the five toys I love (and also hate)

Here are five toys that I love. And also hate.

#1 – the prize ball (aka: a superball with a face on it)

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This isn't just any superball, this is what we affectionatly call "prize ball" because my son got it four years ago from the prize box at the doctor office. You know, that filthy treasure chest they let kids dig through at the end of appointments to spread germs more effectively. Because sometimes all the other germ spreading tactics fail.    

Anyway, the ball has two eyes. Which means it isn't just a ball. To my kids, it is a "guy" with hopes and dreams and personality. This is why I love it. I love that such a simple object can inspire such imagination. 

But this is why I hate it…

It is a superball.

A gentle toss causes it to bounce on a destructive and unpredictable trajectory of pain and suffering.  

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And after it calms down, it always rolls to the same hiding place:

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And I have to fish it out.

 

 

#2 – the sandbox

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We have a sandbox in our backyard. 

This is a beautiful thing, because it allows me to do this while they play in it:

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I get to lounge on a patio chair and just watch them. I watch them play happily together. They make sand pies and build castles and do all the wonderful things I did as a kid in my own sandbox. This is why I love it. 

And this is why I hate it…

Sand.

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The thing that sucks about a sandbox is that it is a box filled with sand. 

Sand that you have to eventually replace because… 

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it all winds up in your house. 

 

#3 – puzzles

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I love puzzles only because I'm supposed to love puzzles. They are good developmental toys. Good for fine motor skills and hand-eye coordination.

Whatever. They suck.

When they are missing pieces it bothers me. And they are always missing pieces.  

I put them out for the little guy and he eagerly takes all the pieces out.

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And then he walks away.

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I know he is a little too young. But I can't wait until he grows into puzzles. 

Why? Because when my eldest grew into puzzles he grew out of puzzles a month later. 

I'm so close to donating these I can taste it! And I'm sure immediately after donating them all the missing pieces will turn up. 

 

 

#4 – playdough

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and

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Oh wait, I almost forgot to explain why I love it. 

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Pretty much the same reasons as the sandbox. They play together. Nicely. And I don't have to. 

I think my source of hate for playdough is pretty self-explanatory, but just in case: 

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That oughta do it. 

 

#5 – books

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I know what you are thinking. How could she say she hates books? That is against the law!

Books aren't even toys! What is she thinking!?

My librarian friends (Hi, Allison!) are shifting uncomfortably in their seats right now. Relax. Breathe.

You'll see where I'm going with this…

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I love children's books. Like super-duper love them. Which is why I hate them. 

I can not get rid of any.

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Already at age two, my son follows the proper safety precautions of book selection.

You pull one out…

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And then quickly exit to avoid the book avalanche. 

And no matter how many books there are to choose from…

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he really only wants to read the same one over and over and over again anyway. 

 

What toys do you love/hate?

 

 

—————

Funniest_mom_blogOkay, my dears. This is my last post before the voting ends tomorrow. The last time I have to mention this contest thingy. (Aren't you happy? Me too.) 

You can still vote for this blog for Funniest Mom Blog.

(and no, I'm not in the lead, so yes, your votes matter! Thank you!) 

 

This entry was posted in crappy pictures, messy stuff, parenting, toys. Bookmark the permalink.

246 Responses to the five toys I love (and also hate)

  1. Jaime says:

    I am in total agreement with your choices :)

  2. Catherine S says:

    Legos. I hate Legos. Sharp pointy foot puncturers of death and destruction.

    • Rosa says:

      Yep. Legos. I love Legos! I played with them until… Well I still play whit them. There grate for the kids fine motor skills, hand eye coordination, and another bunch of stof.

      But… I HATE LEGOS!!! They always end up everywhere but were they shoul be. They are pointy and small and some are even transparent so, of course, you end up stepping on them.

      And… They are small and a choking hazard for my 10 month old.

  3. Hahahaaaaaaaaaa oh thank you for this! Because I hate play dough and missing pieces. I also hate legos and army men becauseh when I wake up in the middle of the night, stumbling into the bathroom – I always always always step on the one I neglected to pick up.

  4. Misty says:

    I love the “doctor” kit, because I get to lie down and close my eyes while my daughter makes me “all better.” But I hate it because she often pokes me in the eye by accident, or begins jamming a thermometer in my ear.

  5. Emily B says:

    Blocks – love because they amuse, they create, they’re fun to knock over. Hate because they’re inevitably under my bare foot at 2 am

  6. Amanda says:

    I have the same bouncy ball as you! I feel your pain.

    I especially LOVE the Little People Discovery City I bought from the consignment shop. It was Fisher Price’s first attempt at interactive music and sound. THERE IS NO VOLUME CONTROL. The music is catchy and wakes you up in the middle of the night because its in your dreams. BUT my little one LOVES the whole thing and it keeps him busy for hours…. sigh….

  7. Christina says:

    Yes to the Playdoh and messy books!!! Stuffed animals are also annoying! Once the toddler loses interest, you put them away, right? Nope. That just resparks the interest and you’re fishing them out for them again :S

  8. Emily says:

    My son beats me over the head with the book of choice, then has me read it until I’m ready to beat myself over the head with it…

    How about the obligatory annoying electronic toy from… uh… usually grandparents it seems that the kids love too much to get rid of, but will give you a headache every time?

  9. I hate balloons. Do I suck or what? Inevitably they spark fights/wresting matches/balloon-popping OR it still has enough helium to fly the hell away and that’s quite the drama.

    I guess a balloon isn’t really a toy tho . . . Transformers. I hate Transformers.

  10. Avery says:

    Motion-activated toys. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve jumped out of my skin on a late-night trip to the bathroom when out of the darkness and silence I hear: “Head! Shoulders, knees and toes… KNEES AND TOES!!”

  11. Angela says:

    The sandbox, yes! I HATE cleaning up after sand! I’ve found it works well to set the kids up in the sandbox late in the afternoon, just before my husband gets home. Then when they’re done, I’m busy cooking dinner, so he gets to clean them up!

  12. Kel says:

    Why I hate play-doh.. my daughter stuck enough of it up her nose (in day care) to require a visit to the ER. They had to stick a small tube up her nose, inflate it, and pull out the gooey stuff. Blue/green boogies. That’s why I hate play-doh.

  13. libby says:

    I totally agree!!

  14. Ingrid says:

    LOL!!! I’m right there with you! My 2 year old just started playing with play-doh and no matter how much I tell him not to mix the colors, as soon as I turn my head he mixes them. I don’t know that I’ll even buy him a sandbox, I hate dealing with the after math of playing in it. It usually ends up everywhere including in his hair and getting it out is a pain. My son has tight curls and hates when I wash his hair, so a sandbox is a no-no in my book. Btw, I love reading your blog :-)

  15. Amy says:

    I agree on all, except the sandbox. But that’s only because I don’t have one. May I add crayons. I love the pictures that my children draw for me, Hate that if I decide to color with them ( don’t laugh at me…it’s fun)every stinking crayon is broken or wore down to a nub that I can’t hold. Almost forgot I have girls so throw in barbie clothes & little pet shop.

  16. meganleiann says:

    Legos, Mr. Potato Head (and family), matchbox cars: all toys that my boys will play with very nicely for and hour. AN HOUR!!!! They are all horrible to clean up. I pay for that hour of peace.

  17. libby says:

    hahahah! I do the same thing!!

  18. Lauren says:

    Little toy cars! I just know one of these days I am going to step on one and roll across the floor to my death.

  19. Chris says:

    You’ve covered it in an earlier post. but…

    CRAYONS.

    I have lovely pieces of A3 card that the little angels can draw on. Instead, I have crayons on the floor, the wall, the bed, the driveway, the car… and some very beautiful blank pieces of paper are left.

    that, and TOY CARS. Little slippy slidey harbingers of twisted ankle DOOM and 11pm at night in the dark.

    Chris :)

  20. Francesca says:

    I hate missing pieces. Not just puzzle pieces but missing animals from the barn or the zoo. We have three different early-toddler toys that came with three little balls. Each of them only has two balls now. It drives me nuts– especially since I’m just at the stage where I’d maybe like to donate them.

    At my house the missing puzzle piece is probably in the living room air vent. The covers are wooden and pretty easy to lift out. One day I found several stacking rings and a couple toy trucks in the vent. (The rings had been missing for a couple months, which drives me crazy as well.)

  21. Andrea Olson says:

    I am so with you on the sand box! Not to mention the little surprises the neighbors cat leaves in it!

  22. Betsy says:

    The digital kids camera that actually takes pictures! Love it because it gives them a real camera that they take cute pictures with, but also can accidently drop, throw, etc. and it still works. HATE it because they like to take pictures of mommy…in the bathroom, coming out of the shower…see where I’m going with this!? :o)

  23. Lisa says:

    At the moment, the toy I hate is hummus. Oh hummus is not a toy you say? Tell that to my two year old who proceeded to stick both his hands in it and smear it all over my living room while I was reading this post. So yeah, I hate hummus.

    I guess I should add that I used to love it when it was merely a type of food.

  24. Jan says:

    here we have the problem with the books always… moon sand arrrgghhh (you can use it in the house mummy ) NO NO NO its just evil sand …Glitter why is everything girlie covered in Glitter everyone always has glitter somewhere they shouldnt .. and not forgetting teddies .. everywhere they reproduce I’m sure we didnt have that many they hide and jump out at you they cause wars .. they trip you on stairs ..and if they go MIA oh the stories Ive had to tell to prevent meltdown …

  25. Amber Dusick says:

    Ohhhh, that is a good one! We have plenty of those bathroom pictures. Sigh.

  26. Julie says:

    DITTO! When our youngest was born 14 months ago someone gave us some cute helium balloons which I tied to the porch. Horror of horrors, within a few hours they got loose and blew away WHILE THE BIG KIDS WERE WATCHING. They still, to this day, will get wistful and a little teary and mention how much they miss those balloons.

    Most hateful toys fall under the “things to step on at night” and so I’ll add hot wheels.

    I’m also losing my affection for Perler beads (those melt-together-with-the-iron tubes) since my kids will happily spend an hour designing something and far too often I’ve then destroyed it in route to the iron. Misery. And of course there are always at least a dozen on the floor that we don’t see but the baby finds immediately.

  27. Kristen says:

    The only toys I love to hate are my sons Thomas the Train toys. I want him to go out of this “train” thing and QUICK! This may lead to him being obsessed with legos but I am okay with that because it requires and promotes imagination, just not looking forward to stepping on them lol

  28. CJ says:

    oh yes, definately!

  29. I love my son’s train set — well, not the trains, because he sort of doesn’t give a rat’s patoot about trains, but he’ll spend half an hour stringing together track from one end of the house to the other while I do this: (insert that crappy picture of mama lying down while kids play).

    I don’t like ANY electronic noise-making toys, which is why the boy is OBSESSED with them, I’m sure.

  30. CJ says:

    SAME here, evil blocks. But they are my favourite!

  31. Do you have a dog? Did s/he at least apply it at licking height?

  32. Rebekah says:

    I’d like to add art supplies to this list. I love watching my girls be creative on paper….and then on tables, the floor, the couch, themselves, each other. Oh, and the other thing about books is not only are they haphazardly displayed on the bookshelf, they are prime targets for building paper airplanes. I don’t know about anyone else, but my girls LOVE to rip books up to use as paper or just to rip up.

    Love your blog!

  33. AshPal says:

    My MIL bought my 14 mo son THREE 200-count bags of mega blocks. That’s right! 600 blocks. I love them for their basic colors (“Gavin, this is RED. Say red.”) And because I kinda like building with him — well, it’s more like working to see how much I can stack before he tears it all down. I HATE that in the “mega blocks storage bins,” where there should be 600 blocks, there are only maybe 534. The rest are scattered all over my house in random combinations of BASIC COLORS and sometimes I just don’t feel like moving the refrigerator to ensure the entire collection is in one place.

  34. Kimberly says:

    My loving sister bought my 6 yr old daughter a crane game (because my daughter’s a gambling addict) for her birthday. It has SUPER loud, neurotic carnival-like music that gets faster and faster as time runs out, she barely wins anything (which usually results in tears), and it runs on little fake coins that I’m deathly afraid that my 2 yr old will think is yummy candy and choke on them.

  35. Darla says:

    Baby dolls.

    I love them because they are sweet and cute and smell good. Plus it is so precious to see my daughter hug, kiss, and mother her little precious babies.

    I hate them because 99% of the time I have 25 wet, naked babies staring up at me…..because “they needed a bath.”

  36. My two-year-old son isn’t very verbal yet, but one of his first 100 words was “golpin,” which is his version of “broken,” which describes every dang crayon we own.

  37. Angela Garrison says:

    What about those itty bitty Polly Pocket things! I have 5 year old twins who are all about the Polly Pockets right now. And they have a nuclear meltdown when a shoe goes missing! Really? A shoe that is the size of a pea? No way we are finding that in this house of 5 kids and a dog and a husband! Kiss it goodbye sisters. That’s the toy I hate and love because once they get a good Polly Pocket scenario going on, they are quiet for HOURS!

  38. CJ says:

    I LOVE books (unless my 3yr old has his friends over, who proceed to pull every single one out of the bookcase), Train tracks and blocks. I dont love playdough, i hate it, but i still have it and it is in a big box in a dark corner :P
    I love train tracks cause i can help my son build the track and then when it is done he can entertain himself for hours and hours and hours. I hate the train track as the trains are motorized and noisy and the entire living/dining area soon becomes consumed by little blue and brown track. I also hate the train tracks when his friends come over as no matter how many trains we have there are apparantly never enough to go around (hence they are often tucked away in my room when friends come to play). Blocks are fantastic. He can ammuse himself with them and i like to help build with him, but neverthe less they always end in a big destructive car knocking over the house, or a big ‘shakey shakey’ breaks the house (i live in Christchurch, NZ). Blocks also always end up under knees, feet etc etc…

  39. Jim W. says:

    Funny posting. I liked it.

  40. Kathi Cashion says:

    I hate crayons too! Especially those that find their way into my car, here in Texas, where it gets to be 190 degrees outside, hotter with the windows rolled up…sigh.

  41. Julie Bouf says:

    I think you have properly represented every mother everywhere.

  42. Amanda says:

    Angela, I just totally had to go through the house and picked up 5 different pairs of polly pocket shoes before I vacuumed!!

  43. Emma says:

    I love/hate my 14 month old son’s Giraffe toy ‘Wally.’ He loves it SO much, and as he doesn’t have a dummy (pacifier) it’s his comfort toy at bedtime, the only time he’s allowed it, his face lights up when he sees it and he squeezes it so tight, just melts my heart. Until I catch a wiff of it, he sucks on Wally at night, and it shouldn’t bother me because he sleeps 13+ hours every night, so who cares if his toy stinks even after being washed? I do. but just a little.

  44. AnnaPK says:

    We are the same way with books! I keep buying more even though we have too many and they are everywhere, falling dangerously on people.

    I love/hate the craft supplies. Oh they are so messy! I love what the kids make and do with them, but the mess!!

  45. Kathi -- Gabriel's mom says:

    Totally agree on all acccounts! And these “crappy pictures” look just like my house. Every day. (I have given up having a tidy living room and it’s amazingly freeing when you let go)

    I don’t hate any toys or books or writing instruments. It’s not that they don’t bother me when they are misused or strewn about the house – I just like wine a lot and that solves everything.

    Your blog lifts my spirits so much that maybe I don’t even need the wine any longer! :) Thank you for writing and for slipping into my mind and crafting my thoughts.

  46. Oh goodness. That picture of you with the broom, fishing the ball from under the couch? That’s me. Same with the sandbox (and the reasons for loving it are exactly the same too!).

    My son has this building set with a lot of block things and stick things and stuff (I forget what they are called). Love them because: He uses his imagination to build all sorts of things. Hate them: Because they have a billion pieces and hurt like H#@% to step on.

  47. Amanda says:

    Whose brillian idea was it to by my 2 year old a mud table???? Oh wait! That was mine. Bad bad idea, Mud here, mud there, mud everywhere and I seem to be missing kitchen bowls, and utensils????

    Why I love it? It keeps him so busy outside! Until he wants to bring mommy his creations.

  48. Beverley says:

    How wonderful!! I fell over your blog and have crashed into my reality. Enjoy the humour and the starck truth. Blinkin Fab!!

  49. Hot Wheels. LOL Of course, they can’t have/play with just one. No, no, more like 4 million. And with our hard wood floors, they can equal mini-skating boards. Ones that you never asked to ride during the early morning potty break. That’s IF your lucky to have them right side up, upside down, they are just as awful…I have BLED from them…:(

  50. Sara says:

    We can only vote once? That “other” blog doesn’t even make me chuckle, how can they be considered funnier?

  51. Mishka B says:

    at the top of my most-disliked list are the toys that well meaning family members buy for my kids. you know the toys with loud, annoying sound effects? the ones that don’t have an “off” button. i can’t throw them out, because i’m afraid of hurting someone’s feelings and no matter how many times i try to hide them, they inevitably turn up in the living room again. the sound of the winy, repetitive tune drives me bananas and it never stops!!

  52. jackie says:

    Mega Bloks are the worst!! For my son’s 12 month birthday, he recieved 250 of them. And I can account for about 195 of them. Until I start looking in my night stand. Under my bed. Behind the television. Between the couch cushions. In the pantry. And so on.

  53. Constance says:

    I think you should take the puzzle pieces out of the puzzle, before you give it to your youngest, maybe he’ll get into putting them in and then you can donate them more quickly

  54. Debbie says:

    I agree!

  55. Rach says:

    Sorry Amber, the site is STILL down for me grrrrrr

  56. Staci says:

    Shape sorting toys! Love what they teach, hate that we’re missing pieces to EVERY one that we have. Why DO we have so many different ones anyway? There are only so many shapes to be learned, and it isn’t like the pieces are interchangeable between the different sorters.

    Right this minute I am loving and hating a farm set that my daughter is quietly playing with. I just know that I’ll be finding the baby chewing on small choke hazards for weeks to come. *sigh*

  57. I’m beginning to loathe *all* toys at this point in time. We have two two-year-olds and one three year old. All that they seem to live for is to throw the toys/markers/crayons/puzzles/books/play doh etc. around the room until they have created a disaster. Then they stand at the gate and whine. For… something. I still haven’t figured it out because they have at least 36 hours worth of entertainment value sitting there in a heap on the floor! But they won’t actually *play* with the toys.

    Why did I waste all of that money?? I could have bought myself a Gucci bag instead!

  58. Jolene M. says:

    Barbie shoes & accessories have the same effect!

  59. cassandra says:

    I hate balloons and my children know it. They fight over them, “hit” each other with them. Then they fly to the highest point of my cathedral-like ceilings and I HAVE to get a ladder. And THEN…they pop. Grrr…

  60. Robin says:

    I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again: are you me?! Because we seem to have the same kids, or something.

    Also, I want to add to the list those LeapFrog magnet toys. You know, the airplane with the letters and so on? Well we have two of those things and I love them because the kids love them and they are educational. But I HATE them because the darned magnets are always all over the kitchen floor! Arg!

  61. Mellie says:

    The Fisher Price Dog!!! ARRRRGGGGGHHHH!

  62. Becky F says:

    I am in total agreement with the playdough! And I brilliantly decided “Hmm…this dosen’t seem to make enough of a mess…let’s get the Ice Cream Parlor!!! How fun (and it is!) and creative (and it is!) my child will be!” I have to use a wooden skewer to get it out of all the little nooks and crannies!
    Also, glitter. Enough said.

  63. Kika says:

    crayons in the car, priceless! until I needed to sell my car! We had to take out the backseat, bring it into the house, and iron the crayons out. You put an old rag over the crayon stain, iron over the rag to melt, and the rag will absorb it. repeat, repeat, and then use a toothbrush with a bit of soap to remove the color from the fabric. You need patience to do this, but it works

  64. Michelle says:

    Playdough because no matter WHAT precautions I take, it ALWAYS ends up on my carpet. Ever try getting that out of a carpet? Ugh!!!

  65. Anne-Marie says:

    Totally agree!

  66. Sarah says:

    colouring pens…I don’t think that really needs an explanation :-)

  67. Kathy says:

    Barbie Dolls! She is three and can not dress them, only undress in a slight fraction of the time it takes me to dress her.

  68. Heather says:

    Don’t Break the Ice. Love because it brings ridiculous amounts of joy to the child. Hate because it takes more time to set up by cramming those stupid plastic pieces of ice into the frame than it does for the child to smash it.

  69. Oh my gosh I just laughed so hard! I swear there’s a ghost in my house that enjoys hitting the button on those toys the instant I am halfway to the bathroom. Then, I no longer need to go to the bathroom, but have a puddle (or worse) to clean up! LOL!

  70. Alicia C. says:

    STUFFED ANIMALS!
    My kid plays with all of them. The times when he plays nice (sings songs, puts them to bed, feeds them pretend cookies, etc.) are wonderful, but only happen about 5% of the time. The other 95%? My oldest taught him that stuffed animals make the best balls. You can throw them at people and it doesn’t hurt. You can hurl them toward the shelf and knock down the 100 piece puzzle that mommy put up there because she was sick of picking it up, you can throw them over the baby gate and then yell and scream until someone goes and gets it for you… Oh, and they collect dust, food, and are impossible to clean. But, take just one from the collection and my kid knows it’s missing immediately. We then have an Amber Alert for Mr. Quackers!

  71. CathKane says:

    I love/hate sticker books… or any craft that my eldest has done at playgroup that involves sticking. He just loves to stick, and I love to watch him create his masterpieces… but once it’s finished he just can’t stop himself from ripping all the stickers off again… most of them end up in tiny pieces, all over the floor. I freak out about the baby eating them since the eldest’s best friend was taken to hospital to have a tiny foil christmas tree removed from between his vocal cords a couple of years back (the result of a craft session at childcare gone wrong). I don’t just hate stickers, I fear them.

  72. Skevy says:

    Loved all your choices! I have to add that I love/hate the ball pit balls. It’s similar to the sand box for us. I love the hours of entertainment, but hate the hours of clean up all over the house!

  73. Lara says:

    The playdough pictures are an exact replica of every time my boys play with it. Perfect!

  74. If it takes batteries or plugs into my computer – big thumbs-down with raspberries. Way to much friggin’ work for me – uh, I mean it must not require any imagination for the kids to play with it. Wink, wink.

  75. Alicia C. says:

    Hey! Thank you for solving my toy-hating problem. I like wine! Why did I never put the two together?! ;)

  76. Amber says:

    Anything pointy or noisy. I am little to no fun.

  77. Roccie says:

    Anything that can be used to squirt Momma from the bath tub.

  78. Sand is bad…yes bad….but whoever the genius was that came up with the sand AND water table….well I won’t say what I’d like to do with him. Because, you see, I was stupid enough to think this was an AWESOME summer time gift for my kids! Know what you get when you mix sand and water?? Yeah, because 4 kids are NOT going to leave the sand and water in their separate sides. I love that it will keep them occupied for hours on end! But oh the mess…sand sludge from here to there and in every single crack and orifice my 2 yr old twins contain! It =’s immediate bath/scrub time when they are finished! Ugh! Genius!

  79. Mellie says:

    Tip for sand – baby powder makes it come off their skin. Doesn’t help with the pockets, though. Or socks. Or hair.

    Puzzles – I put velcro on the pieces so they don’t come out as easy. (Mean Momma!)

    Toys that are too loud – why are the ALL too loud?? – I have been known to disassemble them and shove a cotton ball in the speaker. Works awesome, except for that time I accidentally broke the solder holding the wire in.

    I haven’t let my kiddos play with glitter yet, or as my brother-in-law calls it “Craft Herpes”.

  80. Leia says:

    You nailed most of my list. I have been trying to remember to turn this car my son has to off before bed. I don’t know how or who keeps making it go off in the middle of the night. Nothing like being woken up to the darn thing playing music and saying,”here we go!”. And the still asleep part of me wonders if I do get up will I find some ghost kid playing with it in the living room?

  81. Andi says:

    The playdough always starts out at the perfect consistency with such beautiful colors, and then it always ends up drier and that puke-greenish color with hairs in it. Sigh….

  82. Alicia C. says:

    My oldest is 13 now. I never, ever let him have those electronic noise-making toys. Now, whenever we’re in a store with a toy aisle, he is immediately attracted to those electronic baby toys. He’ll become engrossed in pushing the buttons over and over. I have to snap him out of his trance to get going! If I were you, I’d get at least one of those annoying toys for your kid – you don’t want him to grow up to be an electronic baby toy addict like my son! LOL

  83. Erma says:

    The puzzle and the books are the bane of my existence.

  84. Stephanie says:

    How about toys in general? I really hate them. There is no great way to organize and keep them together. No perfect way to make them look pretty. And I swear to god that the Magnetiles and the board games are mating at night because every day there is just more. stuff. STUFF! Everywhere.

  85. Paint. Its my pet love/hate. Do I need to explain why? Not to any parent I am sure.

  86. Owen says:

    Absolutely love this blog!!

    Thank you for picturing our house with such incredible clarity!

  87. i have to agree with the legos. LOVE legos. HATE legos….also perler beads, because she sits quietly and plays. then the cat joins her and i am picking up perler beads for a month. toys in general – all of ‘em. ‘cuz my kids (all three) are dumpers. that’s the “play” – just dumping them. and then walking away……it amazes me how much square footage can be covered in toys…….

  88. Jess says:

    So funny about the play doh. When my oldest was little he would not mix colors and would get mad at me when I mixed them even a tiny little bit. When it would finally dry up I would throw away cans that were still perfectly colored!

    My toddler’s ball toys ALWAYS roll under the couch or the fridge. I taught him to use a paint stir stick to fish them out himself. :)

  89. Di says:

    oh, that is one of my favorite!
    I love/hate beads! OK, not exactly a toy. My 7 yr old is fine with beading, but my almost 3 ???!!! Ugh! she ‘cooks’ them, ‘eats’ them, ‘throws them, and makes snowflakes….blah-blah. The result is I have to vacuum them from the floor, I am not picking them, this is the rule!

  90. Alexandra says:

    I put clear tape over where the sound comes out = very effective muffling!

  91. Alexandra says:

    I put clear tape over where the sound comes out = very effective muffling!

  92. Joy says:

    I agree with that I just got my own personal photo shoot while getting my eyebrows waxed. I’m just going to call this one a learning experience. (And remember to delete all photos after she is asleep.)

  93. Pippi says:

    OMG ..the bouncy ball part was so real for me! Recently, I was super excited to score a $1.99 bag FULL of those little super-bouncy balls.. :) ..sigh…well, better than finding cooked pasta in every corner I suppose!

  94. Dee says:

    Amber, I love/hate books too because my son goes through fifteen of them before bedtime and then I have to pick them all up again every night to start the process over the next night. For the same reason, I love/hate blocks because he will play with all of them and leave them on the floor when I’m walking in the dark before my bedtime. For once I would love to not trip over books or blocks at night.

  95. Laurie says:

    I’m also constantly trying to keep the lego kit pieces together and not lose any. I’ve tried all kind of organizational systems – none of which my 5 year olds have any interest in following. Oh, but when they try to put that Cars 2 lego project together again and they can’t find that one piece they need to complete it….

  96. Kristen says:

    So we have this Tigger book that when I bought it for my first child I thought was so cute and it was on sale and he loves Tigger so great. I didn’t think about the sound effects. This book has 3 sound effect buttons that were once cute too. I’m now on my 3rd child loving this book. I usually put it away, in a place I think they will never ever find it. I cringe when they do. But because it is a book and I love books, I don’t feel right about getting rid of it. (All noisy toys should be banned IMO)

  97. BobbiK says:

    What’s worse is when the batteries start going! “Heeeeaaaaddddss, Sssshhhhhooouulldddeeerrrss….”
    Or my cousin’s Big Bird toy that said, “I see you!” Hear that in slow motion at night and you won’t sleep for days!

  98. Emily says:

    Toys that I will not allow in the house (ever, at all): Play-Doh; magic markers; small bits of plastic crap (except for Legos, which are higher quality).

  99. hattiealicefranks@gmail.com says:

    This blog makes me feel less like a crappy mom. I am a grandma now but I did not let the kids play with play dough for just that reason. Sandbox – I would hose the kids down before entering the house (we live in Arizona). You are truly precious and clever to come up with all of these blog ideas. Don’t let anyone discourage
    your sparkling personality.

  100. Jak says:

    Have you ever tried the various tricks with white vinegar to get the smell out? Many people say it works better than soaps. If you do a quick google search of uses for vinegar in laundry there’s a bunch of information out there about it.

  101. Laurie says:

    Ours are mostly under the fridge…

  102. Sarah says:

    Oh I totally hear you on the puzzles. There is *always* a piece missing, and it is not always the same piece. It’s like conservation of mass – the puzzle cannot ever be complete.

    It totally pushes all my buttons.

  103. Jak says:

    Are they actually well-meaning? There’s a tradition among my family for the aunts and uncles to buy the noisiest, most obnoxious toy for their nieces and nephews.

  104. Heather says:

    The reason I hate the sandbox is that my freaking cat has apparently installed a little alarm in there that tells him when the lid is off. If I turn my head for one second, he is in there peeing. I think he saves it up just for the sandbox.

  105. Amanda Reed says:

    I hate all toys. I know. I suck.

    Toys have:
    little clothes that need changed, but my kids can’t do it themselves so they need me to and I can barely do it either, so they end up naked and neglected…

    or they have little hard animal legs that stick straight up hiding under a piece of innocent laundry so you step on it just right (especially on your way to the toilet in the dark)…

    or they make noise at the most inopportune times like the toy cell phone I shoved in my purse while cleaning out the van and it ends up getting pulled out during church and Pastor has just made a really great point and the room is hanging on his every word and then Cinderella yells, ‘Hello! I’m Cinderella! What are you doing today?’

    Yup.

  106. Amanda Reed says:

    I should probably add that my oldest daughter got a chicken dance elmo for her birthday the year she turned 3 (she is now almost 11). The day after she got the elmo, my husband stuck it on the top on the highest shelf in the house, and everyone promptly forgot he even existed. Thank God for high shelves. (Elmo wants to be chicken, Elmo wants to be a duck ♪♪♫♪♫♫ )

  107. Melody says:

    Hama beads… ARRGGGHHH! I love all the beautiful things kids can make with them, but then the beads get everywhere and when you work with 40 kids, that is a lot of beads. Plus a lot of, “Have you ironed my beads yet? Is it ready? Can I see it?” Following you around all day.

    Sorting boxes. Sure they are good for little hands to sort colours, shapes and like textures. They are not good for slight OCD tendencies! I can’t look at them after the kids get to them.

    I agree with books too. My little one likes to drop them around the house and then they become slipery traps for her to slide on later.

  108. Megan says:

    I think electronic toys get left out because there’s no “love” component from the parent side :D

  109. Megan says:

    I had an old care bear with a pull string from when I was a kid who did that, too. It was secret bear and he sounded like the ghost of a child molester after 20 years had gone by – “III prooomise III won’t telll” in that inexplicably deep voice…

  110. Lisa says:

    UUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH, my son got a balloon from his daycare provider for his 3rd birthday, and one day when I had my back turned he decided to take it outside. You see where this is going. He tripped on the top step and accidentally let his balloon go so all I hear from inside the house is “MY BALLOOOOOOOOON!” and come outside to see him sobbing on the steps with his balloon flying away. I was ready to drive him to the store and buy him a new balloon then and there.

  111. Cheri says:

    I had the same feelings about books. That’s when I found this wonderful idea! It works like a charm and my girls love it!

    http://mcgregormosers.blogspot.com/2011/08/mind-in-gutter.html

  112. Rahshell says:

    Wish I had thought about that 6 months ago when I traded in our SUV. My love/hate is the Wii, my 3 yr old played all day everyday at grandma’s house this summer, he asks me all day long if it’s time to play. Ugh, if it weren’t for Netflix I’d pack up the Wii til we moved!!

  113. Rahshell says:

    Half the letters were missing a few hours after we opened it at Christmas LOL I bet we’ll find them in his room when we do our final cleaning once we move out.

  114. Ryan says:

    I love my daughter’s shape sorter because even at the age of 7 months she had learnt how to reach in, pull a piece out and pull a face of such awe as only God could have done before when he created the Universe (Atheist here btw)!
    And I hate it because she delights in taking the sharp triangular pieces and wave them around triumphantly, usually smacking my teeth or gouging an eye in the process.
    This inevitably leads to me yelping, her crying and me trying to sooth her shocked tears through tears of my own agony.

  115. Liz says:

    Ditto on that. I checked it out and did not laugh once. Was not even “bookmark-worthy”. So wish I could vote again…

  116. Kim says:

    I have a doctor in the family as well LOL Love it, but hate pulling 7 bandaids off of my body.

  117. Anne-Marie says:

    Voted! No matter what happens with this contest, you’ll always have the funniest Mom blog!!

  118. Danielle M says:

    seriously…i’m with you.

    Especially on the play doh–which is why we call it
    “GREY DOH” in our house…it used to be pretty pastel colors but….alas…no more.

    *le sigh*

  119. JenGuest says:

    Soph loved the Little People farm quite obsessively and it was all well and good until the damn thing started mooing by itself all night long.

    You’d be going to the fridge to stare into it and see if there was anything good you sneak into your mouth (at 11pm of course) and from two rooms away there’d be this jolting MOOOOOOOO and you’d run away terrified.

    It still moos by itself 5 years later.

  120. Kris says:

    We have a sand/water table that some genius created, then some idiot bought it ( that would be me )because it looked like so much fun. My kids love it because the only better then sand is wet sand. Every where. Mixed up in the water half. Mixed in their hair. Mixed in their clothes. Mixed in her mouth. Pooped out in her diaper two days later ( long after I have forgotten about it) making me wonder ” WTF is that? Is she dying?” only to realize after a frantic call to the dr that she ate it.

  121. emily says:

    omg… how are you not in the lead?? This is unlawful!! Occupy Parents!!

    Seriously… I really hope you win. You deserve it. Your blogs Always make me laugh. :D

  122. Gretchen says:

    How about video games? My kids are (mostly) older and while I love that they will keep entertained, I hate listening to them. Specifically, “Super Smash Brothers Brawl” on the Wii. I love that all four (nearly 15, 13, 9.5 and 4.5) can and sometimes do play it together nicely, but oh, how I hate listening to it!

  123. Gretchen says:

    Really??? When I voted a couple days ago, “Crappy” was winning!

  124. ciria says:

    LEGOS!!!!

  125. kristin says:

    Ugh….hate balloons. Hate them. I don’t think we have ever had a good balloon experience. They cause the worst fights and the whole time I worry that someone will bite it.

  126. Layla says:

    Putting things away makes them interesting!

  127. I’m going to reiterate 2 already mentioned… Lego and paint.
    But otherwise I totally agree on every toy you have there :)
    And how did you find a picture of our bookshelf to draw it? LoL on the plus side of the bookshelf… My 6, almost 7yr old has decided its his job now to fix the books up and straighten out the book case. He does a pretty good job too, only I have to ignore him precariously perched on top of several boxes of lego/duplo

  128. Micaela says:

    Great blog. I always look forward to it. I have tried to vote for you but every attempt the register has been blocked (temporarily broken or something). Hope you win without my vote.

  129. K says:

    I hate anything a kid encounters toy or otherwise because they somehow turn it into work for me. I love all the toys and stuff because it helps them to grow and hopefully they will eventually be productive adults.

  130. Layla says:

    My 2yo’s favorite way to play with them is to slap the letters off the fridge and watch them bounce.

  131. Micaela says:

    Oh and I totally agree about the sand box (or pit as we call it in New Zealand). I also love/hate the large toy box in the corner of my living room filled with amazing toys that never get played with but I cannot donate because I love them and I remember every single person who gifted them to my kids and am grateful. I’m sure that big box will remain in the corner forever, because I’m sentimental and hopeful (that the kids will suddenly realise how lucky they are to have them)

  132. Pip says:

    Yep, lego definitely! And toy cars – the number of times I’ve nearly broken my leg standing on a toy car I can’t count.

  133. Susan D. says:

    Hope this helps somebody… We made a MULCHbox instead of a sandbox. Still fun to scoop with shovels and pails, but so much easier to clean up!

  134. I loathe sticks (anything even remotely stick-like that gets swung around and hitting things)and any and all audio toys.

  135. Dana says:

    I swear, we live in the same house! My husband actually sent this to me to look at :)

  136. LeahM says:

    I’m with you on the Legos. I will not soon forget the giant black bruise on the underside of my foot that lasted a week.

  137. Chelsea says:

    Don’t even complain about books– those look organized compared to the very second my child gets to a bookshelf. We’ve come up with contraptions to try to block him from being able to take the books off, to no avail. Imported books, board books, paperbacks… he tears them all. I want to buy a special cage for his books.

  138. Rhonda says:

    I was so happy when my little guy fell in love with the ride on choo choo I spent forever picking out for his 1st birthday. He’s now 3 and still loves it. But it is SO loud! I didn’t even notice until his little brother came along. Not much woke him up as a newborn except for that one toy that the older one wouldn’t stop playing with! One day I got fed up and hid the thing. After a couple of weeks he stopped asking about it!

  139. LeahM says:

    I hate “washable” tempura paints and “washable” crayons. Can we just say, um, not washable? My walls now need to be primed and painted over to get ride of washable crayon marks and my daughter’s clothing is permanently covered in washable blue paint. And, my new kitchen table (yes, I know it was a dumb purchase with kids) has washable glitter pen permanently smeared onto it.

    And I totally agree with everything else you hate. Except for the super ball that I don’t have. Yet.

  140. LeahM says:

    Ugh! My kids love to haul out the brooms and swing them near my head. Not on purpose. They are “helping” me sweep.

  141. Myssie says:

    You are so right about the puzzles! Three years ago (when my son was 3)I donated all the puzzles, ones with random missing pieces and all. My daughter is now two and LOVES puzzles. I had to go buy new damn puzzles and three days, THREE DAYS later…old missing puzzle pieces show up!

  142. lauriethomas says:

    Hahaha – this is my life. I will never EVER get that song out of my head.

  143. Kella says:

    oh goodness so very true ouch!

  144. Mandy says:

    Totally agree about the blocks. They take them all out and NEVER put them back!!! My four year old says he “can’t put them all back by himself”. Bull corn! You got them OUT all by yourself. Ugh. Kids. You gotta love them…just not their toys right?

  145. Kella says:

    Oh the balloon that got away, yep we’ve had melt downs on that arena too, the worst was last year summer.

    I was out back doing some gardening and my kids was out front playing on the neighbourhood green with their friends, suddenly I heard this blood curdling screaming and bawling and I thought to myself, what has my 5yr old hurt now, OMG has she done it this time and cracked her skull open!

    So I run out to the front to see three other neighbours also coming out their front doors to see who’s been maimed. Only to find my little one pointing towards the sky and shouting almost incomprehensibly ” MY BAAAAAAALLLLLLLOOOOOOONNNNNNNN!” It took me a while to understand what she was saying while I frantically scanned her for blood and at the same time shouting at her big sis, where is she hurt?!

    Finally I understood what she was hollering and also could just about make out the disappearing heart shape helium balloon in the distance, the child was distraught, I tell you.

    The stupid balloon had been rolling around on the livingroom floor about 2 days now and I had removed the weight to put away for safe keepings, the great weather meant the front door was open and it must have been rolling pass the door an odd gust of wind must have been all that it needed to get airbourne again and it was bye bye balloon :(

    The poor little mite still gets sad whenever she remembers or whenever she gets a new balloon.

  146. Rachael says:

    I agree! We also have the little metal fighter airplanes with the pointy wings. Those hurt!

  147. Susannah says:

    We have an old Ernie doll hidden in a closet (my 2 year old is terrified of it.) Every once in a while (usually at 3am), Ernie announces “I feel great!”
    It amuses me that Ernie in the closet feels great but it really is creepy in the middle of the night!

  148. Aimee Hewitt says:

    Not a toy but I hate the singing potty. “toliet paper toliet paper on the roll next to me, i can use a few squares, maybe one or two squares, how bout three, hooray for me!” is not what you want to hear in the middle if the night when the ghost needs to go

  149. Susannah says:

    I absolutely HATE pink aisles in toy stores – ok girls, this is where all the inappropriately dressed, impossible body-type dolls are that you’re supposed to play with.

    I cannot stand girl toys (I have two girls.) Boy toys (that sounds bad!) are so much cooler. I buy my girls stuff they can build, explore, etc…. everyone else buys them pink plastic or Disney princesses. Grrr..

  150. elisa.koenig@hotmail.com says:

    We super glue those suckers to the feet! ;-)

  151. Ashley says:

    My two year old will only play with his on the “word hunt” mode, but doesn’t know how to use that mode. Then he puts in the wrong letter and gets really mad when it tells him to “try again.” Tantrum ensues. Multiple times a day.

  152. Katie says:

    I hate those damn vehicles that come with duplo blocks in them. The blocks get dumped all over the place, scattered amongst the other crap all over my living room.

    A close second for me are those wooden blocks that come in a mini wagon thing. I believe my girls have NEVER built anything with them. They get thrown everywhere, they try to stand on the mini wagon and surf on it, someone gets hurt, etc. Oh and those wooden blocks KILL if you step on them at night.

  153. sara says:

    you forgot musical instruments. my husband and i are both musicians and love that my son is so interested in music. but somehow, he only ever wants to play his piano when the baby is sleeping. or when i’m sleeping, on that rare occasion where the baby is sleeping and my husband is playing with the toddler.

  154. All of your choices, AND:
    • Legos
    • Train Tracks
    • Blocks
    (In equal parts…)

    I have stuffed the space under my couch with gallon-sized water bottles to double as emergency preparedness (we’re in So-Cal, too), AND toy deflection. So far, so good!

  155. Mercy says:

    I agree. In my house Lego MUST be spread across the floor, it MUST NOT EVER be built into something and played with. Oh, the pain.

  156. Mercy says:

    I feel the same.

  157. Mercy says:

    Oh, right now playdough is on the hate list. My 2 year old will play nicely with it and will actually keep it on the table, but the 4 year old will only last about 2 minutes before he pulls it into tiny pieces and throws all of them on the floor for the baby to find. Last time I found blue playdough in the baby’s teeth and couldn’t get it out, and guess what was in her diaper the next day? Eww.
    And sand. Why do kids have to get so covered in it?
    I hate missing puzzle and set pieces too. I used to be so proud of keeping all sets complete, until my eldest learned how to lose them. Now if I want to keep something, anything, nice and in good condion (books, hm..) I have to keep them out of reach. My son has destroyed more books and puzzles in the last 4 years than I ever thought was possible for a child to damage.

  158. nicole says:

    The books! The books! I can read them upside down, in the dark, because he only ever asks for one of 3, and I’ve got them memorized!

  159. Amber says:

    Oh no! How will she change them to match her outfits?

  160. twinsmommie says:

    Little girl’s make-up sets….. need I say more???? Who thinks its a good idea to give 5 year olds a collection of multi colored, greasy, glittery “make-up”? Ever tried to get that crap out of hair? Worse yet carpet….

  161. Houston mom of 2 says:

    Sidewalk chalk! For some reason people keep giving it to us as gifts (probably because you can get giant boxes of it for cheap) and the boys BEG to play with it…so much so that I have resorted to keeping it in the hall coat closet next to the vacuum cleaner where they have no interest in playing. You see, we live in Houston, where there are about 2 weeks a year where the weather is pleasant enough to be outside and anywhere near anything paved without risk of spontaneously combusting (week #2 just started). After lots of begging, the boys color for two minutes, scatter chalk all over the sidewalks (did I mention we have big boxes of the stuff?), beg mommy to draw everything they can imagine and then are ready to retire inside where it’s cooler. Somehow, in that process, they have managed to cover themselves in chalk dust from head to toe and shouldn’t be allowed near the house, let alone inside it. The worst part? I aspire to someday have artistic talent like Amber’s; do you have any idea how long it takes my miserable doodles to disappear from our public byways?!

  162. dietcokehed says:

    Ha! My 7yr old has several of those planes currently all over his floor. HE stepped on one this morning getting ready for school and I was like “oh-ho-ho! Maybe you should PICK them UP huh?!” Yeah, no, he hasn’t… >.<

  163. dietcokehed says:

    Ugh, glitter. The herpes of the craft world…

    (but it’s so preeeeety! :)

  164. Laura says:

    Balloons are horrid. And the tall character shaped ones are really creepy, in the middle of the night they hover around in the dark and scare you en route to the bathroom or child’s room.

  165. Amber S. says:

    I bought my 3 year old daughter a flute for her Easter basket (that’s right, I have been suffering for six whole months now). It’s her favorite toy. I had imagined her sitting and learning to make different notes with it, eventually playing sweet little non-melodies around the house. Sort of fairylike, I guess. No amount of cajoling will interest her in the fact that she can play more than two notes on it. Two months. Every day. All day. For six months. Whee-oo whee-oo whee-oo whee-oo whee-oo. It’s like a little ambulance in my house.

  166. Diana Lee says:

    I’m not a parent, but I registered at parents.com just to vote for you!

  167. Nicky says:

    Ohhh *groan* I can’t stand mixing the playdoh colours for the sake of it, I just couldn’t do that but my daughter likes all the pots in brown obviously.

  168. Amy says:

    I had to laugh at this one. My son likes to stick them to himself. With the last time being nearly the entire box of camo band-aids stuck to the top of his head because he had bumped into something. Camo band-aids stick like duct tape and I had to shave his head to get them off.

  169. Mishi says:

    In my experience (I have a 1 year old and 3 year old), ALL toys end up in a giant mixed up mess and then they end up playing with ANYTHING that isn’t a toy. In fact, I feel like they use “non toys” a heck of a lot more than actual toys. Cans from the cupboards, pots and pans, sticks from outside, anything they can find in the bathroom or my bedroom, pieces of mail, pens, etc. I don’t even know why I bother to buy them toys because all they end up with is, like you pointed out, puzzles missing pieces and toys with parts strewn about in different rooms in the house!

  170. Danielle says:

    I’m still also laughing about the burrito belly from the other day.

    But also, the toys! I think my other love/hate is dress-up clothes. My daughters are 1 and 3, and so they need my help the whole time they’re playing (to get elaborate dresses on and off and on and off). But I love that pretend to be fairy princesses or frogs. How can you not?

  171. Betsy says:

    YES! My husband took the baby out so I had the whole house TO MYSELF, I grabbed a cup of tea and settled into the couch to watch some much deserved HGTV. Then something in the closet behind me shifted startling me and I hear a creepy little voice….”that tickles”! It sounded like a pervert! I could not wait until “Fisher” the dog found his home in a memory box down in the basement (batteries removed)!

  172. Stephanie K. says:

    Hahaha!! Can I add another reason to hate sandboxes? If you live in the country and don’t have a cover on it, it becomes a giant litter box for local cats.
    I have small kids AND I teach kindergarten. I feel your pain. I also hate playdough because kids want to eat it. And they feel no shame about it. You nailed all the reasons I hate the same toys. I also hate lego because it’s sharp. I hate all toys with repetitive sounds/that need batteries. I love that yours are all “natural” type toys, timeless toys, things we played with (that our mothers likely hated too)…off to share this on facebook, and will link to it from my classroom blog next week! Thanks!

  173. Herpes of the craft world lol favorite line from Demitri Martin… My cell phone is my #1 love to hate toy…lifesaver at long appointments, hate being asked for it EVERYTIME it’s out or how often it goes missing, on silent of course. My daughter has actually thrown one away and happily admitted it after the trash was taken out and collected. I once fell asleep with it under my pillow, woke up with it under my pillow but found pictures of me asleep in my gallery which she proudly exclaimed “I sneaked in your room when you were sleeping, but I put the phone back like you said mommy!” Sigh!

  174. karen says:

    I have been unsuccessful at voting! :( but I will keep trying. I keep thinking of you in the morning when my young baby co-sleeper keeps pulling a “starfish” on me! ;)

  175. Sherry Jones says:

    There was a toy we had when our kids were toddlers, called the “Ball Popper”. It would use a blast of air to pop the balls out, which would hover in mid air over the blast of air, then fall back down into a snurgly track to join the ranks of balls waiting to be popped up. All to the tune of “Pop Goes the Weasel”.
    The kids *loved* it, and I loved it because they loved it.
    However, the cat *loved* it too, and somehow learned how to turn the d*mn thing on. In the middle of the night. Every night.
    I got really sick and tired of being woken up at 2am to the sounds of “Pop Goes the Weasel” coming from the living room…

  176. Amber Dusick says:

    That is a REALLY good one. I think it would have been #6 on my list!

  177. Amber Dusick says:

    Okay, you guys will then appreciate that I have an ENTIRE post about the satan dog coming your way.

  178. Vanity_Mom says:

    I hate the Fisher Price Dog… it drives me nuts, and it now randomly goes off so if my kid forgets about it he sends out a reminder that he needs to come off the shelf and be played with for 5 seconds and then left in the middle of the floor. I can’t wait to have a sacrificial burning of it when my child is old enough and has cooler toys.

  179. Sarah says:

    I’m with you on everything except books. I gave up long ago on keeping children’s books on shelves. They are all in bins at my house. Easier to clean up, easier for kids to find, less of a hazard. And I do “weed” them sometimes. I don’t get rid of them with the same heartless abandon I use with toys, but occasionally there are some that can go.

  180. amethystalbert@gmail.com says:

    Stuffed animals — they are total dust mite magnets, and have you ever tried to throw one away? I have to close my eyes so I don’t see that sweet little stuffed animal face looking back at me.

  181. Allison says:

    My little boys thomas the train set….he FREAKS if the track gets messed up and broken. I spend most of my day remaking it and then watching him demolish it 30mins later. He freaked out when we glued it down too…didn’t like the fact that he couldn;t destroy it.
    Someone needs to make a toy that fixes itself..and puts itself away. :)

  182. Donna says:

    musical instruments!!!! I sent my husband out to do the birthday shopping for my 3yr old’ sb day. Ya he came back with an effn drum set! That is a gift you get other people’s kids NOT your own.

  183. kate says:

    HA! you need ‘like’ on the comments because YES TO SO MANY I AGREE! But i am far too lazy to reply to all of them :)

    i have to add – candy land. YAY! it’s a game! counting, colors, fun! oh but the LOSING.. it is painful and requires twice as much time to recover from. And creative “i’m just waiting for you at the party! hurry up! next card!” after trying to lose in every possible way – failing miserably. Why can’t winning the lottery be this easy?

    My mom taught my 5 year old to play Uno. For some reason, losing in Uno is no big deal. I LOVE THIS GAME! and you can play twice in about 5 minutes. SCORE no hate! my mother may be a genius.

  184. Deela says:

    The thing that I really love, though they are not really a toy, is our hermit crabs. I love watching the girls play with them, they become pets for the barbies, obstacles for cars, companions to read to and lots of other fun things. They are the quietest/coolest little critters ever!!! I hate them because at least once a week one of them goes missing and we have to search the entire house. Those darn thing are so good at finding the perfect hiding spot, usually in the toy box, book shelf, under the couch or in the shoe pile.

  185. Julie M. says:

    My son is 5 months old and we just bought him an activity center (you know… one of those stationary type of things with a seat in the middle and toys all around the child. It’s sort of like what a walker used to be.). I HATE the stupid thing! He loves it until he starts chewing on a particular toy. Because he can’t pull it off and put it totally into his mouth he starts screaming like he’s lost his goofy little mind. I swear if the child could curse he’d have a mouth like a sailor. It drive me nuts because there are six other toys attached to the table and the baby only notices the toy that ticks him off. I have actually thought about cutting the toy off and throwing it away.

  186. Zen says:

    Peanut butter works wonders with sticky stuff and getting gum out of anything :)

  187. Kay says:

    I agree. I’ve given the other blog several tries now – to me it’s not even close to funny. It shouldn’t be in the place it is. Five kids and Crappy Pictures are HILARIOUS!

  188. niiocle says:

    I say all the time “ballons are evil, they cause nothing but sadness and dispair”. When we go to fairs i ‘m like the crazy mean mommy “no! For the millionth time you can not have a free balloon.” People look at me like what’s her problem? I hate transformer too. What’s wrong with me that I can’t figure out how to transform them?

  189. Catherine K. says:

    Yes, my daughter has a little rabid a cloth that she loves and sucks on. Sometimes the smell that comes off of it is enough to upset my tummy. I use Rockin Green, and the smell is GONE plus it is actually white again (normally it is kind of a cream color… Yuck).

  190. Jan says:

    I am surprised no one has mentioned what the neighbor’s cats leave in the sandbox!

  191. Jeannie says:

    Alphabet magnetic letters! Obviously love that they are letters on the fridge, learning, spelling, etc. HATE that I have to pick them up a dozen times a day, or step on them, or fish them out of the dog’s water bowl…

  192. DITTO!!
    I would also like to add acorn caps…they REALLY hurt to step on!

  193. Mardi says:

    I hate the long, long death throes of balloons. They’re half-deflated and covered in disgusting greasy fingermarks, and if I’m really lucky my daughter will have drawn all over them with texta so they leave inky smudges around the place. And they can last for WEEKS, like the Thing That Will Not Die.

  194. Lisa says:

    I hate and love electronic toys, like books that make animal noises or play music etc. Love them because my son loves them. They make him so happy and keep him occupied. Hate them because they soon run out of batteries, and he’ll stand there with the silent toy, looking sad and confused and I can’t be bothered to find a tiny screwdriver, open the battery compartment, go out and buy the very rare and special battery needed and replace it. Plus, if you wait too long and then replace the batteries, he freaks out when it suddenly starts making noises again.

  195. Helen Neale says:

    You are utterly fab! Again, I have a lovely smile on my face after reading and seeing your pictures. And I totally agree with you on the playdough front in particular – hate the stuff with a passion, but my kids love it. I haven’t found someone to hide it yet where they can’t find it…

    As a former librarian (bun not included), I understand your hatred of the book reading aftermath too…I have to clean up after school kids had demolished our library!

  196. Stickers. The bane of my existence. It never fails that they are stuck to furniture, the dog, my foot, in the laundry, etc.

  197. Ali says:

    It’s the books for me. When we put a bookshelf in our son’s room i had this romantic idea about him going up and picking out one or two ro read and the rest staying just as they have been carefully arranged. You can say it, I’ll say it with you ‘FOOL!’. It looks just like one in your second picture 99.99999999% of the time.

  198. Amanda says:

    Oh, the Fisher Price Puppy….that thing is SO possessed!! Creepy…

  199. Rebekah says:

    I hate almost any toy that comes in a party favor bag. Can we please start a campaign to educate parents of the idiocy of party favor bags? ;)

  200. That was so so funny! I laughed out loud, and shared it on Facebook and Twitter. I blog about recommended books for kids, but the pictures of the disordered bookshelves was the funniest. The playdough! I hate playdough so much!
    I subscribed immediately.

  201. That was so so funny! I laughed out loud, and shared it on Facebook and Twitter. I blog about recommended books for kids, but the pictures of the disordered bookshelves was the funniest. The playdough! I hate playdough so much!
    I subscribed immediately.

  202. RedinNC says:

    Gotta agree with balloons. We brought one home from the grocery store and it spent exactly 3 seconds inside the house. Son lets it go, it hits the popcorn ceiling, and POP! :(

    Also why do toys that make noise have a “low” and a “high” volume setting???? You NEVER want the high setting. Ever.

  203. Jena says:

    My brother had a grasshopper “room guard” toy from the movie Antz that liked to yell “HALT who goes there?!” at 2 in the morning on the way to the bathroom. Not looking forward to more of that

  204. stephanie says:

    we live in the same house – except i have just one kid. scary.

  205. Sara says:

    Whoa, you have books left on the shelves?! Somehow, to get the one they want to read over-and-over, my daughters must first remove every. single. one. And step on the rejects.

  206. amy says:

    Hee hee so true. And don’t forget about stepping on pieces of puzzles, play dough and more

  207. Heather says:

    Moon Sand. DIdn’t even realize had I had some on my hand last night, rubbed my eye. Next thing I know I’m running for the eye wash. It felt about like sand and jalapenos in my eyes.

  208. Anna says:

    We used to have toy velociraptors that would growl and scream… talk about terrifying in the middle of the night.

  209. We have a dollhouse. It’s full of furniture, people, mini princesses, figurines that came with other sets. Half of the furniture is on the floor, along with Snow White, who is out of favor most of the time. The stuff that is IN the dollhouse looks like it was placed there via natural disaster. I can carefully and artfully clean it all up, but the moment my 4yo plays with it it is all destroyed. Of course though I love listening to the many narratives that she comes up with while she plays with her house/school/hotel/whatever it is today.

  210. joeysmom says:

    My brother got my son a ball pit for his 2nd birthday. He loves it, and it’s fun, except… he loves to throw all the balls out the top, so they are littering the entire living room. I put them back, he throws them out. I’m like Pavlov’s mother and he knows it. Also, the balls are really thin plastic, so if you step on them, they are toast. This is very sad for the little man when it happens.

  211. Megan says:

    I have to agree 100% on this. My kids don’t play with legos yet. But I remember stepping all over my brothers in the middle of the night no less.

  212. kerry says:

    Exactly, Megan! I feel that if it needs batteries it probably wasn’t a very good toy to begin with. And they make me feel like the Grinch bc I HATE “all the noise, noise, noise, noise!”

    This includes that silly leapster business. If I want to teach my kid to read, I’ll use that mound of books on the floor next to the book shelf :)

  213. Liz says:

    Husband bought superball yesterday.

    Why does he want to punish me?

  214. Andrea says:

    I miss the doctor kit days.

  215. Andrea says:

    We duct tape over all speakers to reduce the noise level.

  216. Andrea says:

    You don’t even have to buy glitter, it just appears out of nowhere. My baby has a few sparkly grains stuck to her skin at all times.

  217. Andrea says:

    Happy meal toys. They are so fun – for 5 minutes. Then they are never played with again, but a fit ensues if I try to get rid of them. Plus I just think about natural resources wasted.

  218. Karissa says:

    My husband is an evil, evil man. He has 6 older siblings (he’s the youngest). One year for Christmas he bought all the nieces and nephews rechargeable batteries and the chargers for them. Now he gets creeped out when the toys call to the child in the middle of the night. Payback’s a bitch!

  219. Satakieli says:

    Toy cars. I don’t mind regular toy cars so much, but my son has an affinity for emergency vehicles. With lights on the top of them. That really hurt when you step on them in the night.

    Marbles. I honestly thought getting him marbles for Christmas last year would be the cutest idea. I was kind of right, he adores them. But what was I thinking? Not only are they constantly strewn about the floor, under the couch cushions, under the dining table, in the fridge, in my shoes, in dvd cases, in the pockets of everyone in the family on laundry day, but he loves them so much that he insists on sneaking them into bed. He sleeps in our bed. Our bed contains at least 5 marbles of varying sizes at any given moment.

  220. While at my dad’s house on a recent visit, he asked me to help clear up a few things from the attic. To my wife’s delight I brought home 4 very old, dusty, spider-filled boxes of my old toys (my mom kept everything). Out of one of those boxes came a large Space Shuttle – cutely referred to as “bearpane” by our 2 year old son Liam. There are three buttons on the side. Each with their own blood curdling/fingernail-down-the-chalkboard-style of sounds. And since this gem was manufactured in 1979, there’s no volume control. Pure awesome.

  221. Dina says:

    I hate them all. Enough books to open a library. Too many toys that have sounds and lights. Large toys take up space. Small toys are tedious to pick up. Why do I bother buying toys? It comes down to pots and ladels in the end. I think the toy companies try to make them attractive to the parents so they’ll buy it. Here’s what REAL toys should look like if you want a kid to play with it:

    (1) Your keychain with all the keys on it
    (2) Your wallet, including bills, coins, and cards
    (3) Your phone, smart or dumb, doesn’t matter
    (4) Silverware
    (5) Pots and pans
    (6) Kitchen ladels and other utensils
    (7) Your shoes
    (8) Cables and electrical cords
    (9) The computer
    (10) TV remote

  222. Dina says:

    I threw them all out when they weren’t around.

  223. Dina says:

    I ended up throwing out the candyland. Cards go missing, kids freak out if they dont win. I can sympathize trying to lose and end up winning.

  224. Angela says:

    It’s as if you are looking in my windows!

  225. Jenny Vater says:

    My list is your exact list! We have many librarians in our family and I wouldn’t admit that one. It is nice when one comes over because she “fixes” my book shelves.
    I am enjoying your blog. It was mentioned on facebook at The Joyful Mother by one of your followers.

  226. Shannon Mulholland says:

    What you didn’t mention is how when the baby throws the puzzle pieces on the ground, you inevitably step on them in bare feet… How playdough grinds so well into carpet! or how sand always finds its way into the parent’s bed!

  227. Carrie Ann says:

    Small Cars!! I LOVE at how my son(s) play with them nicely. While I clean in one room, they can be in the other playing away. Good as Gold. Then …. when its time to clean that room (the one they were just in) … you step on a car. It dont feel too good in your bare feet. Especially in the tender spot of your foot (like the archy part). I taught them a lesson though after about 2 straight months of pain and suffering. I told them if I even SEE a car on the floor when I go to clean that room, “bye-bye” car …. it goes in the garbage. =). So far …. so good. (Hey … dont think Im being mean or anything. The oldest ones are 7 and 5 years old. They should know to pick up their toys by now.)

  228. Carrie Ann says:

    I know what you mean about your mom not throwing anything out. Also … no volume control ….. ooof. So not cool. I wont buy a toy unless it has a volume control. If it has a “mute” button … I will buy THAT one over the toy that HAS volume control. Those are very hard to find though. *sigh*

  229. Playdough with one child: we only play with one color at a time… but she’s 2 so I don’t know how much longer that will last…

    Sandbox pros: we co-bathe and the sand on the bottom of the tub is a GREAT exfoliant ;-)

  230. lovin_life says:

    Oh my gosh the drama!!! Once our little girl was 18 months old and her balloon flew up to the ceiling fan and spun around and around till it was caught and popped and she was traumatized from this with huge tears and screams as if someone were dying. She still to this day (she’s 4 now) can’t leave a balloon in a room with a fan on, she checks to make sure the fan is off and if it’s not she goes and hides the balloon in her closet to keep it safe.

  231. lovin_life says:

    I hate the toys that go off in the toy box repeatedly. You finally get your little one to sleep and then you hear it going off over and over again and have to dig though the box and toss the thing out the back door!

  232. Kristin Dohn says:

    I HATE Match-Box cars. I love them, cuz my boys love them and now my daughter loves them, and they can drive them around all sorts of things for hours… even antique furniture or the hood of my brand new car… which is why I hate them. Because they drive them EVERYWHERE, including the hood of my brand new car which now has matchbox sized scratches all over it. And I also hate Match-Box cars when I step on the pointy parts at night because the cars do not drive themselves into a toy box but instead drive themselves out from under sofas and chairs at all hours of the night so that I may step on them and cringe in (quiet) pain as I trod to bed at night. (And I am totally with you on books, I put my Mother on book giving restrictions since I do not believe I should have to buy more furniture to store all of these crazy books!)

  233. jr says:

    Ball pits are a mess! I can’t imagine what this house is going to look like when they are done with their pit!

    http://thepitballs.blogspot.com/

  234. Sarah Morrisseau says:

    i hate the ball popper. i had one as a kid and yes, it was fun to annoy people with it. but upon learning that i was pregnant i quickly informed everyone i spoke to that if they EVER gave my children one of these for a gift that i would show up at their house at 3am with it to demonstrate why they never should have purchased me one in the first place. happy to say that we are still popper free….

  235. Denise says:

    I can add to the super ball saga… While vacationing we stopped to get ice cream after visiting arcade where my son (then 2ish) won a super ball. After retrieving it from the street 101 times we told him we wouldn’t get it again until we had all finished our ice cream. He was sad and kept a close eye on it as cars went by. No big deal until a garbage truck went by and turned that damn ball to dust. There were tears, sadness from the kids, tears of laughter from me and my husband. What are the chances!?

  236. Kathryn says:

    Ohmygosh ball pits. Ugh! I follow this page with fascination and pity for this guy’s wife. https://www.facebook.com/pitballs

  237. Brianna says:

    legos just simply because they can create anything with them accept the thing on the box that mommy is trying to create for them. also even though we clean up when we are done i always find the one we missed at 5 am when i wake up to start coffee

  238. Melissa says:

    Your picture of the playdough aftermath is perfect, except not illustrated are the million tiny bits that are stuck flat to the kids’ (and my) socks afterward :/

  239. I got so sick of reading the same book repeatedly that I made a two reads maximum rule. I’ll read it once the second time, then she has to select something else.

  240. Sonne says:

    Ok. My sister (who has no kids) found your blog the other day and my husband and I have been glued and reading all to catch up. Luckily (and I say this with some tongue in cheek) my daughter has been sick most of the week so I have had ample reading time :). Now… I have a daughter with daugher parts… So I hate sand. I hate sand in her (very thick long) hair and sand in cracks that it goes into … We recently visited the beach at my MIL house and she didn’t have the handy shower head in a hose so my poor kid had to sit on a stool, spread eagle, then bend over the stool so I could get it all out of there. Oy vey!!! Anyway, that’s my vote!

  241. Jasmine in Jazzyland says:

    Any toy that talks. It’s really cute to see the kids playing with them and interacting with them as if they were real, but at 2:00am, when everyone’s sleeping, and the toys start going off by themselves… It’s a lot less cute. O.O

  242. Ali says:

    Mum gave us a big plastic hippo that “eats” toys, but it’s a pain to open, and the open/close bit is the only thing my 15mo likes about it. He screams and screams until I open it, at which time he closes it, then starts up with the screaming again when he can’t open it. I have hidden it.

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