Marriage Candidates

So we’re in the family room and Crappy Boy suddenly says:

marry-abigail-or-minnie

Um. Okay sweetie.

I shared another story about him wanting to marry her about six months ago. And the same girl was featured in my Valentine’s Day post from last year. I’m surprised he has been this committed. Most relationships don’t last this long. Especially when you are six.

So this time I ask him why he wants to marry her specifically.

Why not one of his other friends?

He answers:

marry-abigail-or-minnie-1

Wow. That is not the answer I was expecting.

He continues:

marry-abigail-or-minnie-2

marry-abigail-or-minnie-3

Wow again.

So I say:

marry-abigail-or-minnie-6

Which is what I tend to say when I don’t really know what to say. I’m stalling.

I mean, who replaced my kid with a mature adult? Seriously, I had to go through a lot of lame relationships to reach this level of awareness.

How can he possibly be this insightful? This wise? What happened to my little boy?

Isn’t he only six?

My thoughts are interrupted by Crappy Boy who says:

marry-abigail-or-minnie-4

Yes…

marry-abigail-or-minnie-5

Um. Okay sweetie.

Minnie?

Minnie is a tiny chihuahua-mix dog.

Phew. He is still six.

 

 

————–

Minnie belongs to Sara, the woman who runs their natural horsemanship class. Even Crappy Baby rides! It is at Silver Horse Healing Ranch in Topanga Canyon. I highly, highly recommend the classes if you are in the Los Angeles area. 

 

This entry was posted in crappy pictures, friends, good stuff, marriage, six. Bookmark the permalink.

109 Responses to Marriage Candidates

  1. Jesica Lambertson says:

    Lol! That’s awesome! I still get the “mom, i want to marry you when I grow up.” Then, when I explain that i’m already married to daddy, i get the whole list of aunts, grandmas, female cousins, and then my 7 year old finally decides that he wants to marry my best friend’s daughter who is a 12 year old blonde ballerina. Way to aim high kid.

  2. kella says:

    whoa, LOL!

  3. Ms Burrows says:

    Ha ha …

    None of my girls have ever mentioned marriage yet. Just asked my 3 year old who she grows up, and she just frowned and said “nothing.” “No one is going to marry me. I don’t want to be a grown up!.” Now she’s asking for cereal.

  4. Chessie says:

    I’m so glad my son hasn’t decided who he is marrying yet. He’s only three! But he swears he is “fake married” to our neighbor’s daughter. hahaha

  5. Lindsey says:

    My daughter doesn’t care who she marries, she’s just getting married every day. Every pretty dress is her “wedding dress” and she’s always trying to marry the boys in our play group. She’ll come to me crying, “Mommy! I want to marry Seth but he keeps running away from me!” Yeah kid, we’ve all had that problem at one time or another.

  6. Jodi DeMay says:

    my oldest daughter wants to marry a boy in her class. Shes had a crush on him since Kindergarten and its hilarious how much she talks about him. I am friends with his mom and i always tell her.. well u better be ready to become relatives lol

    • Trena McCandless says:

      My best friend and I decided long ago that my 12yo son and her 12 yo daughter would be married. lol We attend the same church and, until this year, they attended the same school. At church they would always be sitting next to each other just chillin’.

      • Rachel Blackett says:

        My best friend and I were pregnant at the same time, she found out she was having a girl where as I didn’t find out at all. Throughout the whole -pregnancy she told me if I was having a boy they would get married later lol!! He is now 6 months old, and she is 5 months lol. The other day my friend blurted out “I decided they can’t get married now” When I asked her why her words exactly were “Well Amelia is a real fatty, where as Dylan is this skinny white guy… It would just look soooooo wrong” LOL!

        • Zoe Kunstenaar says:

          When my baby girl was about six months old, one of my best friends found out she was having a boy and said “Maybe they’ll get married!” so when we introduced them, we told them that they were engaged. Of course, she had it covered either way, since I actually have boy/girl twins…

          On the other hand, we have friends with lovely triplet girls, and we joke about my son having his hands full when he gets a little older! (All of these short people are still under 2)

  7. Amy says:

    one word: Hormones.

    When those come on board, all this “maturity” will disappear! Enjoy it while it lasts! Lol

  8. Shea says:

    Lmao! I haven’t had that conversation yet thank goodness.

  9. Lacey S says:

    Probably for the same reasons :D

  10. Tracy Beck says:

    Never say never though! I married my mom’s best friend’s son. I’m sure they joked about it the whole time we were growing up, only for it to become a reality.

  11. Jennifer says:

    Why is it that i can’t find share button today? Duhh..

  12. Elise says:

    I just asked my 3 year old if he knows what it means to be married he said “yes.” So I asked “what?” and he said “carried up”…

  13. Angee says:

    My daughter is 4.5 years old, and will tell perfect strangers she is marrying Wyatt. Only problem: Wyatt is our 105 lb. yellow lab. Crappy Boy is not alone.

  14. Kristin says:

    My middle daughter (6) currently insists that she is not going to get married because she is going to be a veterinarian. I tell her that she could certainly do both, but she looks at me like I am insane. LOL.

    • Jennifer says:

      Haha!! My 5 yr old daughter thinks the same thing.. only she wants to be a doctor. I told her she could do both, but that’s not possible to her.

      • michelle m says:

        I’ve had friends go to medical school… No, it’s not possible to do both, med school sucks all possible social out of life. Haha.

        • Fenny says:

          Nonononono! My Gorgeous Goddaughter is about to qualify as a doctor and her cousin is a vet. As I don’t have kids of my own, I’m definitely going to both of their weddings. I refuse to be done out of a couple of decent parties.

      • mrs wormwood says:

        My daughter (4) also wants to be a vet then a bs driver. She wants to marry the boy next door. Plus have 12 kids with a boy from nursery, who she wont marry, because she won’t have time.
        Product of a divorce I’m afraid.

    • Carmen says:

      She can do both. I am a vet, wife, and mother of a four year old boy and two year old girl. I even got married before I went to vet school. Several of my class mates were married with kids in school. I lost track of how many of the men had kids while we were in school, but woman in my class had her first kid while we were in our Junior year.

  15. Jennifer says:

    I was telling my kids today that my hubby and I will be going on a date and they will have a babysitter. My three year old told me that SHE wanted to go on a date, too. I said that she had to be a lot older and have a boyfriend. She then proudly stated that her five year old brother was her boyfriend, to which he shouted, “No I am NOT!” :)

  16. Heather says:

    When he was 4, my older son had 5 wives. My favorite was Michael Jackson, “cause him’s a girl so I marry him.” (This was when he passed away and was in the news)

  17. Gabrielle says:

    When my 4yo daughter said that she wanted to marry her 5yo cousin– our niece– she was rebuffed, “You can’t! Girls can’t marry girls and cousins can’t get married!”
    Then the conversation detoured through the super fun territory of explaining gay marriage, inbreeding, and reproductive assistance for gay couples. The kicker? We live in NC, and while two girls can’t get married (yet) it *is* completely legal for first cousins to be wed!

    • Amy says:

      good luck with that! Love it!

    • Shastine says:

      Snort! Yes, good to know consenting non-related adults cannot get married if they happen to have the same plumbing but that first cousins can as long as they have different plumbing. *sigh*

    • Shastine says:

      A million years ago when my daughter and my stepson were in kindergarten, I was volunteering in the classroom and it was snack time. Another mother and I were sitting with several of the kids, including my daughter and stepson and her son “Jake” (I actually don’t remember his name it’s been sooooo long). Just for reference, I am woman and I was ‘married’ to my stepson’s mother.

      My stepson to me: I love it when you put apricots in our snack.
      Me to my kids: Grandma keeps telling me how good they are for you guys.
      Jake’s Mom to me: I didn’t know Forrest was your son.
      Me to Jake’s Mom: I am his step Mom, his Mom and I are married.
      Jake to his Mom: So Forrest’s Mom and Cora’s Mom are married to the same man…..?
      Jake’s Mom to Jake: No honey, they’re married to each other. Usually men marry women and women marry men, but sometimes to men or two women get married.

      At this point, Jake *lights up*, you would have thought it was Christmas and 4th of July rolled into one.

      Jake to everyone in the room: When I grow up, I’m gonna marry Bruce!!!!

    • Annie says:

      We had this super fun conversation with my son the other day (he’s 3). We explained that my brother-in-law’s partner is NOT his brother, that they live together like mommy and daddy live together. He thought for a moment and said, “Like Woody and Buzz?” I think we are going to have issues with watching Toy Story in the future.

  18. Lauren says:

    That’s so stinkin’ cute! I hope he does grow up and marry her, just for the awesome story. Abigail, not Minnie!

  19. Patti says:

    Ahh, my 3 year old is marrying daddy when she grows up and nothing we say will sway her. For now at least. lol. But then she thinks you have to get married each time you want to have a baby, so she wants mummy and daddy to marry each other, again, so she can have another sibling. Her older sister is from his first marriage, so obviously, you have to get married for each kid, right?

    • Micki says:

      What amazing deduction she has! I’m really impressed. My daughter wanted to marry her daddy too. That ended during adolescence. She did however chase her brother’s best friend around the baseball field yelling “Spiros, I’m going to marry you.” They’ve now been living together for 5 years. I wish she would marry him already! LOL

  20. julie says:

    We have family friends that we’ve been close to since our older kids were babies. Last year, for S’s (their daughter) 4th birthday, my son wanted to draw her a picture card and write on it “I love you.” I helped him write it out and then he wanted to add “and N” who is another little girl he knows. I explained to him that he shouldn’t tell a girl he loves another girl, especially on her birthday. I’m glad he’s still playing the field, he’s going to make some woman very happy someday. He’s the coolest and most compassionate 4.5 year old on the planet.

  21. Lisa says:

    My 4 year old has a little boyfriend. Both have been telling everyone that they have been married for over a year now. I suppose she could do worse. I’d be glad to have him as a son in law in say 21 years!

  22. Steph says:

    Wow! I was confused for a second there too thinking he jumped from age 6 to 46 lol. Cute tho. I think it’d be amazingly awesome if he did end up dating and marrying Abigail … just think what stories you could pull up from here … and he would’ve known all along that she was his other half ;-)

  23. Karli says:

    I think this is my favorite entry ever. Previously, it was Crappy Boy licking stuff in the doctor’s office. This just barely beats that.

  24. LOL! My four year old daughter is always playing wedding with everything, and thinks that when you grow up you just automatically get married. Kind of like when you are old enough to get your drivers license, she must think there is a magical age where they hand you a marriage license? I wonder if there is a test you have to pass in her little world…

  25. Emily says:

    My 5 year old wrote a letter to Woody (Toy Story star) explaining her marriage plans for him and her. So there ya go. When she grows up, she will marry Woody.

  26. M.J. says:

    OMG Crappy Boy is so funny! He wants to marry a girl and tells you all these fantastic reasons why. THEN he returns to age six and says he wants to marry his teacher’s dog. Classic :)

  27. Shelley says:

    Hmmmm….chihuahuas aren’t that agreeable, so he may want to re-think that.

  28. The first time we talked about this, I told my son that when he’s all grown up, he will be the papa and have his own kids. So he decided that meant when his brother was all grown up, he could be the Mom! He also thought that my husband and I would be the kids, so I figured it was a step forward when he decided he wanted to marry me.

  29. Bethany says:

    I knew he was about to say something really funny after talking so reasonably. At first I was wondering who would name their kid Minnie, it’s a great name for a dog though, lol.

  30. Kristen says:

    Too funny. My son wanted to marry my best friend’s dog (a chihuahua, Chinese crested mix) when he was 6. They had a long distance ‘engagement’ for close to a year. LOL! We still joke about Dory being jilted.
    He also had a girl friend from kindergarten to 2nd grade. One night, in the car on the way home, he says “Mom, I don’t know what to do about Eva” Me “What do you mean?”
    “Well, we get in these fights ’cause she’s so bossy. So, I say I don’t want to play with you right now. And then she gets all upset, and I say, Fine, we can play. But, then, she’s STILL mad at me!”
    All I could do was shake my head and think, welcome to male/female dynamics. Since I’m sure her take was probably very different from his. ;)

  31. Jenny says:

    My daughter has been been consistently saying she would marry one particular boy friend for two solid years now. Just yesterday she drew a picture of the two of them and said it was her and her husband when they were grown up, and their son and daughter were asleep. She is five. Now I’m inspired to ask *why* she wants to marry him…

  32. Allyson says:

    My favorite overheard conversation ever took place between my son (then in kindergarten) and his good friend Noah.

    Noah: Jake, I’m gonna marry you.
    Jake: Well, ok, but we have to date first.

    I’d give anything to have that on video.

  33. Lori says:

    My oldest son, from age 2 1/2 would go up to girls and say “Hi, I’m J & I like girls. Specially pretty ones!” I’m a dance teacher & he would go up to my older dance girls & say that! He had a bunch of “girl friends” but he was always gonna marry mommy! It was fun when I married his step dad he walked me down the aisle & all three of us got married to become a family. So he says he’s already married to mom & step dad! And yes he was on the invite as someone getting married! It was all three of us becoming a family!

  34. Caroline says:

    My 6yo declared a few months ago that he knows what he wants to be when he grows up – a daddy. Next day he declared that he knows who the mummy will be as a particular girl at school wants to be a mummy so maybe they should have babies together!

    My nearly 3yo has set her sights a little higher, and is determined to marry a prince (but only because Flynn from Tangled is already taken lol)

    It’s actually scary how much thought they put into these matters lol

  35. Debbie says:

    I think that Minnie is visible in the bottom picture on the horse ranch website. Your “DIL” is quite petite!

  36. ErynBob says:

    A few years ago I presided over the “wedding” of my 5yo son to his 8yo cousin. She has always been, let’s say, theatrical. So, all the planning was a joy for her!

  37. Court says:

    My 3yo son woke up the other day, wandered into our room, and hopped into our bed. He gave me a hug and then kissed me and proudly proclaimed “Mama, I kissed you and now we are married!” When I asked what about daddy since I was already married to him, he said “sorry daddy, you snooze, you lose!”

    • Zoe Kunstenaar says:

      Astonishing the things kids say! My twins are not yet 2, and recently when they woke up an hour and a half earlier than usual and in a good mood, I turned to my husband and said “What in the world are they doing up at this hour?” Only to have my daughter promptly respond, “Baby Party!”

  38. Shastine says:

    A million years ago when my daughter and my stepson were in kindergarten, I was volunteering in the classroom and it was snack time. Another mother and I were sitting with several of the kids, including my daughter and stepson and her son “Jake” (I actually don’t remember his name it’s been sooooo long). Just for reference, I am woman and I was ‘married’ to my stepson’s mother.

    My stepson to me: I love it when you put apricots in our snack.
    Me to my kids: Grandma keeps telling me how good they are for you guys.
    Jake’s Mom to me: I didn’t know Forrest was your son.
    Me to Jake’s Mom: I am his step Mom, his Mom and I are married.
    Jake to his Mom: So Forrest’s Mom and Cora’s Mom are married to the same man…..?
    Jake’s Mom to Jake: No honey, they’re married to each other. Usually men marry women and women marry men, but sometimes to men or two women get married.

    At this point, Jake *lights up*, you would have thought it was Christmas and 4th of July rolled into one.

    Jake to everyone in the room: When I grow up, I’m gonna marry Bruce!!!!

  39. Woolies says:

    I think that is awesome that your kids are taking natural horsemanship classes. I used to teach kids riding (we have 2 horses). I stopped doing it. This might inspire me to start up again.
    Except I want a pony. I keep talking about getting a pony. There has been stubborness associated with this new idea. But, I digress….
    Tell Crappy Boy that he shouldn’t get married until he’s about 30. PLENTY of time. Whether it’s a chihuahua or a girl. Either way.

  40. heather says:

    Phew-my little boy is only 6 and not interested in the girls in his classes as other than friends…but the two girls he has classified as his girlfriends in the last 2 years-have been older girls (in their 20′s) with boyfriends… Their boyfriends are friends of my step-sons -22 and forever 18) I am a bit worried about that… when he was a little younger than that-I had to take him to my job at Mcdonalds to work for a few, and he started chatting with these three college girls-when I went to collect him-he didn’t want to leave-he scooted closer to them… Course they laughed-it’s cute when they are ages 2-8 lol

  41. Jennifer says:

    Kids say the darndest, right? My six-year-old asked me the other day if a boy could marry TWO girls. I said “Why are you asking me this?” and he said, “Because I want to marry both Christy AND Gabby.” Yikes.

    • Lana says:

      you can if you’re a orthodox Mormon

      • Jennifer J says:

        Another way of saying that is “ex-communicated Mormon”. There is only one “Mormon” church, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and they haven’t practiced poligamy in more than 100 years.

  42. Kristin says:

    Hahaha!!!! my 4 year old ALWAYS talks about how when she grows up she’s going to marry her little brother! She really doesn’t get it when I say you’re not allowed to marry your brother!

  43. katie says:

    This was great!! one of my 5 year old twins this week has been talking about marriage, too! First – “why can’t I have TWO wives when I grow up?” I told him we would talk about that one later. Then, today, he told me ” I am going to make a robot to do dishes so my wife won’t have to do them “.

  44. Amanda says:

    My 7 year old has a crush on an older woman. She’s nine. He tries to get her attention by saying things like, “Hey Ann, what’s up?” She generally ignores him, so he proceeds to throw sand in her hair until she screams, “Stop, French Fry!” I’m thinking it’s a possible match made in heaven. He swears someday they’ll be married.

  45. Mercy says:

    Sounded perfect until he decided on the dog. :)

  46. Aimee says:

    That’s hilarious. You and Crappy Papa must set some example for him to recognize the tenets of a good marriage. Maybe he and Abigail can get married and then adopt Minnie.

  47. Lana says:

    when I was 14 there was a certain 4 year old who insisted he was going to marry me when he grew up. As the years passed he maintained this position. I got married when he was 11 up til the day I was married he maintained a death glare at my poor now husband. When he turned 12 he looked at me and told me “only 6 more years to go!” despite my husband being right next to me with his arms around me and me holding my first son.
    He’s now 14 and still has a major crush on me two kids and 4 years of marriage to my hubby later. Sometimes it doesn’t go away.. :-/

  48. schaun says:

    I literrally cried when I read that. SO funny!!!! My 9 year old son had a “girlfriend” for 3 years that he planned to marry. He even told me how he would propose to her on a bridge. It was so darling. He also said he wanted both of them to live with us and that he would work with Daddy and she could stay here and do half the dishes with me!!!

  49. DeAnn says:

    My 6-year-old has never mentioned marriage. In fact, if you mention a girl, his only reply is, “I don’t want a girlfriend. I’m too busy hanging out with my buddies.”

  50. Melli says:

    My son, who is only 3, hasn’t mentioned marriage yet, but he has had a girlfriend for the past 12 months-the same one. He gets all coy when you mention her name.
    She has told her dad that AJ is her boyfriend and she loves him…..I am waiting for dad to come around and ask about his intentions. LOL.
    I hope they get married, it is a dear friends daughter. :-)

  51. My mom’s group has arranged marriages for all our kids. A lot of us have picked a spouse of each gender for our child, so we’re prepared in case of either orientation. We figure we’ll be great in-laws for each other, which is the biggest stress on a marriage anyway, right? ;)

  52. Angela says:

    my kids haven’t quite said they were going to marry anyone, but I just found out that mouse and racoon got married, then I was told it as last year. I missed the wedding :( (mouse and racoon are beanie baby type things)

  53. Kathleen says:

    I have 3 boys. Last year I had the unsettling experience of having to settle the argument between my then 6 year old and 4 year old over who was going to marry 6 year old “M-girl” from school. I thought I’d have to wait till at least middle school before running into that issue. Apparently not. :/ That battle went off and on for about 4 months, despite my insistence that a) neither of them were even allowed to date till they had a job anyway, & b) M-girl can very well decide for herself whom she’s going to marry. Then my 4 year old met a new girl at school. So now it’s settled. The older boy will marry “M-girl” and the younger boy will marry “E-girl.” Can’t wait till my youngest boy (currently 2) grows up enough to enter the fray. lol

  54. Keeley says:

    Typical guy, leaves a good quality girl for some stupid bitch…

  55. love the story…and, wow, dancing with horses??? why wasn’t i made aware of this when i lived in topanga canyon????

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  57. Vi says:

    when i was six my wiseass older sister asked me who i’d like to marry. i frowned a bit and said (for lack of better inspiration) “Probably Cornelius.” —> fellow sunday school mischief maker…
    the wiseass sister LAUGHED at me for picking such a silly little boy (to her anyway, i’m younger than him by a month).
    fastforward eighteen years and the handsome hunk is busy wooing me. I’m on the verge of falling for him, so Abigail, be warned!!!

    and you mama, do listen and take note when a six year old says something. he just might be serious!

  58. Vi says:

    when i was six my wiseass older sister asked me who i’d like to marry. i frowned a bit and said (for lack of better inspiration) “Probably Cornelius.” —> fellow sunday school mischief maker…
    the wiseass sister LAUGHED at me for picking such a silly little boy (to her anyway, i’m younger than him by a month).
    fastforward eighteen years and the handsome hunk is busy wooing me. I’m on the verge of falling for him, so Abigail, be warned!!!

    and mama just might want to take note when a six year old says something. he might surprise you a decade later :-)

    and you mama, do listen and take note when a six year old says something. he just might be serious!

  59. Ally says:

    Oh no, I just know I’m in for it now! My 20 month old son isn’t big enough to talk about marriage, but he is the biggest flirt I’ve ever seen! (He is most fascinated with blonde girls of any age. lol) I’m just imagining the future conversations that will happen…. haha

  60. My daughter came home from the first day of grade one and announced that a boy had asked her to marry him, but she didn’t know his name. When I pointed out that you should probably know someone’s name before you get married, she rolled her eyes and gave me her most exasperated, “I know, Mom!” But she never did tell me if she said yes.

  61. Pam says:

    Hah, I love this, :)!! Too cute!

  62. Sara says:

    I love that he wants to marry Minnie!

  63. Elisabeth says:

    My son made the statement that one of my friends was “cuter” than me … he didn’t say he wanted to marry her, but insisted he was in loooovvvveee with her :P She told him the age difference just wouldn’t work … she is 31 and he is only 5 … it’s happened a few more times since then … in love with every good looking girl he meets. Oi.

  64. Sue says:

    My son always said he was going to marry me (he’s 5) till his dad and I got married last year, now he wants to marry his baby sister “cause she’s just so beautiful” lol

  65. Carey says:

    This is awesome. My nephew wants to marry a friend’s dog but decided it might not work out because she wouldn’t be able to stand up on her hind feet long enough to kiss at the wedding. hahaha

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