Yesterday was a crazy day. My book came out! The day was finally here! Celebrate!
Only Crappy Papa wasn’t getting home until after 9:00PM so we had already agreed that any celebrations would take place this weekend instead. And of course I was insanely busy trying to answer emails and do interviews and all sorts of book stuff, you know, while taking care of the kids. We really didn’t plan this out very well. And then the toilet overflowed all over the bathroom floor. But that always happens. (Have I mentioned how much I hate our toilet?)
Fortunately, my MIL came over to watch the boys so I could breathe.
While I was upstairs working, I overheard the kids talking:
Awwwwww! They are making cards and decorations for me! To celebrate book day! So sweet and fun.
At one point, my MIL asked me if we have any string. I came downstairs and handed her a ball of yarn which I presumed was for my party decorations.
Then she asked:
The dog’s birthday? What?
Yep. That party they were planning?
It was for the dog.
For the dog’s pretend birthday.
Not only were they not planning a party for me, but they also had convinced my MIL that it really was the dog’s birthday. They blew up balloons, made decorations and gave him treats.
Of course I thought this was the most hilarious thing that could have happened.
On my day, on my special day…they threw a party for the dog. So perfect.
So after my MIL left, I decided I had to do something to celebrate today. And I have just the plan.
We’ll go to a bookstore to find my book for sale!
How cool will it be to see my own book on a shelf! And to buy my own book!
Unfortunately, they don’t exactly share my enthusiasm.
I try to explain how cool it is, involve them:
Crappy Baby is in, but Crappy Boy is still not excited.
So I tell him the rest of my plan. That we’re going to get:
Yay! Everyone is on board. This will be fun.
We get to the bookstore and after a few rides on the escalators we start the book search.
Crappy Boy wins the treasure hunt:
There it is, right there on display in the Humor section.
You know how it felt seeing it? It felt like everyone in the entire bookstore was watching us. Probably because they were. We were taking pictures and posing with the books and being silly and laughing.
So I grab a copy and tell the kids that we’re going to go buy it and then get ice cream.
Crappy Boy is confused.
He then adds, “That’s really weird that you’re going to buy it, Mama. Other people are supposed to buy it, not you. I don’t think this is right.”
He looks nervous, like we are going to get in trouble.
I reassure him that it is perfectly okay for me to buy my own book. “Come on, let’s go.”
So we get up to the checkout counter. I brace myself for what is going to happen next. What are the kids going to say this time? They always talk to checkout people and usually overshare. “I made a poop today that looked like a snail!”
Maybe they’ll point to themselves on the book cover and say, “That’s me!” and then the salesgirl will laugh until she notices the name on my debit card and then realizes that is really IS them. Then she’ll gush about how it is her favorite book in the whole world and will I please sign her copy that she has in her purse behind the counter? Then she’ll make an announcement on the loudspeaker that, “AUTHOR AMBER DUSICK IS IN THE BUILDING!” And hordes of people will come running with copies of the book to sign. There will be cameras. Probably a news crew or two.
Only the kids don’t say a word.
For the first time in the history of being in a store ever, they didn’t even say, “Hi! Do you want to know how old I am?” They always, always, always do.
This time? Silence. They just stood there like statues.
Frozen stiff from fear because they thought their mother was doing something illegal. Buying her own book.
As we walked through the parking lot, I wanted to wave the book around and yell, “Hey everyone, I wrote this book!”
But instead, I just said:
And off we went.
It was the perfect way to celebrate.
Or you could just celebrate my dog’s unbirthday instead.
I did celebrate online with all of you, your messages , comments and pictures made the day a blast! Seeing books arrive – with photos! – and hearing stories of you guys going into bookstores to find the book, that was truly amazing. Thank you for making the day so memorable!
By the way, my virtual blog tour has started and I’m so grateful that many generous bloggers are posting reviews and giveaways. I’ll be doing a book giveaway soon, but this week you can win copies from: Feisty Frugal & Fabulous, LetMeStartByStaying, 5 Minutes For Mom, Frugalista, ScaryMommy, How to Be A Dad and Strocel. I’ll share more as they go up! (Please let me know if I missed anyone, that is totally possible. I blame the dog, he’s tired out from his party.)