I’m in the kitchen and Crappy Baby is in the next room.
He requests water and even remembers to say “please” at the end.
I ask about ice. This is where it gets complicated.
You see, unless it is over 100 degrees outside, I’m not fond of ice water. I like water room temperature because I’m cold all the time and ice water doesn’t help this problem. When I get water for myself it is sans ice. However, Crappy Papa is an ice water sort of a guy. He likes ice in his water. It is just the way he is and I’ve accepted it. If I get him water I know what to do. I add ice.
Crappy Boy and Crappy Baby have not yet decided where they stand on this issue. Sometimes they want ice. Sometimes they don’t. Eventually they’ll outgrow this annoying wishy washyness and take a stand. Or perhaps they’ll grow up to be a hybrid “sometimes ice, sometimes not” type of person. I’ve heard that those people actually exist and have friends.
Since Crappy Baby is still developing his preferences, I have to ask about his ice requirements.
He wants ice so I head to the freezer.
No ice then.
Ice it is!
It’s tough to make important decisions.
Decisions, decisions. So many good books just came out by funny friends of mine and even more are coming soon. Which one should you get? Answer: all of them.
I Heart My Little A-Holes is a hilarious (seriously, strap on an adult diaper or read it on the toilet) book about allllllllll the crazy crap that babies and kids put their parents through on a daily basis.
From “boy meets girl” to “boy marries girl” to “girl could really use like 40 minutes to herself.”
Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves by Robin O’Bryant from Robin’s Chicks. I asked her to describe her book in one sentence and this is what she said:
“A book about motherhood that will make you nod with recognition while simultaneously reminding you to schedule a hysterectomy.” Jenny Lawson, The Bloggess & Author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened
Her sentence is better than mine.
Parenting: Illustrated with Crappy Pictures by me from here. It came out last year and it isn’t even a re-release, I’m just tossing it in this bundle because I haven’t given a copy away in a long time. I asked myself to describe my book in one sentence and this is what I said:
I’m sorry I forced those guys to answer this question, that was lame. It’s just the usual illustrated parenting stories and stuff. And now I’m up to three sentences.
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