’s a win-win.

  158. Kelly says:

    I’m a long time reader but have never commented and was in the 99% until about two minutes ago. Thanks for all the laughs, it takes an amazingly talented person to find the humor in the things that 99.99% of parents experience (not 100%, just in case there’s an exception).

  159. KatyA says:

    Your book is totally #1 on my Mother’s Day list, with a mug from your store to match. I shamelessly remind my hubby … daily. Our little ones are too young to pick out gifts yet, so I can still chuck the kitchen sink at him when I really want something. This gave me a new way to introduce the subject, since he magically gets a free pass on bathroom drama … even when I’m not home. This may not be the jewelry he seems to feel I deserve (I rarely wear any) but bathroom peace is worth more to me than anything sparkly. Never thought I’d say that before my first child was born. Now ….

  160. I bought it! Thanks for not selling out. I haven’t figured out how to make any money blogging without doing things I don’t want to/believe in. So far, on my blog, I’ve made -$40 (yes, minus). Sigh.

  161. Kalea Haran says:

    Just bought two getting sent all the way to Singapore, yah!
    When you come in your world tour I want them signed!

  162. Michelle says:

    No harm in shameless begging ๐Ÿ˜‰ I had already bought two (one for me and one for a friend).

    Any explanation why it’s not in the Aussie iBooks store? I’ve had to go old school and buy it from Book Depositry. No problem it’s just the waiting for it to finally arrive!

  163. Alisha says:

    I’m going to by TWO copies tomorrow! One for me, and one for my pregnant friend, just to give her an idea of what she’s in for.

  164. Hannah H says:

    I just wrote ‘parenting…’ into the searchbar on UK Amazon under books and ‘parenting illustrated with crappy pictures’ was the 7th auto-fill option! And when I clicked on it, it offered me both your book and ‘I just want to pee alone’ – blog mama solidarity there! I’m moving countries in the next couple months but will be buying it when we’re back in the UK!

  165. Claire says:

    I’m in the 1% that bought it! I might even get in the 1% again and buy it for a friend. Both of these things are epic for me as I am a library feind and very rarely buy books to own. Ooo I’m going to request my library buy some!

  166. Nina says:

    I am waiting for my copy to get here! I plan to buy more copies in the future as gifts for fellow new moms who are stressing over the whole “mom” thing.

  167. Katie says:

    International peoples like me who don’t feel like spending $15 on postage can order the book with free postage here! : http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/search?searchTerm=crappy+pictures&search=Find+book
    Just ordered mine ๐Ÿ™‚

  168. Genevieve says:

    I bought it today! And just for you, I left another copy facing frontways (?) out so everyone walking by will notice the cover, rather than it being just spine-forward like all the other books were. I realize I am not expressing myself well, but hopefully you will understand what I am trying to say.

    • Tarina says:

      I think that is an awesome thing you did ๐Ÿ™‚ Sign of a truly dedicated fan to be sure something you enjoy is put out there even to tempt a passerby with it adorable cover! I think next time I am at the book store, I will do that, too!

  169. Tarina says:

    I was on vacation when your book came in the mail from Amazon. I was heart broken!! I wanted to go home! (lol no really!! I was in Kentucky with 3 toddlers and a pre-teen. I wanted to get back to civilization with giant flickering screens to get them to leave me the hell alone! Oh… and read your book lol) – When I got home, my mom brought over my mail she had been collecting and I sat down to read – I read the first HALF in one potty break. My ass was numb and had a red ring, and I couldnt feel my left leg. Apparently, when Daddy is around to take care of the screaming monsters and you have a good book to read, you really CAN hide in the bathroom!

  170. Christine says:

    My kids are asleep. I should be getting ready for bed, but instead I am on the computer and just bought your book. In four days I’ll be reading it when I should be asleep.

  171. SmartCarr03 says:

    I bought 2 copies on Amazon last week! One for me and one for my SIL. Our boys are both 1 and a half and are like brothers and your posts are pretty much our life on a daily basis. Thanks for the laughs!

  172. Ana says:

    Just ordered a copy for myself and one for a friend from Indigo. Can’t wait for it to arrive!

  173. Charlene says:

    I bought your book. Very happy to be part of the 1%…I actually bought 6 copies and gave 5 to friends who I knew HAD to have it. I love your blog. I love every post. This one, however (and I’m sorry for this) I just don’t understand. My daughter never bothers me when I’m in the bathroom. However, if we happen to have to use a public restroom, I make her go in with me just because she is still only 4 and I don’t feel safe sitting on a toilet while she is out amongst the “people of walmart”. LOL So, needless to say I have had my share of horror stories from the potty. For example. Went to Wawa two days ago. Desperate for my cup of coffee, Zoey says she has to go potty. The hubs says he’ll make the coffee while I take her potty. Good deal! NOOOOO!!!! I figure well, while I’m in here, I might as well go too. BIG mistake. We finish washing our hands and go out to the cashier and meet with my husband. My wonderfully smart and articulate child yells to my husband, (you probably heard her) “Daddy, did you know that Mommy can grow a mustache too? It’s on her vagina!” You could have heard a pin drop in that store. That store we go into at least two or three times a day for our coffee supply. That store where we know everyone by name. That store where everyone knows us by name. Yes, THAT store. THAT is the store where my wonderful 4 year old decided to tell everyone about the status of my ahem, not so “private” parts! I guess if you can’t laugh, you shouldn’t have kids. So glad, I can laugh. And will have a wonderful story to tell my grand children so they can get payback for me. ๐Ÿ™‚ Now, go buy Ambers book people. It rocks!

  174. jen says:

    yay! 1 percent here! I bought TWO copies!

  175. Angela says:

    LOVE your blog and had 3 copies of your book shipped to me in New Zealand via Amazon,they arrived within 10days and the two spare copies I have are bound for the laps of two lucky mummy friends who I know will love your book also. Thankyou for all the laughs!!

  176. Chris Blan says:

    Ok, ok….bought your book and it’s ‘crappy’. Reading some of the material again still makes me laugh.

  177. Josette says:

    Bought it. Read it in one night. LOLed the whole way through. Definitely NOT a crappy book – already sharing it with friends ๐Ÿ™‚

  178. Courtney says:

    The other day my toddler followed me to the bathroom. My husband tried to get her out so that I could pee in peace. Then he said, “hah, this is just like in that book you got!”

  179. shilpa says:

    Hey amber can we get this in India? Love your stuff. ..

  180. Sarah says:

    I LOVE the book! I already lent it to a friend and told a bunch of others to go buy it. A friend and I have decided that it’s the new gift we will be giving at baby showers….way more useful than a onesie.

  181. Kay says:

    Done. You’ve convinced me (quite easily since I love your blog). And since I love your blog twice as much as I love any other, I’ve bought two. Good idea with the begging. Thank you for your awesomeness.

  182. Jeeva says:

    Hi Amber, just bought it. Cant wait to read it.
    love your blog.

  183. Amie says:

    Was gonna tell my husband to get me your book for Mother’s Day…but I really don’t want to wait. Plus you asked so nicely I just couldn’t resist ๐Ÿ™‚

  184. Emily says:

    Just bought 4 ๐Ÿ™‚ They’ll make excellent surprise mother’s day presents for friends. I figure since I’ve ponied up $$ for things like Pandora subscriptions to have a nice internet experience not overwhelmed by ads, that it is the least I can do to show my appreciation for your blog. Especially since I’ll be a mother of 2 come July!

  185. Julie says:

    Really, only 1%? I pre ordered three – one for me and two for friends who are pregnant with their second. thanks!!!

  186. LilyT says:

    Your book is so amazing! Of course. I knew it would be. I was so dying to read it, I even paid Amazon extra for faster delivery! (they were poopy and waited several days anyway after the release date… next time I will send you money directly.) My 8 year olds laughed and laughed and laughed and WOULD NOT LET ME READ MY BOOK until they were all finished.

    I am going to buy another one!

    Please continue to be brilliant, funny, compassionate, and wonderful on this lovely blog!

  187. Evelyne says:

    Sorry it took me so long. I’ve just ordered your book.

  188. Jessi says:

    We love you, Amber! You are worth 131 million quadrillion times infinity plus one plus infinity.

    My hubby will be buying your book for me for Mother’s Day. Can’t wait!

  189. SD Murray says:

    I’ll be buying the book as soon as my credit card cycles! I was asked to hold off on purchases until then because someone likes to make sure it can be paid in full. grown ups!

  190. Paige says:

    Can someone help me to find this book??
    I’m in Australia, and I need it as an ebook – but all of those links up there won’t sell it to my country! And I tried searching some Australian ebook stores and the google and nothing!

    I’ve wanted to buy it since you said it was out, but couldn’t work out how!
    And thanks to the great idea of others here, I’m definitely going to buy physical copies for my friends for baby shower gifts

  191. Desine77 says:

    Your pleas worked so I went out to Barnes and Noble tonight and bought a copy. Can’t wait to read it. Good luck lady ๐Ÿ™‚

  192. Marlene Anderson says:

    Okay,okay, I won’t put it off any longer.
    Buying a copy now…

  193. Marlene Anderson says:

    I lied. I didn’t buy one.
    I bought THREE!

    (Mother’s Day gifts.)

    Love you, Amber!!

  194. Charlene says:

    OK, you talked me into it. Headed to Amazon now…

  195. Paige says:

    I just bought 7 copies for friends of mine who need it
    But still no ebook for me *cries*

    Maybe I’ll just injure my eyes reading one of the ones I bought for friends before giving it to them, if I can’t find it as an ebook…

  196. Kalea Haran says:

    For those around the world…..http://www.bookdepository.co.uk

    Will deliver free.

  197. Crystal says:

    3 things:
    a) I didn’t notice the post was crappy or too short. Not till you mentioned it. And I still don’t think it was anything but great.
    b) I read this blog religiously so I bought the book, you’re ‘begging’ definitely worked ๐Ÿ˜‰ (ps beg people to report on Facebook- that’ll up your sales indirectly)
    c) I had to pay $5.99 for shipping! That’s reallllly high for just one book! Are they being shipped from a crappy planet outside our solar system?

  198. M says:

    Um… Yeah. Bought & read. I claim this book as worth the purchase!

    You definitely don’t go into the blog business now-a-days to make money. Well, maybe some people do.

    I hope you’re able to gain some profit from the book sales! Your marketing has been great.

  199. Mandapanda says:

    Your book has been in my amazon shopping cart for a few days, but your plea tipped the scales for me. I bought it for myself as my birthday gift from my husband. Can’t wait for it to come in the mail!!

  200. Anna says:

    Your begging worked, I’ve just bought it on Amazon! Not sure I can wait the 1-3 weeks it will take for it to arrive in the UK…

  201. Julia says:

    I pre-ordered your book!

  202. sarahjane86 says:

    I’m from Australia and I’m buying it! I’m so excited!

  203. Andrea says:

    My copy should be here next week! Can’t wait!

  204. Celine says:

    You need a stockist in Australia! Tried to buy your book from Amazon but couldn’t justify the shipping cost and Ibooks doesn’t sell it to Australia users ๐Ÿ™

  205. Sumรฉ says:

    Thank goodness for my Kindle/ipad! Just got it via amazon…..cannot wait to start!! One click and I’m reading it in South Africa! Thanks for the reminder, Amber!

  206. Rebekah says:

    I bought 2 copies. My mom and MIL are getting one for Mother’s Day! I’m so excited to give the books to them. I don’t know if I can wait until Mother’s Day!

  207. Joy says:

    I’m from Australia and pre-ordered your book. I got it this week, read it, loved it, and ordered another 2 to give as gifts to my friends. I have loved your site for years now and am so rapt you took this step. Thank you for all the hard work, it’s what I look forward to the most at the start of my day.

  208. Lell says:

    I’m sorry Amber! I have been following you since the beginning of Crappy Pictures, and never commented until today. I’d been meaning to buy your book for ages, but kept leaving it on my to-do-list. Just bought two copies! The perfect baby shower/new mama gift.

    I’m in Australia and purchased from Booktopia.

    I think there are lots of us who would also like to show our appreciation for all the laughter you’ve brought us, by way of PayPal. I know it might be a bit uncomfortable for you, but it *is* in our best interests to help fund the hilarity of your blog! Would you consider adding even a tiny PayPal link somewhere on your site? Minuscule percentages from book sales don’t seem enough. We want to thank you directly.

    Thank you, THANK YOU, thank you for being such an awesome voice in the community of online mamas. Big huge love to you. You are an incredible mama and wife, an inspiration, and I just wish I knew you in real life.

    And I’d love to know what happened with the unschooling, if you ever get back to that blog ๐Ÿ™‚ Pirates?

  209. Rachel says:

    I bought it ๐Ÿ™‚

  210. erin says:

    off to buy one for me and 2 for preggie friends!

  211. Julia says:

    I’m from Germany, but I pre-ordered your book a few weeks ago and got it delivered to my brother who lives in New Jersey. I visited him last week so I got my book as soon as it was delivered! YAY!!! I stopped reading after a few pages so I would have something fun to do during the flight back to Germany (which worked well – had to try not to laugh too loud so the other passengers wouldn’t think I’m nuts). My sister-in-law (like me, she has three kids, unlike me, she had never heard about your blog before) read it and found it hilarious! Hope she won’t keep the bookplate (which will be send to her house) for herself! ๐Ÿ™‚

  212. Sarah says:

    Too funny. When Grandma is at our place she can never get away from the kiddos.
    Also, I’m in that 1% I pre-ordered the book when you said we could. More people should. You have given us so much. Its the least we can do.

  213. Victoria says:

    Just bought the kindle version (too impatient to wait once the decision is made). It’s funny and more-ish, but you would never guess why it makes me so happy… I just found someone else whose feet grew during pregnancy and never went back. That’s a first ๐Ÿ™‚

  214. Liz says:

    I was waiting for Mother’s Day, but I can’t stand to have you beg, bought the kindle edition. A link is going on my Facebook page now. Maybe I will threaten relatives that they won’t get more pictures of my kids if they don’t buy your book too!

  215. Oana says:

    Got the book! Looking forward to reading it.
    Thanks for the laughs on the blog.
    My baby is only 1 so I an actually laughing in advance expecting all sorts of stuff I read here to happen to us in the near future.

  216. Anna-Marie says:

    I am so buying the book once moving chaos settles! Good to know the bathroom issue is universal, lol!

  217. Jenn says:

    I received my copy from my husband as my crappy birthday gift! ๐Ÿ™‚ but in reading the comments, I realized I should order another one for my SIL who is having her first baby in October! Thanks for the great shower gift idea people.

  218. Sally Wilton says:

    I’ve preordered the book via Amazon but it’s not coming out until June (hopefully in time for my birthday) in the UK. Until then, I will keep sharing you, Amber!

  219. Alex says:

    Amber, I really really really want to buy your book. Sadly, even at $131 you made more money than me last year. After adopting our sweet girl, extreme plumbing repairs, daycare, and grad school, I’m pretty sure my income is in the negative even though I work as close to full time as possible… ๐Ÿ™ I’m really hoping to get your book for my birthday.

    • Alex says:

      What I mean to say is I really want to support you because you are totally awesome and you bring so much cheer to my life.

  220. Melissa says:


  221. LMM says:

    From another 1% reading in the bathroom….loved the book! It’s a perfect baby shower gift, but also for moms of toddlers, teenagers, pretty much everyone! Thanks for the daily laughter!

  222. Laura says:

    I bought 2 copies of your book! One for me and one for a stressed out mommy friend. Good luck with your 2013 earnings!

  223. Lisa Lutes says:

    It’s ridiculous that you would only make $131 but that horrible Dooce woman rakes in over 100,000 a year at her blog.

  224. Mercedes says:

    I got it pre-ordered on Kindle and read it in one morning! I was laughing so hard I had tears rolling down my cheeks. I figured I should support you for all the hours of joy I have received.

  225. Jessica says:

    I bought it! I know how book sales work and it’s HARD to make a living as a writer. Keep on keepin’ on!

  226. Carly says:

    I am dying to read your book, but it isn’t out here in paperback till May (sorry, in France and they are soooo slow sometimes, and I prefer paperback to hardback, easier to throw in my purse on the go with kids)! OKay, that is only one month away, but you are definitely on the top of my amazon list.

    I wish my mom had magical powers. She is as bad as the kids! Once I went to the store and let her watch my two eldest boys who were 3 & 5 at the time, when I came back the boys were dancing on the coffee table and she was dancing and singing to them! I was like, omg what is wrong with you? LOL

  227. Mary says:

    I bought FOUR books. One for me, and the others are gifts for friends. Still didn’t had time to read more than 5 pages but I hope some day I’ll get quality time in the bathroom without chaos!

  228. Alan says:

    Just bought it via Amazon. Thanks for everything you do.

  229. Bridgit says:

    okay! I bought it. Well, bought 2. No idea who is getting the 2nd one yet though ๐Ÿ™‚ Love you Amber —

  230. Sara says:

    I already bought a book. You have to write another one quickly… so I can buy that one too. Hurry, I know you have TONS of free time.

  231. Tash says:

    I hate using my cc to buy books on Kobo (I hate using the cc period, so I usually wait til I have a gift card), but I will buy it later, and maybe get to read it after the kids are in bed!

  232. sanj says:

    Only 1%? Is that how many pre-ordered? Or how many bought?
    My daughter had her first baby in mid-March, and now that she can go out to rerrands, we went to B&N with the new baby and bought your book. We love it. We don’t know exactly how it the behind-the-scenes money stuff works, but we paid full price ($17+tax) without asking for any discounts, because we wanted you to get as much money as you can for the great work you’ve done. Do you get less if people buy discounts, used copies, or Nook/Kindle?

    I have a cute photo of Daddy reading your book to 3-week old little one, and they both look happy. If you want to see it, let me know how to send it to you.

  233. sanj says:

    Only 1%? Is that how many pre-ordered? Or how many bought?
    My daughter had her first baby in mid-March, and now that she can go out to run errands, we went to B&N with the new baby and bought your book. We love it. We don’t know exactly how it the behind-the-scenes money stuff works, but we paid full price ($17+tax) without asking for any discounts, because we wanted you to get as much money as you can for the great work you’ve done. Do you get less if people buy discounts, used copies, or Nook/Kindle?

    I have a cute photo of Daddy reading your book to 3-week old little one, and they both look happy. If you want to see it, let me know how to send it to you.

  234. Lynette says:

    I used to forbid my mom from holding my guys (now adults) as babies. There was something supremely soporific about her shoulders–they’d go comatose and then fall asleep for hours when she held them. Then I’d get stuck with freshly napped-yet-curiously-disoriented-and-cranky-about-it baby when it was all over. (Now that my boys are bigger and facing all the crappy trials and tribulations of adulthood, they frequently mention how there are some days when they wish someone would pick them up and throw them over their shoulder, ala Grandma, and pat their backs until they could fall into a blissfully ignorant slumber.)

  235. Adrienn says:

    I love your blog, so I know I will love your book…as buying books is a luxury for me I plan to buy your book with my next “I have enough money to buy a book!” money…until then I just have to imagine how awesome it is. And, because blog friends help each other (we’re friends, right?..) I’m “selling” your book on my blog through amazon associates. If you happen to click on over, you’ll see you…right there at the top! Best of luck to you!

  236. KiwiBunnz says:

    I’m not in the 1% sorry, but I did find out where I can buy it in New Zealand –


    It is on my wishlist and it will be bought as soon as I get back from the holiday I am actually about to take with my son (his first ever holiday!) and my mate from England. I am guessing all my savings will be spent on petrol during that!

  237. Noelle says:

    I was just waiting till my bills were paid to get your book. But I just now bought the Kindle version. Now to go read it! ๐Ÿ˜€

  238. Brittany M. says:

    My coworker and I both bought it and display it proudly at our desks! ๐Ÿ˜‰ I have already had several other coworkers ask about it .

  239. Laura says:

    Very much enjoying my copy, and now I just bought a copy for my friend who is expecting her second. I love your work! Thank you so much!

  240. LeahM says:

    I enjoyed looking at your amberdusick.com site today. Loved seeing your wooden toys and the ceramic project with your older son. It was inspiring to me that you’ve been so productive while also raising kids. Do you ever sleep? ๐Ÿ™‚

  241. Ingrid Johanns says:

    I am in your 1%… and I even ordered one for a friend too. But now I’m tempted to go order another one for another friend. THAT is how much I enjoy your blogging efforts. ๐Ÿ™‚ You always give me a full belly LOL (well, Ok today’s post might have missed the mark, but it did give me a chuckle that you KNEW it did and acknowledged it!!) LOVE your blog and I already finished your book and am waiting for the sequel. Get going already!!! What are you waiting for!!??

  242. Robin says:

    Will buy one for me and at least one more for a friend. Will also recommend to all my FB friends. Love and relate to all your work!!!

  243. Julie says:

    Of course I will buy the book. Just wait a little longer. I’m busy too, ya know. But I have at least three of Heather Cushman-Dowdee’s books and she is not rich yet either. If you want to get rich, I recommend growing those boys up, sending them to school, and getting a full time job outside the house. But then you will have to pay more in clothing, transportation, meals, after school and summer care, etc. and won’t see your family as much. I’m working 3 part time jobs and still trying to play stay at home mom and that made it so that I could afford to replace the washer when it died. But that’s about it. Oh and I can afford your book with the paypal money I made selling my hair a couple years ago. So I will buy the book.

  244. Mari says:

    Hooray 1%!

  245. Leanna says:

    I put your book on my birthday list. Won’t get it til June. ๐Ÿ™‚

  246. Dorothy says:

    You has me at $131 last year. Just bought the iBook version. I hope you get rich! Love your blog.

  247. angel says:

    I bought it as a gift for my son’s 2nd birthday. He’s still alive, so I figured I deserve something nice. ๐Ÿ™‚ besides, laughing keeps me sane and

  248. Dorothy says:

    Ugh, has should be had. iPhone fail.

  249. Ceri says:

    We bought it last night at barns & noble. Would have pre-ordered it but I like to shop brick and mortar… Awesome! Already done with it. OMG, the travel chapter… I almost wet my pants!!! Well done Amber well done!

  250. Bethany says:

    Preordered the book AND bought another copy for my sister as her birthday gift. We BOTH <3 it! I have already plastered your trailer all over my wall and I will keep spreading the word to my peeps. ๐Ÿ™‚ Keep up the good work!

  251. Zoe Kunstenaar says:

    Ok. Appeal worked. I just bought it!

  252. Chris Carter says:

    So I thought I was in the 1% when I assumed (what was I thinking?) that my hubs had gotten it for me like I asked him to. (long story) He was all… “Uh yeah…that free ebook you forwarded right?” And I was all… “WHAT free Ebook are YOU talking about?? It was NOT free!!” And he was all..”oh.” And I was all..”Well that’s just GREAT. You KNOW how much I love Crappy Pictures and I wanted that book YESTERDAY. Amber’s all mad at me, and I now know how she can be, because I THOUGHT we had HAD bought the book and now you’re saying you didn’t buy the book for me and I feel absolutely CRAPPY about it! (pun intended for comical purposes) I will be driving to the store tomorrow and buying the damn thing. Pff. (Forgive me!!)

  253. Amanda says:

    Just purchased from Amazon!

  254. Sheridan says:

    Just bought two copies in South Africa from kalahari.com! Said it will take 17 days to get here, but hey, this is Africa. Counting the days!

  255. Sheila DeMare says:

    Thanks for the laughs, Amber. I bought your book today after the begging. Sorry to bring you to that, I should have bought it sooner!
    Wishing you much more than $131 this year.

  256. Cydnie says:

    I promise I am planning to buy your book! I don’t usually post because I am pretty busy as a new mom (ten month old baby boy) and read your blog off my phone whenever I get an email notice that you post! and I am working to help my husband pay our ever increasing pile of bills, just wanted you to know I will support you! I love your blog! I will probably buy more than one copy for gifts for some of my friends who are about to become moms. It helps so much with the stress of it all to enjoy some humor about the joys and the ..not so joyful.. Parts of of motherhood, haha.
    Thnk you for being so awesome, and writing a book about it. ๐Ÿ˜€
    -New Mommy Cydnie

  257. Cydnie says:

    P.S. today is my birthday and I was going to have my husband take me to pick it up today but we had some car trouble. But next week will definitely be Crappy Week for me! So stoked.

  258. Robyn says:

    OMG – $131? You’re rich!! You’re Rich!!! You made a whole $31 more than I have!

    Please do me a favour and do NOT spend it all in one shop!

    Good luck with the book sales, and I hope you make more profit in 2013. At least to get the whole family down to New Zealand for a holiday ๐Ÿ™‚

  259. rosecitymama says:

    First time poster, long time follower. I agree with one of the first posters — for all the laughs I’ve had while reading your blog during the dark of night while nursing my infant son, the shuddering-so-as-to-not-wake-my-deeply-slumbering-husband, the price of the book is a big ol’ bargain!

    P.S. I love drinking my morning coffee out of my Crappy mug. ๐Ÿ™‚

  260. Melissa says:

    I follow your blog and my husband reads an occasional post. He just happened to see this one last week and asked me to order TWO copies of your book so that we could keep one and give one away. They arrive Monday! Thanks for all your hard work, and I do hope you turn a bigger profit this year!

  261. Amanda Reed says:

    The trick is to not announce that’s where you’re going. You just slip out of the room when they’re not paying attention, turbo pee, quick wash your hands, and use sanitizer as you’re walking back out to their space. ๐Ÿ˜›

  262. Stephanie says:

    You got me! I’ve really enjoyed your blog and your begging and honesty motivated me to go buy your book for myself…and 3 more copies for my closest girlfriends with kids :). NOW you must be up in the $150 range or something! Seriously though, really enjoy your work, thank you!

  263. Jennifer says:

    I just got your book the other day. After sneaking away and locking myself in the bathroom to read it (that didn’t work by the way) I stayed up late and finished it last night. I had to read it in the living room because I got kicked out of the bedroom for laughing and interrupting the hubby’s sleep. I ordered another copy when I got up this morning so I can give it to my sister at her baby shower later this month. She’s having her 4th boy so she can relate and will need some laughs!!

  264. Beth says:

    For the record, I didn’t think it was a crappy post. Also, I ordered your book but I’m still waiting. And don’t worry! It has over 200 reviews on Amazon and it’s 5 stars! That’s awesome!

  265. Kristy says:

    ok, so…..I just learned about his blog on Friday. It is now Sunday morning and I’ve read every post on this site! I am going out and buying the book TODAY! Thanks Amber, my new BBB (best birthday buddy), I will be telling all my friends to go buy it too!! Cheers from Vancouver, Canada

  266. Opened my AOL just now and there you were (your crappy pictures) on the main page. WOOT !!

  267. Ashley B says:

    Part of the 1%! I pre-ordered and everything (it was the sticker that got me). And I’ve been telling everyone with ears to buy your book!

  268. Amy Jo says:

    I have secretly been reading your book in the bathroom. I’m able to do that now – well mostly. (My boys are 9 & 11.) I love your book and your blog!

  269. Cat says:

    Just picked up your book at Barnes and Noble here in Honolulu! Can’t wait to devour it!

  270. Carol says:

    got it. And one for my sister. and fyi, I HAVE to read it in the bathroom because after having two children I can no longer laugh that hard and not pee my pants … ๐Ÿ™‚

  271. Noelle says:

    Finished the book in one sitting (after my daughter went to sleep). HILARIOUS!!! My favorite part was Crappy Papa’s “bathroom break” in the travel chapter. (And that’s all I’m saying about my favorite part so as not to ruin it for others who haven’t read it yet.)

  272. Yes we Grandma’s DO have magical powers – and I bought your book today on Amazon, thanks for making me laugh daily. You are the best! Tell Crappy Boy his cards are wonderful, too!

  273. Jen says:

    I’m going to the book store tomorrow, I planned on picking up one copy for myself and one for my sister. =)

  274. Hazel says:

    I went to the bathroom and my eldest son bit my youngest one on the arm. My husband freaked out and asked me “what are you going to do with them now?” Ermmmm…. let them continue to fight each other? Because my intervening only stopped them for a short while. Grrrr. So hubby and I had a fight as well. As you do when your kids stress you out. Freaking dysfunctional family ๐Ÿ™

  275. Maria says:

    I bought the book last week on my phone and stayed up until 3am reading it! My 4 month old is up for the day at 7. I want a hard copy too now to keep where visitors can look at.

    Your blog was recommend on a post on Baby Center a month or so ago.

    We’re on a tight(ish) budget, but I figured I’d buy it since I enjoy reading the posts so much. Totally worth it! I love showing it to my husband. He’s been joking with me all week about some of the topics.

  276. Oh, I always feel a little overwhelmed to comment on a post that has already 300+ comments… but just wanted to de-lurk and say I LOVE your blog (only discovered it a few weeks ago, don’t know why it took me so long) and the ‘while mama is in the bathroom’ series truly resonates with me (as many of your other posts too). I have currently a mix: the 3.5-year old is silently playing while the 14-month old is banging on the door (but sometimes his brother joins him)… My funniest moment was when I once took a shower when the baby was only a few weeks old. His big brother had climbed into the playpen with him, had undressed himself completely (diaper and all) and tried to breastfeed his little brother (who almost latched on)! And of course I didn’t have a camera handy…

    Still in the 99% of readers not having bought the book, but I have a (lame) excuse that Amazon France won’t have it available before May 17.

  277. Karen (Scotland) says:

    Just bought it on amazon.co.uk as payment for all the laughs you’ve given me over the last year I’ve been reading.
    Worth every penny.

  278. Kris says:

    I am desperate to buy your book, but my birthday’s in less than two weeks and I’m hoping someone will take pity on me and get it for me as a gift. If they don’t, there will be wailing and then an immediate trip to the bookstore. ๐Ÿ™‚ I’ll probably be buying multiple copies, too, for friends of mine who are actually parents (of actual little people persons, not like me who is only a dog parent and AWESOME auntie)!

  279. mary says:

    I preordered your book and it arrived right on time from Amazon. Love it!

  280. Ann says:

    I pre-ordered and the day it arrived I read it immediately. Loved it! It took me a few days but I did finally go to amazon, where I ordered from, and posted a review.

    Good luck with your book and thank you so much for all the enjoyment I’ve gotten from your blog!

  281. Rosanne Frazer says:

    I went to Chapters and bought your book yesterday and am loving it!

  282. J. Haven says:

    Bought a copy of your book for myself last month, hurt myself laughing, then promptly gave it to my daughter-in-law’s sister, who just had her second baby. I was going to buy another copy today after errands, read it again and fall over laughing, then give it to my pregnant co-worker, and buy another copy each month and give it away until the whole world has been Crappified – but I think I’ll go ahead and buy 3 this time – I certainly have people to give it to, and it’ll bump up your first-month sales!

    Keeping my fingers crossed on that Grandma magic ๐Ÿ˜€

  283. Tiffany Smothers says:

    I bout it the day it came out ! Unfortunately my hands are too full to read it..

  284. DMTabery says:

    Book bought. Purchase advertised on Facebook. Yay!

  285. Brandice says:

    Just bought it! Feel bad though, i ordered it off walmart and it was onsale for $11, i hope you still get as much money. I promise to buy more for all my uptight first time parent friends to gift at their perfectly lame baby showers though ๐Ÿ™‚

  286. Jana says:

    Okay Amber, your faithful 1% have convinced me to buy the book. I ordered it from Amazon and “my husband will give it to me for mother’s day”… reminicient of your Birthday post! http://crappypictures.com/my-birthday-present/

  287. Heather H. says:

    I decided to order the kindle version, and right now I am just overly fascinated by the fact that the cover picture appears to be 3-dimensional on my Note II. *pokes at the speech bubbles that look like they’re coming up off the page* Is this just an optical illusion?

  288. Amanda says:

    Please beg again next friday. I’m living off of credit cards for the next week but plan on buying the book as soon as I don’t have to pay interest for it.

  289. Meredith says:

    The first time my mother in law watched both kids, the first words out of her mouth when I returned were “how do you pee????” Answer 1: I don’t. Answer 2: Fast.

    I bought two copies and plugged you on my blog! ๐Ÿ™‚ I know that’s not much, but I had a crazy amount of entries in my giveaway!

  290. Jess says:

    I am sorry I didn’t pre-order. To make up for it, I went to walmart.com last night and bought two copies, one for me and one for my sister’s first mothers day.

  291. Stephanie says:

    I would totally buy a book but I don’t have a credit card ๐Ÿ™ I feel like I’m missing out!

  292. AB says:

    I’m in the 1% although being in Australia I haven’t received it yet. I bought it through fishpond.com.au who offer free shipping to those in Aus.

  293. Janelle says:

    I have to say it. It’s been on my mind since the first while mama was in the bathroom:
    Leave the door open and allow them to come into the bathroom while you go. Pee or poo. Doesn’t matter.

    I’ve never closed the door to my kid (for that matter, and to the eternal dismay of my husband, never to my husband either) and she most often doesn’t care. If she needs me, she’ll come in. But most often she couldn’t care less.

    Sorry. I had to say it. (I hope you read this. And I hope you don’t hate me for it.)

  294. Angela says:

    Ok so I found your website from ‘5 minutes for mom’ which I found from ‘co-pilot mom’. I read through a few of your posts and then found this one. I must admit I always think that someone has made it when they get a book published, so I can’t imagine how it feels to be on the other end. So I followed your link to Amazon to check out your book. I almost clicked on the ‘add to cart’ and thought, better not be hasty let me look through it first. The preview was about four pages long and I laughed so hard my eye teared up. Needless to say the book is purchased and on its way.

  295. Jill says:

    I love this blog and can’t wait to enjoy your book (sorry it took me so long to order)! Also, I had no idea I was already a fan of yours when I started reading this blog. Before my son was born, I read SO many of the tutorials on your Make Baby Stuff website. It was one of the sites that got me into sewing clothes. So, thank you! Basically, I think you must be awesome at everything. ๐Ÿ™‚

  296. Stasi says:

    You’re right, bloggers usually do their thing for free and it’s so great you are getting the recognition you deserve. Please enjoy it, you earned it! And realize that money wouldn’t be the reason you’ve “arrived” – it’s getting a loyal following, and a book deal (holy crap that is rare – you do realize almost nobody EVER gets a book deal these days, right?!), and all this press support (again super rare even for established authors!), and yes even that tiny profit mentioned is quite something – having sponsors! Wow! That would be huge. Most bloggers work all year for nothing or at a loss – as you know, you’ve been there – so just accept the accolades b/c it’s meant to be supportive. I sure as hell would announce that I had arrived if I had even ONE of those things going for me. But I’m way too lazy. Still, lots of bloggers work really hard and don’t have success. They’re not as funny as you I imagine, or maybe just not as lucky. Either way, I hope you DO enjoy your success – realize it IS success – and don’t just measure it by money!!

    And if nothing else, maybe you can revel in knowing that many other small-potatoes bloggers & writers are super, super, super jealous of you. Surely that’s “arriving” isn’t it?

    OK I waited so this post would be buried since I don’t want to risk the wrath of your fans. I truly mean it as a “buck up little lady, you HAVE made it, life’s more than money blah blah” post. Hope it helps.

  297. neo says:

    Good luck with the book! That’s funny about grandma. At least you know that you’ll forget all this trouble some day.

  298. LCF says:

    You are so right. I have been enjoying your blog from about the time it started and it has brought my husband and me so many smiles and laughs. I just got my copy in the mail! Can’t wait to dig in!

  299. Janessa says:

    Amber –
    I love and appreciate the honesty in this post!
    So I have only been following your blog for a few months now. Oh my – how I wish I would have discovered it sooner.
    I asked for your book for Mothers Day. A job loss looms in our home and I’m still on mat leave. So I figured I would tough it out until the.
    After sending the link to my darling husband, he replies with “it’s not very expensive, and Coles (our l

  300. Janessa says:

    Ooops I screwed something up there.
    Coles is our local bookstore.
    So he says they have five copies (panic buttons are triggered, but still I’m determined to wait it out).
    Anyway the last night I came home to my lovely new Crappy Parenting book, complete with handprints from my beautiful children inside the cover!
    Happy Early Mothers Day, this amazing man says to me!
    Aren’t I lucky?!!?
    So I have your book!! I’m singing it’s praises while I giggle loudly at risk of waking the finally sleeping children.
    I feel though, that all of us Mamas should make it mandatory for the Papas to read so they can get some therapeutic chuckles from it as well.
    Mine thought the “nurse nurse” drawings were pretty damn funny!

  301. Jenn says:

    I bought your book on iBooks the day after it came out and loved it! Great job from one fellow momma to another. Rock on Amber!

  302. Lia says:

    Hi Amber, I love the ‘while mama was in the bathroom’ series, especially the picture you drew of the little fingers coming under the door! I’d love to see a ‘while the kids were sleeping’ series x

  303. Anne_Hedonia says:

    SIGH. Okay, YES, I’m going to buy your book. I want you to know – because I’m a selfish unique tulip whose every move must be observed and applauded – I’m buying your book even I have a sick husband and am in between jobs. Why? Because what you said is so right on. I am a writer and an artist, and I love it when people appreciate my work, but honestly I REALLY love it when they appreciate with dollars. Artists should be paid more than hedge fund managers, but that’s a rant for never because of yawning.

    tl;dr: I’m buying your book.

  304. Pingback: The Brutal Truth About Making Money as a Writer? | shannon meyerkort

  305. Janet says:

    For all you moms out there that need a nanny or babysitter, please trust me and go to http://www.NannyCare.com. I found a great nanny on this site the same day. It will save you tons of time and money! When I first started my business I was working 24/7 and really needed help with my children so that I could focus and get my company off the ground. I was able to find an experienced, reliable, local nanny in my budget quickly!