Potty Trained

Crappy Baby is potty trained. I kept meaning to incorporate that in a post and then I sorta forgot. Until today. 

underwear

He hasn’t worn a diaper since May. I kept drawing him the old way and will continue to draw him the same because drawing underwear is hard. 

Plus, I never promised accuracy. In fact, today he looks much more like this:

underwear2

And that just takes way too long. Plus, now that I think about it even that isn’t accurate. He prefers to wear his underwear backwards because the cool pictures are on the back and he likes to see them. 

Now that I’ve brought up the topic, I can share a few tidbits about potty training the 2nd time around. 

It has been slightly different.

Remember this post about potty training and public toilets?

Well Crappy Baby added an extra special plot twist:

potty training clothes

At first, he required being completely naked to pee or poop. Even in public. Shoes too.

Have you seen the floors of public restrooms? Like the ones at gas stations? I fear for the health of his feet. 

And as many people mentioned in the comments of that post, auto-flush toilets are evil. He hates them. (Fortunately, thanks to the comments on that old post I already knew the post-it note trick and the wet tissue over the sensor trick. Thanks!)

And potty training was not without a few accidents. One of the memorable times was when we were at Wendy’s house. This happened:

potty training accident

I was telling her how he is potty trained now. While he peed on her floor in the next room. Nice.  

(He also peed on the back steps at her daughter’s birthday party while he was eating cake last week. The first accident in ages. It is her fault. Her house is way too fun and the cake was way too tasty. Nobody should be expected to make it to the bathroom under those “having too much fun” conditions. Not even me. She knows what that means.)

And as luck would have it, he got diarrhea shortly after the diapers came off:

potty training poop water

Bad timing. (Also? Poop water! Is that not the best name for diarrhea ever? I’m calling it that from now on. “Sorry, I can’t hang out tonight, I’m experiencing poop water.”)

 And this is what he said to me today, which is what reminded me to write this post:

privacy

He likes to be alone! Totally different than Crappy Boy who wants to chat the entire time. 

So yeah. Potty trained. But the pictures will stay the same. For now. 

underwear1

You’ll just have to now see them as underwear instead of diapers.

It will be our little inside joke.

—————

Yay! Now when people ask me, “Why is he still in diapers?” I can just refer them here. (And if you were referred here by me I hope you weren’t an asshole about it. Judgy and shit. I hate that.)

We have one of those Toilet Seat Potty Seat combo things on our toilet so both kids just use the big one. No potty chairs to clean out.

And in case you are curious, we pretty much use the method outlined by Oh Crap. Potty Training who happens to be a sponsor of this here blog. But it isn’t really a method. More like a philosophy?  Anyway, it worked for us. No bribes. No stickers. No shame. No charts. No stress. It works too well actually, this post would be much better if I could complain about how hard potty training is. Sorry to disappoint. I’m sure they’ll do stuff that pisses me off next week though. Probably they’ll break something or set the couch on fire. Fingers crossed.  

This entry was posted in crappy pictures, parenting, poop, potty training. Bookmark the permalink.

229 Responses to Potty Trained

  1. Vicki says:

    I also went straight for the smaller potty seat onto of the big potty to train the 2nd kid, there was something about cleaning out the little bucket that made me gag more than cleaning a bad poop diaper. Now it’s just a flush away and I love it! Plus it keeps the potty training in the bathroom where it belongs. My oldest wanted to sit on hers while watching TV, learning to poop in the family room is a bad idea!

  2. Cynthia says:

    We have one of those dual seats. Love it. We also have a potty chair, but that just means that daughter and I don’t have to fight over the toilet when we both need to pee, as long as I get there first and can claim the big potty. I’d have to be pretty desperate to pee in the little potty.

    • annie says:

      Oh my… done that. We keep a little bjorn one in the car for emergencies. Fortunately, my kids who were laughing at me hysterically during MY emergency were too young to remember that incident…

    • Heather says:

      We got one of those toilet seat locks, and since my husband was supposed to put it on but never seemed to get around to it, I did it one day while he was at work. I had warned him that I wasn’t going to show him how it worked if he didn’t put it on, so he came home and had to go…but couldn’t get the toilet open. Needless to say, it was HIS job to clean out the little potty after that one. (We already had one because I often watch the neighbor’s 2yo who is in the process of potty training.) Oh, and all the other baby proofing? He was more than happy to get right on top of it.

  3. Tina says:

    We are potty training now, have been for about a month. And my son looks a lot looks a lot like your’s most days, crazy hair and green froggy rain boots included. Except for the times when he isn’t wearing anything!

    • amber says:

      Yeah, he often likes to be naked WITH froggy boots on. (Which he calls his “froggers”) I’ve only taken 4000 photos of this.

      • Heather d says:

        My baby brother was CONSTANTLY naked with rubber boots on. We have multiple photos of it. They do eventually grow out of it…

      • neal says:

        The problem is, with a little naked kid in rain boots, there’s a very convenient but undesirable bit of equipment reader to approximate “it’s raining, it’s pouring!”

      • DianeMargaret says:

        I have a BUNCH of pictures of our daughter running around in her pink cowboy (oh, sorry, cowGIRL) boots waving a flag!!! What a true little American! LOL
        She’s OBSESSED with flags for some reason! I thought she was going to have a heart attack in late June when all the Fourth of July stuff showed up in the stores!!! She now has about 15 of them hanging about. I was thinking of making her a quilt with flags on it but I’m a little afraid she’s try to wave it around!

    • Deb says:

      My little potty training lady wears her pink owely rain boots as often as she can find them. DH frequently hides them…”those boots are to hot” he says. But I find them and sure as @#$$ (potty humor) she is running around in the buff with the boots on. Only problem is, in the back of my mind I am constantly worried they will turn into little pee-pee catchers when she has an accident. Maybe its different with the boy equipment.

      Lol, LL has to get na=na before using the potty too. In public restrooms she also wants to flush the toilet with her foot like mommy. Not an easy demand to fulfill or deny. How much frigen’ time do we need to spend in the public restroom? Seriously.

  4. Jennifer says:

    Poop water?! That is awesome. I love that saying.
    My oldest never wanted privacy in the bathroom and the youngest now wants “privaseat”. It’s cute and we still have lots of accidents. Funny how the kids are completely different.

  5. Deborah says:

    Way to go Crappy Baby!!!

  6. CAMI STEWART says:

    Am I the first to comment!? What an honor. I love your site.. thanks for the laughs!! My little lady just potty trained herself recently.. way too easy over here too. :)

  7. karen says:

    Love it… hope that he gets better!

  8. Holly says:

    We call diarrhea butt pee in this family. Classy right?

  9. nikki says:

    Hahahaha poop water! Makes much more sense than diarrhea, I mean what kind of a word is that anyways…

  10. Leia says:

    I am wishing my 2 yr old would be potty trained already. Instead he finds peeing on the front proch, my bedroom floor, and anywhere else that’s not allowed to be too much fun. He fears the toilet and thinks that peeing in a potty chair to be sacrilegous.

    • Leia says:

      and he demands I stay inside whie he is outside pooping. He needs to be alone.

    • Rebecca says:

      In my experience, you can spend the entire “2” year potty training and have them trained at 3, or you can start at 3 and have them trained in a weekend. :)

      Loved this post!

      • Bridget says:

        Amen, with our second we kept putting it off until he was three and he potty-trained in no time!

        • Talia says:

          Interesting! Our daughter is 2 and 3 months, and this has kind of been my gut instinct. People keep saying I should be TT, and I make a half-hearted attempt to do the toilet thing most days, but she just likes to hang out on the toilet and chat! Maybe it’s the lazy heavily pregnant side of me, but I’m inclined to just wait at least 4 more months until the weather is hot and the new babe is settled in!

      • Amy says:

        Ha ha! Love it! I also only trained my first at 3. I started at 2 with grandparental pressure, and gave up after 2 weeks.

    • sarane1 says:

      Jamie is so awesome! You totally need her OH CRAP book! She rocks! My kid did it in a week essentially…. With some fine tuning here and there.

      • Maggie F says:

        Yes I love her book, and my son “had it” in just over 2 days. Seriously. And that was SO NOT the case with my older son….we waited TOO LONG and it was awful. She has the most amazing knowledge in that book- it was worth every dang penny and more. (My youngest has had one nighttime accident since we started. One. And we have had only 2 daytime accidents since he “got it” almost 3 weeks ago.) That said, I agree every child probably has a “window” where it is awesomely easy….and we totally hit that window. I seriously owe this blog a crap-ton of thanks for introducing me to the book….

        • Happy says:

          Ditto! I found Jayme’s book through the blog as well and my 19 month old was fully trained in less than a week (and really excited about it). Privacy was the biggest issue we had to overcome – he wouldn’t go with us in the room but still needed help getting things figure out. Nice catch 22. Now, as soon as he’s situated, he says “ba-bye, weave now”. So funny.

  11. Sarah says:

    I’m glad I’m not the only one whose kid (aged 2) screams “NO NO NO GET OUT!” if I try to be in the same room when she’s going to the toilet. She’ll even get up mid-poop to slam the door shut… Sigh… who knew attitude started so young?!

    And yay for nudity – beats dealing with little girls who don’t want help on the potty, but insist on wearing favourite dresses that get covered in pee because they don’t pull them up out of the way!

  12. Jessie says:

    I’m jealous! Our 3 year old has ASD and still doesn’t get the concept. Pampers owes me shares or something.

    • Hofmama says:

      There’s hope! I was pretty resigned to sending my now four year old with ASD to kindergarten in diapers…then one day a couple of months ago, he walked in while I was brushing my teeth, hopped up on the toilet, did his business, and hasn’t worn a diaper since. Wipes, washes hands, everything.

      • Jessie says:

        That would be amazing! We’re expecting our second baby any day now and nappies are expensive haha. We’re trying a new trick the speech therapist taught us about explaining it in steps with photos so hopefully that will help!

  13. Kel says:

    I remember the first time I had diarrhea on the toilet. I told my mom the weirdest thing had happened, I’d peed out of my bottom and it smelled bad. And then she declared I was sick and wouldn’t let me play in the sprinkler. Sigh.

  14. Nicole says:

    I love that you used “Oh Crap, Potty Training” . . . we did too and it worked like a charm! It was seriously AWESOME :-) Little man was completely potty trained at 22 months old without any fuss. So easy. People thought we were nuts, but it worked!

    . . . and I think it’s hysterical that Crappy Baby wants his privacy. My little guy does too, but only when he poops. He doesn’t care if he’s peeing, but pooping he always screams “No, mamma- OUT!!!” <— I've actually been working with him to be nicer about it and ask me to "momma please out" which is only sorta working. He forgets when he's in desperation mode- lol

    • Amanda says:

      We used “Oh, Crap…” as well. Done at 26 months. He also insists that I leave for when he poos, although I have to stay close by to prevent him doing a naked, unwiped runner!

      • Jenn says:

        My daughter will be 3 in October and potty training is my worst nightmare come to life …is it worth my while to purchase? Coz if I hear one more person say “it’ll happen” “she’ll get there” I might flip my shit I need some direction and if this book will help in the slightest I’m game

        • Brook says:

          Good lord, I agree. My little guy is only 19 months and people harass me about it already. No thank you, I have a cute, fluffy, cloth diaper locking that junk in there so we’re able to take road trips and in general live without fear. From what I understand potty training is the work of the devil.

          • S says:

            It’s the work for an angel, and needs the patience of a saint.

            Depending on the kid.

            If the kid has learned to poop standing up (as my nephew did) then sitting down would be a new habit to learn. (He is 12 now, and successfully toilets ;-)

            As far as I can tell, when a kid is developed enough to know when they are going to poo or pee, then they can decide whether they want to keep using nappies, or the commode. And it’s better when it is their stress-free decision because then they are more motivated to learn/keep to the habit.

            icbw.

        • Happy says:

          The book was definitely well worth it for us. She also has (what is now) a moderated discussion board for exchanging ideas and just venting. She specifically addresses previous attempts/failures so there is likely to be something in there that’s really helpful to you.

  15. Alli says:

    We have the toilet seat potty seat too, and I love it! My parents got it *for my birthday* lol. I had to remind them that I was turning 33, not 3. But my boys love it.
    And my guys love wearing undies backward for the same reason. But then I hear, “Mooooommmmyy! My BUTT hurts!!” whenever we’re in public. Classy.

    • amber says:

      Yeah, wearing them backwards does create a sort of thong effect sometimes. Hilarious that you got a toilet seat for your birthday!

      • Abby P says:

        Why in the hell do they put the pictures on the BACK anyway?? I made my son put them on correctly for preschool though, I was afraid they would think I didn’t know how to dress my child.

  16. Mary Beth says:

    awesome!!!! i’m hoping my little baby will be pt’d soon!! i laughed out loud at ‘poop water’! i love it!! why is it not always called that???

  17. annie says:

    My son wore his undies backwards at first too! Why don’t they make em with pictures on the front?? (Marketing idea?!?!) I could always tell my daughter “the picture goes on your bellybutton” so she would put them on correctly!

    • Christina L. says:

      Why oh why are the cool pictures on the back? Boy still wearing them backwards.

    • Robyn says:

      That’s weird! The pictures are always on the front in the UK! A shame really as I think the ‘thong effect’ would be hilarious! I’m a recent convert to your blog and it makes me laugh out loud! Love it!

  18. Sara says:

    Thanks for the recommendation on the potty training site. We’re about a year away from it here but that site/book/person sounds like my general philosophy about it so I bookmarked it for later.

  19. Dawn says:

    Poop water is classic, but “Go to the kitchen and make me some privacy” just about made me have an accident of my own! Too funny…I had to do that silent laugh with tears rolling down my face so I didn’t wake up my crappy toddler in the next room.

  20. Brandi says:

    OMG I am dying here! Poop Water!! LOL I think this is a way better (and less disgusting) description that what my hubby calls it, not around the kids thankfully, but still… he refers to it as either an a$$ explosion or a$$ juice… isn’t that a lovely visual!

    Congrats on being diaper free! That was the best day EVER in our house =)

  21. Lindsay says:

    Wait. PLEASE explain the wet tissue over the sensor trick. My daughter is potty trained, and she SCREAMS every single time those toilets flush. People probably think I’m throwing her in it or something.

  22. Ginny says:

    I am gearing up to start potty training my own “crappy baby” in the next week or so. Thanks for another timely post! Love the drawing, esp the awesome green socks. :)

  23. Leigh says:

    Congrats Crappy Baby!

  24. Karissa says:

    Yay for being potty trained! In the middle of that with my own Crappy Baby. I may have to pick up that book, as it’s not going well. I waited until she wanted to, but we still are having issues. Also, maybe not the funniest or happiest post, but I have been wondering how Wendy is doing.

  25. I don’t even HAVE children and I just about fall over laughing reading your posts. Thanks for always giving me a laugh!

  26. Liz says:

    Bwahahahhaha, I laughed so much at this. My hubby was like “what is going on, you sound like Mutley”

  27. James says:

    My kids call it “water poo.”

  28. Franziska Schell says:

    Congrats to Crappy Baby :)

    My elder son (3 yrs) just potty-trained himself. Still with some accidents, but it works out pretty well.
    I just had to laugh about the “poop water”. My son named it “gravy poop” – as opposite to “sausage poop” that eventually “sticks”.

  29. Pri. says:

    I had to laugh about the poop water, when I moved to US I didn’t know any English so I was trying to say diarrhea but I couldn’t remember the word so I just said “liquid poop” until today my family makes fun of me , “what is it ? liquid poop?” haha, anyways I’ve been following your blog since it was born :) lots of good laugh!

  30. Chantal says:

    Ok now I need to know…at what age did you all start your kids potty training? My son is almost 20 months old, and we bought a potty and have tried to train casually, but he isn’t great at sitting still. No sure if he is too young? Or maybe I need to do something differently?

    • Nikki says:

      Both my older kids started at about 2 1/2. Every kid is different so just listen to your kiddo and follow his/her ques. Some are ready at 20 months other not until 4. But most kids potty train by 3ish.

    • Amanda says:

      Check out the Oh Crap! Potty Taining. It incorporates stages of child development, which I love. On the whole, she says 20-30 months is best, but you’re also looking for developmental cues that she explains (not necessarily what you’d think they are).

    • S says:

      Think about when you need a crap. Do you go instantly, or wait until you are relaxed, or divert yourself with reading material?

      Your son is still learning about his body, I guess, and you may need to teach him how to understand the signals from his body as well as to communicate with it.

      Fwiw I think people crap best when they are stress-free.

    • samantha says:

      Try at about 2 years. if that doesnt work maybe at 2 1/2

  31. Pami says:

    My daughter woke up two weeks ago and decided she wanted to start wearing big girl panties. (This is momentous because even just the day before, trying to get her to change her pull-ups was cause for screaming and chasing.)

    Our biggest challenge isn’t a fear of public toilets but rather sitting there for thirty minutes to talk about how dirty the stall is, or outlining the process of getting her undressed, or what color the paint is, or anything but actually going potty. I think I’m going to have to invest in one of those portable training seats just so I don’t have to look at the disgusting toilet and floor while she’s clinging to my neck for dear life during these enlightening discussions! :)

    • Robonanny says:

      I carried a Potette for my son while I was toilet training him… it was awesome for those moments when you’re in a park and miles from public loos which may or may not be open!

  32. Andrea says:

    Although it does sound somewhat self-explanatory, I’ve never heard of the post-it trick or the wet tissue trick. Do they just involve placing something over the sensor?

    • amber says:

      Yep, a post-it over the sensor or a wet towel/toilet paper will stick on it so you don’t have to keep holding your hand over it.

  33. Nikki says:

    Yay Crappy Baby! Congrats on having another one potty trained.

    But I do think you should draw him in froggy rain boots every time. (I am assuming that is what they were only b/c one of my kids had a pair like that and I loved them more than my child. Life it to short not to wear froggy rain boots!)

  34. Megan says:

    Poop water! Bwahahahahaha!!!!

  35. christa says:

    so how does one do the oh crap method when the entire apartment is carpeted? lol

  36. Chantal says:

    Oh, and of course, laughed SO hard when I read this! Poop water! That is classic! Love your posts! I tell everyone about them! Keep em coming!! :D

  37. Meg says:

    Way to go Crappy Baby!!! My own crappy kids are now in their teens and most days still kinda crappy. The boy still can’t hit the toilet on a good day.

    • JillyBean says:

      This is why I told my husband before we got married that cleaning the bathroom is the man’s job. We may have more stuff laying around, but it’s their hair, tooth paste messes, toilet missing, etc that needs to be cleaned! Right? lol

  38. Lisa says:

    I’m in the potty training process right now, some days are better than others. I have to agree about the public toilets, and the floor being gross. Who knows what kind of nastiness is growing down there! Mine will go on the toilet but I have to hold his hands up so he doesn’t touch everything in sight! He hates the flushing though, he thinks it’s “too woud!” and puts his hands over his ears every time! He is also under the impression that he has to strip down to just his shirt every time he needs to go.

  39. Sarah says:

    This was great! And I also agree about Oh Crap. Potty Training making it almost too easy. Yay for Jamie, and yay for you sponsoring her on your site so we can all learn about way cool things while cracking up at how dead-on your illustrations are for life with kids!!

  40. Jen W says:

    OMG – the dark little stain on the back of his underwear after the poop water accident had me cracking up!!! Amber, you are hysterical :) “Poop water” is very creative; my daughter has always called diarrhea “liquid poop”. Classy.

  41. Enid says:

    Congrats! We had potty chairs (we have 1.5 baths) but K. prefers to use the toilet now, so we gave them to Nana for when her other grandkids visit. When she needs to poop the rims of her eyelids turn red and she asks for privacy. So cute!

    Now we just use pullups for overnight, and even those are sometimes dry. We’ll drop them eventually.

  42. Lisa Lutes says:

    My oldest daughter has been potty trained for about 2 weeks now. The other day she stripped completely naked including her socks and then rolled around on a filthy public restroom floor. Today she has ‘poop water’. I do not see this as a co-incidence.

    • Lacey S says:

      :( Yah… probably not a coincidence :(
      My son and I have swim class every Tues and Thurs evenings, and afterwards we change in one of the family bathrooms – wonderful little rooms with a shower, changing table, bench, toilet and sink, all in one room with a locking door. Brilliant idea… except for the naked, laughing toddler running everywhere after the shower in what amounts to a very large bathroom while I’m frantically trying to at least get shoes on him… usually while he’s dribbling pee :(

      • Lacey S says:

        Oh! And where I was going with that story!! He gets diarrhea (or at least loose stools) nearly every Weds and Friday…. *twitches*

        • Briony says:

          Ha ha Lacey, I do that all the time launch into a long story and forget why/what the punch line was. Such a mum w small children habit.

          Today my crappy boy had poop water. I sometimes call it ‘tummy ache poo’ which I learnt from my sister/nephews, but my boy said we had to wait for another splodge. We think the guilty culprit might have been the ‘spicy chicken’ at my sister in laws. But can’t complain as she looked after my 2 overnight so I could go to my exhibition opening, despite having 4 other children over plus her own 2, what a star.

          My crappy boy also wants to be left in peace, which is unfortunate as my crappy baby is transfixed by him going and always wants to watch “take him away mummy”. Last week my crappy baby put his hand in crappy boys stream of pee, nice!

  43. Kelly says:

    Poop water is awesome! My daughter named her diarrhea “poop soup” as in, “uh oh mom, my stomach hurts. I must have some poop soup cookin in there…” Heeeeeeee! Love it :)

  44. Amber says:

    My son named the Big D – Poop Juice!

  45. JeDiMa says:

    My boys call it ‘the sqiurts’! Potty training the 2nd time around is easier.

  46. sally says:

    hoooray for potty training- that is awesome- good to hear. he sounds exactly like my son- HATES auto-flush toilets (will turn around and walk out of the bathroom if he sees one-it’s the noise, mostly). and even though he’s been ‘trained’ for a year and a half.. he still takes OFF his pants and underwear every time he goes. he puts on a fresh pair of underwear every time he goes to the bathroom. I’ve given up tryin to explain to him that is not necessary.

  47. Rachel says:

    Poop water? We have ‘spray parps’ – gross!

  48. Jennifer says:

    Love the “poop water”. My daughter, at about 3 1/2, had a bit of a similar accident and told me, “Mommy, I threw up in my underwear!”

    Nice.

    And yay for PT! Hoping my 2 yo gets with the program soon.

  49. Jessica says:

    I, too, am an Oh Crap! Potty Training devotee – I actually found her through your site. I’m sure my friends think I’m getting paid to shill for Jamie’s book, but I’m not. It just worked for my little boy – no drama, no power struggles, no tears (his or mine) – so different from my experience with his older sister. Of course, while I was singing the book’s praises to someone last week, my son also managed to have an accident (which are fortunately rare).

  50. Niki says:

    Awesome. In our house we have soupy poopy. (Not currently, though;)

  51. Kim says:

    Why do some kids like to chat while they poop?! My mom was visiting a month ago and the night before she left, my 3 yr old was pooping on the potty and talking to my mother. My mom finally tried to get away (because my 3 yr old has the most foul ass ever) and Hayden said “Mae Mae! Wait!” *pause while her face turned red* and then, in the most poop-pushing strained voice EVER says “I LOOOOOOOOOOVE YOUUUUUUUUUU”

    Class. My family REEKS of it.

  52. RC says:

    My daughter came up with “soupy poopies” at that age. You’d better believe that one stuck around, lol!

  53. Julie says:

    My youngest son had to be naked at first, too! Hilarious!

  54. Valerie says:

    My biggest problem with our first…she found public bathrooms facinating. So every time we went out she would say she needed to go potty….even if she didn’t. This made mommy…annoyed (to put it mildly) since I do NOT find public bathrooms facinating. Horrifying would be a better description.

    • Carrie says:

      My son went through that stage. I got very good at immediately looking for the restroom signs upon entering any building, because I knew that any second he was going to claim he needed to go…even if it had only been 10 minutes since leaving a different store. My Mom referred to it as “marking territory.”

  55. Melissa says:

    My niece calls it “angry poop.” it always seems very appropriate.

  56. Carolyn says:

    Congrats on being done with diapers! My almost 4 y.o. daughter potty trained herself in January. Unfortunately, she still isn’t wiping her own ass. I would give anything to not have to wipe anyone else’s ass but my own. When that day comes, I am going to do some serious celebrating. Margaritas will be involved.

    • amber says:

      Margaritas, yes. We’ll also get a dog as soon as I’m not wiping the ass of anyone else. Gotta keep my poop officer job somehow.

    • helen says:

      My lad is 7. He wipes his bum but the reverses out of the loo shouting is it clean. I have to ‘ inspect’ it before he’ll pull his undies up!

  57. Kim says:

    I now come to realize that my daughter is truly strange… (she’s a teenager now). Between my mom (we did like to hang out at her house a lot) and daughter’s 2 yr old daycare class, I honestly do Not remember potty-training her. At all. Her teacher had that whole class trained in 2 weeks. I just remember one day I dropped her off at daycare in a diaper (because we had an hour commute and that’s a long time) and her teacher asked me why I had a diaper on her. Then she said well Don’t! She’s potty trained now! And that was it. Maybe 3 accidents after that. Maybe.

    She’s just strange…. lol (she still is – she’s 16, says she’s glad I’m her mom instead of my super-rich brother or sister (I’m poor) because we have so much fun together, does all her homework, gets good grades and works so hard) She has her teen moments but overall just such a great kid…

  58. Daniele says:

    What– no potty party?!? LOL

  59. Erica says:

    LOL my 2 1/2 yr old has potty trained over the last few weeks. He loves his privacy, he says: “Mama, you be right back?” because he wants me to leave him alone to poop. He also feels the need to kick off his shoes, underwear and shorts every. single. time. he goes. *sigh* LOL All 3 of mine have been very different experiences, the baby being male while the other 2 are female was definitely the biggest but overall he’s been super easy (thank goodness).

  60. Sarah S says:

    Poop water, I love it!!! We also potty trained a la Oh Crap! and it really did make potty training a piece of cake, or at least a piece of cake to what I’ve heard it could be like.

  61. Amy says:

    Love the privacy mention, my daughter always tell sme “mom close te door I need my Piracy” hahahaha

  62. Krystal says:

    Poop water! Ha! My husband will love that, he’s always looking for new words for poop to teach our daughter.

    http://letterstoaubrey170672.blogspot.com/

  63. Kendra says:

    Our big potty training mishap was with my 2nd son. My boys are only a year apart, so my 2nd took cues from my 1st on potty training and trained relatively early. I was in the kitchen and the boys were in the family room, wearing only their cute Underoos because they refuse to wear clothes at home. I’ll take it…at least they wear them without complaint in public. They had recently watched “Cars 2″ and were using their huge air craft carrier toy as on oil rig from the beginning of the movie. I walked in to check on them and saw that the entire surface of the air craft carrier was wet. I puzzled. Then I noticed that son #2 was now naked. He had peed on the air craft carrier because they “needed it wet for their Cars toys to slip around in.” I was horrified! Then I had to turn around and laugh so they wouldn’t see me. Cleaning the mess ended all laughter though.

    • S says:

      Hmmm. I wouldn’t class it as a mishap. Sheer ingenuity of the son who thought of using the resources available to enhance their play.

      At least they’re cute :-)

  64. SarahO. says:

    “Diaweea”, as in “diawheeeeeeaaaaaaaa”. Especially in public. Specially especially in restaurants.

  65. Molly says:

    My brother and I used to call diarrhea “Blasty Poops” because, well, they were just that.

    I can’t wait to go through the experience of potty training my daughter and all it entails, lol. Thanks for your great blog!

  66. Dianna says:

    Congrats crappy family!

    Laughing so hard. Can’t wait til mine is potty trained. I’m sure I’ll have loads of stories too. Scary that I’m looking forward to even the bad ones. Although I’m secretly hoping it’ll be quick and fast :)

  67. Patti says:

    I’m rolling from this post and the comments. My husband calls it ‘runny butt’ and it’s stuck around. We just went a round with that in my 2 year old. Goooooood tiiiiiiiiiiiiimes! not. Her wee little bottom was so sore, she couldn’t tell when it was leaking. We went through a fair few pairs of drawers those two days. She has girl and boy undies and she gets annoyed that the pics are on the back of the boy ones. I just tell her the tag goes on her bottom and it mostly works. Mostly. Sometimes if I let her dress herself without supervision, later at potty time I’ll find her with her underpants on sidewise. Which I didn’t even realise you could do. But yes, body in one leg hole, leg in the other leg hole, other leg in body hole. I just no words ya know.

  68. I’m with you on public restrooms. I think inside the stalls is where I have raised my voice the loudest with my son (okay, yell). It’s always the same, “Don’t touch that!” “Don’t touch that!” “Don’t touch that!” and “Don’t open that latch until Mommy’s done!”

  69. Beth says:

    LMAO!!! I love this! My son is the same way and thinks it makes more sense to have the picture on the underwear facing forward so he can see it. We have that potty combo seat too and they’re great!

  70. Lyndsey says:

    My son also feels the need to go completely naked to go to the bathroom. I let him go in on his own and he will come out naked. I now wonder if he got this from his father who, at times, does this because he says it was intense. I taught my son to sit on the toilet backwards so that his pee doesn’t slip through the crack of the toilet and seat. He also poops that way at times because his tiny hiney is too, well, tiny to fit nicely on the toilet seat. My issue is that he puts his hands on the toilet seat to hop on and does that in public toilets. I gotta be quick and put toilet paper down. My friend said she bought a kid toilet seat and kept that in a backpack wherever they go. Isn’t that gross though?

  71. TiffBlakey says:

    Poop water is called poop sauce around here. The first time my daughter call it that I immediately put it on Facebook. My husband was horrified. I found it hilarious.

  72. Sara says:

    He’ll start wearing his underwear forward once he realizes how cool the little hole in front is. At least, that’s what did it for my son :-)

  73. What is it with boys wanting to wear their underwear backwards? Keegan & I fight about which way his underwear goes at least twice a week. He’s been completely potty trained for a few months now but every once in a while there’s an accident. Like last week when he apparently thought I needed to mop the bathroom floor two nights in a row. He is kind of OCD so he thinks he needs to wash his hands BEFORE he goes to the bathroom & then the water sets him off so he pees all over his stool & the floor.

    Maybe I need to use “poop water” as a definition for diarrhea because most of the time when he goes poop he says, “LOOK I HAD DIARRHEA!!” If it’s just pellets he says it’s chicken nugget poop lol. I’m not sure if all little kids are this way but he has to jump up & look in the toilet right away to see what he did & anytime we’re changing his brother’s diaper & comment about him pooping he comes running yelling, “I want to see! I want to see the poop!”

    Boys….

    • Ali says:

      OMG! I am laughing so hard! I’m crying! Thanks for sharing.

    • Shawna says:

      My four-year-old daughter has the same obsession with checking out her baby brother’s poo and describing what she’s left behind in the toilet. I believe she’ll grow up to become a scatologist or something.

  74. I, too, am a fan of “poop water.” Sounds much more innocuous than its real name does…

  75. S. Jones says:

    Several years ago when she was little one of our daughters referred to her diarrhea as “squirty penguin poop”. Ever since, the entire family now refers to a having bout of diarrhea as having “SPP”.

  76. Also, while I failed miserably at potty training ALL 6 TIMES, I can gloat that my kids, as a rule, never poop in public toilets (like, say, when we are out to dinner). Probably for good reason

  77. helen says:

    Poop water is funny.
    I wish potty reusing had been easier for me with the second one but no. My lass couldn’t care less, had no desire to be clean and dry. Would happily sit in shitty wet pants and would giggle about it. She didn’t mind the smell or anything. Very hard to combat that! She’s finally got it ( she’s 5). Just have to tackle the night Weeing now!

  78. Erin says:

    LOVE “Oh Crap Potty Training”! Worked like a charm – literally 10 days diaper free and even goes (on her Elmo insert) on the public potties. So proud! “Oh Crap” is how I found your blog. Love it too and really looking forward to the book!

  79. Karrie says:

    My son was also a strip-down-to-do-my-business guy…and a privacy-seeker. My daughter on the other hand loves to give me a play-by-play and then stick her booty up in the air and wait for me to come wipe. (She is 4 — I probably should have mentioned that first…)

  80. Sarah says:

    A friends little girl has coined the term poo soup for diarrhoea

  81. stacy marie says:

    oh my gosh!!! i thought my kids were the only ones in the whole world that needed to be naked to use the toilet… yikes! :) also… my youngest one calls diarrhea poop water as well…. funny….
    lol… and reading through the comments… hahahahaaa!!! i don’t feel as if my kids are as weird as i once thought ;)

    • Natalie says:

      Totally not weird – my 2 boys (3 and 4) do that and wear their underwear backwards too. It’s always great to read how these weird things our kids do are so common though. Now if only I could get them to put their clothes back on after they use the toilet! : )

  82. Allison says:

    My 4-year-old calls it the “PoohPee’s” it started when he was sick and yelled in the middle of the night “Mommy I just peed pooh from my bumm….I pooh peed!!!!!”
    It was one of the those situations where I was laughing so hard at him but trying not to let him see me laugh because he was sick and felt like crap….it was too funny though. I kept running out of the room to wipe tears and spit laugh by myself.

  83. Holly says:

    So funny! Way to go Crappy Baby! Way to go Mom! Both of my boys (almost 5 and 3) ask me to let them have their privacy while they do their business, and I’m happy to let them. And then Lincoln, our little one tells me how many poops he has. Awesome. Usually he names them. :)

  84. Shelley West says:

    Awesome. I so want to tell someone to “go make me some privacy!” My child is in the “have to be totally naked” to use the potty stage right now too. Not good in public or at school.

  85. Colleen says:

    That toilet seat is awesome. I am so sick of cleaning out the potty chair. I also used Oh Crap – which I heard about on your site! I have a potty trained toddler now and it’s great. :)

  86. We don’t have any funny names for diarrhea in our house, but when my son thinks he has to poop and then realizes it was a false alarm he always says, “My butt changed to ok.”

  87. AnnaPK says:

    Oh Crap! potty Training rocks! My experience training the second was so different thanks to that eBook! Congrats on being diaper free! :)

  88. Sboss says:

    My older son calls them “fartsplashes.” I am pretty sure this qualifies him as “gifted.”

  89. Tiffany says:

    Kayden always said he “poopied a waterfall” and we laughed so hard we almost “peed our pants!”

  90. Erin says:

    Yep poop water is superb. And thanks for putting us onto Oh Crap Potty Training. Done and dusted in a day! Yes one day at home and then no more nappies. Yeeehar.

  91. Sally says:

    In our house we call dihorrea bum wees. So classy!

  92. Ali says:

    Poop water! So funny!!!! (Well, not if it’s happening to you!) We also used the little seat on top of the regular toilet seat. So much better than a potty chair! I love reading your blog. I laugh so hard & remember when my teenagers were little. Thank you!

  93. Lauren Foley says:

    Your son is not alone… my son (just turned 3) also has to be completely naked from the waist down to go potty. Especially in public- he ALWAYS wants to pee in the public restroom when we are out somewhere. Like he’s marking his territory or something! Oh, and he too wants to wear his underwear backwards, and for the same reason. They should put the cool pictures on the front instead of the back! I love your blog, btw. It’s comforting to know the stuff that happens to me on a daily basis also happens to someone else!

  94. Hannah says:

    died laughing at the froggy rain boots. my crappy baby lives in them too, 24/7.

  95. Julie says:

    So glad to hear my son isn’t the only one who wants to be completely naked to use the potty! We are pretty early in the training though, so I’m hoping he will outgrow it before we need to use public restrooms!

  96. Poop water has made my day. Reminds me of when my toddler threw up for the first time and said with confusion, “I coughed on the floor.” Thanks for toilet sensor tip…way better than me bending over awkwardly to hover my hand over it. Great post!

  97. Similar to your Wendy story, one of my girlfriends was asking how we had managed to potty train my younger son so quickly (he was 20 months at the time and had been potty trained for a while by then) and I told her the truth: we didn’t do a thing, he just wanted to use the toilet like his older brother and kept climbing up there. (I couldn’t take any credit, but I was totally willing to accept that he was a potty training genius all on his own.)
    And within 2 minutes of this conversation, he pooped his pants IN A RESTAURANT and it fell out onto the floor because he was wearing shorts and adorable baby boxers. I wonder if she thought I was deluded – it really was the only time ever happened! :)

  98. charlene fisher says:

    You are fabulous. I love your blog. It’s my go to when I’m having a crappy day. ;-) this post is particularly funny because my four year old daughter has a funny name for diarrhea too. She calls it the per poops because she says her hiney is peeing and its supposed to be pooping. Lol

  99. Janelle says:

    My three daughters, while very sweet and generally obedient, are also very stubborn. Each of them discovered at some point that “potty training” wasn’t something I could force and that they had complete control over whether they actually used the toilet or not. They each seemed to be immune to bribery even. With my 1st it was a desperate thing. I was sure I”d failed as a mother since at 3yo she had proved complete ability to use the toilet, then decided she wasn’t going to. Second daughter decided every time I offered a bribe that either she didntn’ like the item any more, or that she really should cut back on whatever it was (her words, seriously). The day after her fourth birthday (I’d long since given up trying to even bring the issue up) I suggested that now that she was 4 maybe she’d like to wear big girl underwear. She thought for a minute then said “okay!”. Pretty much accident free from that moment on. I thought youngest DD would be easy since she liked to mimic her sisters. But then she decided other things they were doing were more fun so she just always “forgot”. For her I got a batch of pebbles and a small glass. We called the little rocks “potty pebbles”. We put one rock in each time she successfully (no faking!) used the toilet. Then when the glass was filled up ALL THREE kids got a prize. Peer pressure FTW!!! Her sisters were the ones who chased her around and suggested 100 times a day that she go use the toilet. It was MUCH more successful than my identical suggestions. While we did have ages of diapers and pull-ups, at least we had very few accidents, even at nighttime.

  100. Christiana says:

    My older son was fully potty trained by 3 1/2 but for the 4 months leading up to that he would ONLY pee in the potty. I’m not sure who convinced him that pooping in the potty was evil and wrong, but somebody did…….and they suck.

    Flash forward to today, I was sooooooo excited when my 1 year old insisted (by screaming) that he wanted to watch big brother go potty. I thought, “Could this be an early interest in the potty?”
    HOPE. Nah, he just wanted to play with his brother’s poop. And who doesn’t?
    This time I think I’m just going to wait until the little one is 3 before I even begin.

  101. Emily (other one) says:

    Having too much fun to pee is a problem! In the words of my niece… (in a sad voice) “I have to pee everydays!”

  102. Pamela says:

    My daughter had diarrhea once when she was about 3 or 4. She came out from the toilet and told me her “bottom did a vomit”….. hahahahahahahahahahaha *gross*

  103. Sufia Naqvi says:

    My daughter had diarrhea and she called it water potty…

  104. Adele S says:

    We are well past the training stage but need to share this.
    Last week at a 5yo birthday party a little boy (aged 3) dropped his jeans and underpants in the middle of the entertainer’s magic show and proceeded to pee on the ground. This started a mini riot with all the 5yo’s running away shrieking.
    We parents were amused though, most of us were just grateful it wasn’t our son!

  105. Marilyn S says:

    Yukky but we called it Runny Grunny….

  106. Sonia K says:

    My son liked the “penis door” in his underwear, so he rarely put them on backwards.

  107. Lindsay Lopez says:

    We have the same Next Step potty seat! Love it! Also just ordered a little fold-up potty seat that comes w/ its own little bag, to take w/ us when we go out, so we don’t have to have the potty seat sticking up out of the diaper bag, hehe! :)

  108. Shawna says:

    My nieces call it “splatter poo,” and when I was student teaching, a fourth grade boy whispered to me when he came back from a bathroom trip that he had a “wet fart” in his underwear. When my sister was young (no older than third grade), she was so horrified that my mom might tell the school that she had diarrhea when she called her in sick that she told my mom to tell them she had “digestive issues.”

  109. Thx for “poop water” – I hate the word diarrhea. And the post it note idea – awesome! :) We have the froggers too – they’re great pirate boots, and storm trooper boots, and knight boots…

  110. Harmony says:

    haha! My husband has called it “water potty” since I met him! And I have to say this no stress potty training method is intriguing-my first experience was an absolute nightmare.

  111. Denise says:

    My son also insisted in wearing his underwear backwards. He insisted he wanted the picture “on front!”. Drive me nuts at the time, now I miss it. (He’s 7 now.)

  112. Linda Percy says:

    I had one grandchild who asked permission to go to the bathroom till she was five years old!

  113. Cameron says:

    Oh dear Lord. Poop water made me laugh so hard I DROOLED. I don’t think that’s ever happened before. So yes, I was drinking an Apple Ginger hard cider immediately before and it’s mouth-wateringly delicious and tart, but still. Laugh drool!

  114. Jackie says:

    I never really had a difficult time with potty training my children. Once the boy figured it out, with the help of watching other daycare kids doing it, he picked it up pretty quickly. My girl was way faster. I introduced her to the potty (just sitting on it while I ran bath water) really early. A couple months after she turned two we really started working on it and she got it in three days. A few weeks ago she decided she didn’t want to wear diapers at night and wears underwear to bed. No accidents.

  115. Sarah S. says:

    My kids ask for “priva-seed” when the want to be alone in the bathroom (which usually just means they want to cause trouble, since they only like to poop or pee when I am in attendance…)

  116. Catherine says:

    I was getting a bit desperate with my son – it seemed that all the other children in our circle had toilet-trained and he just wasn’t interested. Then, not long after he turned 3, he said he wanted to wear undies to daycare and we haven’t looked back! We have the occasional accident and still wears a nappy over night, but I’m thrilled!

    A young relative of my husband’s apparently said “mummy! I just vomited out my bum!”

    And in Australia, the undies have the pics on the front :-)

  117. Christy says:

    My two year old daughter says I have pee pee coming out of my hiney.

  118. Megan S says:

    Two years and my 4+yo son still wears his underwear backwards. For the past year, he complains about the ‘injie’ (in-gee) (for wedgie) that he keeps getting, but still won’t wear them properly. The wiping-his-own-bum is still a dilemma :)

  119. Heather C says:

    We call it “Hershey squirts” and my four year old pees his pants at his own potty party. At least he had plenty of new underpants to choose from.

  120. Nic says:

    CHAMPAGNE! the only thing for celebrating potty training success. The day my eldest did a poo in her potty, we went straight out with a friend to toast her success. (DISCLAIMER – no child drank alcohol, adults only)

  121. DianeMargaret says:

    Potty Party?!?
    You mean there’s ANOTHER gift getting occasion that I was unaware of?
    Seriously, what’s with the greed? I’d never even heard of a diaper party before getting pregnant!
    My husband’s friend just got pregnant and has ALREADY mentioned…a diaper party, a baby shower, and a meet and greet!!! She’s planning a MEET & GREET…she got that one from me…that was all the party I did. AND they all gave me crap over it! As in…that’s such a dumb idea, evetyone’s going to see the baby WAY before that!
    I showed them! I locked all the doors, disconnected the doorbell and bought a Rottweiler…that’s not true, I already had him! I just let him sleep on the steps…which I’d never let him do before (I’d had baby gates for YEARS before having a baby!!!).
    She didn’t even COME to my meet & greet (she was pissed that I really wouldn’t let anyone come over!) and has only started talking to me because (according to her MIL) she just wants to find out where I got MONARCHS to release at our daughter’s party!
    Everyone that didn’t come got really upset when they found that little surprise out! :)
    Needless to say, I will NOT be having a potty party! They’re already upset that our daughter picked out PIRATE undies (that’s my girl!!!). She kept looking at the boys pants & I figured it didn’t matter…who wants those sissy princesses when there are PIRATES to be had!
    I’m actually jealous, I’d love pirate panties! That would spark the romance, right? (okay, I can’t even type, I’m laughing too hard!) Ahoy there, matey! Hoist the mainsail! ROFLMBO!!!

  122. Emma porter says:

    I love your blogs. I just love love love them! I have 2 young children and I’m studying for an MBA so I barely have time to even have a cup of tea but I still manage to read this. Thanks Amber!

  123. Amanda Reed says:

    I was blessed with easy potty trainers, too.

  124. Crystal says:

    I laughed so hard at “poop water”. Then I was explaining your blog to my husband and my daughter overheard me. Five minutes later she picked up her brother and started carrying him around saying, “I have a crappy baby right here”.

  125. Nicka says:

    Happy for your potty training. I never did that with my kids. They just went eventually (their ages at the time of decision: 15 mos, 24 mos, 23 mos, 25 mos, 30 mos). They don’t need help…’cept the wiping part. :-)

    I just hold my hand on the auto-flush.

  126. Teresa says:

    Oh we’re in the throes of potty training this weekend and have given up for now after going 0 for 8. Thank you for making me smile about this subject. And potty training in a weekend? Bull (toddler) shit. And cloth diapers making for easier potty training? Also bullshit

  127. Raizy says:

    I am currently suffering from poop water. And morning sickness.it blows .

  128. Raizy says:

    I am currently suffering from poop water. And morning sickness. It blows

  129. Jenni says:

    you have no idea how lucky you all are – kids wearing undies – either way round – would be a minor miracle in our house. I usually discover the lack therof after they come home from school – and they just say – oops I forgot! really?? every day??

    • Christiana says:

      Hang in there! No one wears a diaper to college.

      Although some frat boys probably should. No offense if you’re a former frat boy….or married to one.

  130. Shanna says:

    Once again you have managed to make me laugh even after an extremely stressful day!! As always I look forward to your posts they almost always make me laugh to the point of tears, and lately I’ve started reading all the comments people leave too as I’ve discovered they are just as funny as your post. LOVE LOVE LOVE it I don’t know what I would do if you ever stopped. Thanks for the laughs.

  131. Staci says:

    LMAOOL… 2am… insomnia… so thx for this but I laughed so loud outloud that I think I cud have woken my cosleeping 2yo. How old is yr crappy baby?

  132. Ha ha, awesome! And I keep meaning to get one of those family toilet seats so maybe my littlest one can climb up on the stool and get on herself so I can have one less job in my life (putting her on the toilet whenever she needs to go).

  133. Kate says:

    After a week of dealing with Hurricane Isaac, you have no idea how hard I laughed. It was just so awesome to finally see all your post and laugh! Thank you!!!!

  134. Moji says:

    I’m always enjoying your posts and in this particular one, find it very accurate in describing how kids don’t want to stop for a bathroom break because they are having too much fun. This makes for accidents or OMG where’s the bathroom now episodes that drive the adults crazy.

  135. Gale says:

    I found Oh Crap! potty training through your site as well and it’s got to be one of the best parenting decisions I’ve made so far. We did the system over a weekend since we are both full-time working, so it meant we actually only took 2 days to potty train. Amazing. Apart from one poop accident at daycare that next week, and very few wee incidents at home, he was completely trained. We also hit the timing well though, because we could tell he was ready at a month short of 3 years old and that was when I heard about it. About a month after daytime training we left off the nappies at night and he has been completely dry day and night for about 3 months and counting. The Oh Crap! system made it sooooo easy, I cannot recommend it enough. I even bought the e-book before the price came down and I don’t regret it – it was worth every cent.

  136. Kerri says:

    Hahaha, “poop water”! Our oldest called it “yucky soup” and I just about died laughing (which is not really nice seeing as he didn’t feel well)!

  137. Melanie says:

    We have the same for our girl. The little in the big potty seat. Much easier and she feels like such a big girl because she’s using “mommy’s potty” (but she doesn’t know that I take the little potty off when I use it).
    lol also when she has to do number 2 on the potty what she says to me is “mommy can you get out of here” lol it’s hilarious what comes out of those little mouths.

  138. dreamyowl says:

    i love Crappy Baby’s hair in the “froggers” drawing; everyone wants me to cut my 2y old son’s long, curlyish hair but i’m resisting the pressure – it’s halfway down his back and so awesome …

  139. Deanna Faris says:

    What? People were actually rude to you about the diapers?? Haven’t they ever heard of artistic licence…or the Simpson’s those kids haven’t aged in about 30 years! geesh I seriously wonder where people get all the time! :) Keep drawing I love your stuff

  140. Hazel says:

    I love your posts. not brave enough to toilet train my youngest – it’s still winter here (so I have an excuse). Plus it was an excruciating pain in the bum experience (for me) from 17 months until 36 months with my eldest son. So no judgy and shit stuff from me. From my little experience in the matter – kids decide when they’re ready to use the toilet. and it’s great that your youngest one has got it now. yay! No more nappies for you :-) More time for your posts.

  141. Elecia says:

    ohmygod! poop water… too much! And “make me privacy”? too precious!

  142. Oma Mary-Margaret says:

    Love all the posts, soupy poopy… funny! My children never had a word for that. But, when my son was 3 1/2…. Grandma was visiting, she was brushing her teeth one day while he was sitting on the toilet, in the same bathroom. She said he was straining and groaning for a few minutes trying to have a B.M., then she heard a little “plop” in the toilet. My son looked up at Grandma with a big smile and said, “I knew that sucker was stuck up there somewhere!” Grandma had false teeth and said she almost swallowed them!

  143. april says:

    my 2 year old too has to get completly undressed while on the potty. one day after sitting on the potty for a realy long time and no potty happening i let her off, washed her hands and started putting potty stuff away. while i was cleaning water from sink area, she with no diaper or pull up on (oops) went to her big sisters room and peed on the carpet. go figure.

  144. Darcie says:

    Missed this post when it was fresh, but I was wondering if it was coming one day! Should say that I found Oh Crap here on your website and it was life changing. Thanks for introducing me to Jamie!!

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