Taking A Nap

This post isn’t about my kids taking naps. It is about me taking naps. And also Crappy Papa.

Sometimes we are tired. Even on weekends. This actually happens to us. Unheard of, I know.

So last Sunday, after a particularly late night (it was Crappy Papa’s birthday) we decided to let each other nap.

The deal is that Crappy Papa gets one hour to sleep. I watch the kids. Then we switch. We even use a timer. Sleep trading is serious business. We have conducted this business before. 

Crappy Papa goes first. He is asleep within one minute:

napping1

His total sleep time is 59 minutes. (Probably more like 59.5 minutes but who is counting.)

He comes out of the room refreshed. Now it is my turn to nap!

Thank goodness, I’m barely able to keep my eyes open.

I lay down and close my eyes:

napping3

After a few minutes I am completely relaxed. I’ll fall asleep at any moment. 

And then:

napping2

I’m startled awake by loudness and crying. Why is there so much loudness and crying?

The kids are fine. They are quiet again within seconds, but it doesn’t matter. My heart is racing and I can feel the adrenaline surging after being yanked from the threshold of sleep.  

Hello, awake! Wait, no, I’m not awake, I’m tired.

So I try to relax again. I close my eyes. I breathe deeply. I’m so tired. I ignore the noise coming from the rest of the house. It starts working. 

Again, I’m teetering on the brink of sleep and:

napping5

This time it is laughing. But it doesn’t matter. It has the exact same effect.

Now at this point I make a mistake. I look at my phone to see how much time I have left to sleep. It isn’t much.  

So then I spend the next several minutes fretting over how I need to fall asleep right now! I’m running out of time! I’m tired! I have to fall asleep! Sleep! Just go to sleep already! SLEEP NOW! 

This doesn’t work. Obviously. 

So I switch my method. Once again I just try to relax. I reassure myself that even if I don’t actually sleep I’m still getting rest. 

Finally, I sleep! Then five minutes later, the alarm goes off: 

napping4

Which means I’m more tired than before the nap. Great. 

———————–

PS – Ear plugs! This might work. It just might. It is much cheaper than sound proofing our bedroom and less addictive than sleeping pills. Worth a shot! I’m more excited than that time I won a trip to Las Vegas at the grocery store!*

(*Yes, true story. I was 19 though. So I can’t remember the rest.)    

This entry was posted in crappy pictures, marriage, parenting, sleeping (or not). Bookmark the permalink.

242 Responses to Taking A Nap

  1. Alexandra Fuller says:

    I SOOO use earplugs when I nap and everyone else is awake! I have even been known to pull them out at night when DH is snoring far too loudly!! I attribute much of my sanity to the use of ear plugs… ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Mel G says:

      Me too! It’s the only way for us mums to switch off….

    • Kristin says:

      Me too! As I was reading it reminded me of before I discovered my wonderful ear plugs.
      ๐Ÿ˜‰

      • mamaj says:

        You women have it easy…as they grow they get into your room and shake or poke you, with questions, fairness issues…yada yada. Even DH asks what’s for dinner. I installed a lockable door knob …forget waiting for DH…although I thot he’d jump on it when I said we’d have uninterruptible “close afternoons”, but he saw through my plan to the real motive: private slumber. Good luck.

    • Laura says:

      Yep. They’re a must-have for naps AND snoring…. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Kristin says:

      Earplugs all the way! And one of those airplane eye masks. It’s the only way.

  2. Sarah says:

    That is why we have a box fan in our room. I turn it on high, shut the door and all else is drown out! Ah, sleep…

    • Penny says:

      We have a fan and I use a white noise app on my iPod. It works very well. :o)

      • Andrea says:

        I use the fan in the bathroom off my room. It’s loud enough to block most of the noise. I love this post because this is me. My husband can sleep through all the noise but that mama instinct has me ready to fly out of bed anytime I think the kids are hurt or doing something they shouldn’t be. Thankfully my husband has learn to take the children outside or to the park when it’s my turn to nap. Sleep trade is vital to our survival. Just kidding, but not really.

        • Rebecca says:

          The fan in the bathroom actually keeps me awake. If my husband gets up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, that noise makes sure I am awake until he comes back to bed and gets comfy again.

    • candice says:

      That’s right… White noise isn’t just useful for babies. A fan or an air purifier on high provides great noise masking and is more comfortable than ear plugs.

    • Lisa says:

      Yep! A white noise CD works well too. I could never get comfy enough with ear plugs. Sigh.

    • Cassidy says:

      I use a box fan, too! It has been my best friend when it comes to trying to nap with kids.

  3. Annie says:

    I have been forced to use ear plugs for assigned nap time. We only have one kid, so nap times are pretty straight-forward affairs, but it works well for assigned “evening shifts” when stinky baby is sick.

  4. Cynthia says:

    This is so my life. And odds are, my husband is continuing his nap on the couch while the kids tear the house apart, and come to me whenever they need anything.

    • Meredith says:

      Oh, my goodness, that sounds so familiar!

    • Robonanny says:

      That’s _definitely_ what happens at my place ๐Ÿ™

    • Bobbie says:

      This is what happens at my house too. I feel your pain.

    • Lauren says:

      I definitely thought this post was missing something. The repeated visits to the bedroom for something only mama can fix (like changing a transformer that they market to kids but they can’t do on their own yet) while my husband watches TV (his show, not the kids), sleeps or plays on his iPad!

      • Andrea says:

        Same here. When I am with the kids, I am mostly WITH them. DH is watching TV, doing the dishes, playing iPad, etc. No wonder they escape and come wake me up.

    • Amber says:

      Yes, yes, yes indeedy. This is what happens at my place too. Then I can’t relax because I’m worried if I come out I’ll find the newly mobile 8 month old playing with cords and the 3 year old painting the wall with my bobbie brown makeup….

    • Amber says:

      Yes, this is the story at my house, also.

    • Rebecca says:

      Yup, my husband gets home from the office early, and I am all psyched because I am practically on fire with one arm falling off, ready to pass off the baby so I can, you know, go pee and eat something, but he insists he MUST have a nap. Um, dude, you fell asleep well before I did last night (as usual), and I woke up before you. Tell me how this is fair.

      • Rebecca says:

        Just a note to add that he doesn’t get to take said nap often, but occasionally, if all is going well without him, I say ok… But he did express the huge importance of this naptime during an argument over it this past weekend. He did see it my way, however, in that I *never* get that naptime/time to myself that he insists on having. (When the baby is napping, I am working, since we are self-employed.)

      • Danielle says:

        I can totally relate. Dh doesn’t go to bed before me but he sleeps in way late! I am up EVERY morning with ds even on weekends when dh is off. I bring this up in our arguments though.

    • Mishi says:

      LOL

  5. April says:

    Oh my. The ear plugs seem like a good solution to a horrible problem. I can’t believe I never thought of that. The most frustrating part is that my hubby does not understand why I can’t just shut everything out, like he does. Grrr. If only I had that ability, I wouldn’t need the nap to begin with. Sometimes I just want to put rocks in his pillow. wha ha ha ha! *evil laff*

  6. Ancy says:

    Naps? When Appa is supposed to be watching the kids (we have two), one will do everything in his or her power to distract Appa while the other sneaks into the room to “check” on Amma- “Are you sleeping? Why are you sleeping? Are you sick? Open your eyes…”

  7. Misty Pratt says:

    When my daughter was 6 months and still waking me every 45min at night, I hired a babysitter who came to my house 3 days per week for 3 hours. I would hand my daughter over, close my door, shove some ear plugs in and fall into a deep and blissful sleep. Worth every penny ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Nicole H. says:

      Oh that is genius. Wish I’d done that. The only reason I took to co-sleeping for a period of time was so that I could sleep while nursing her since she did it so very often.

      My daughter still takes a two hour nap, so if I need to, I nap at the same time and just keep the monitor near. But I still have to have the ceiling fan and another fan on for white noise or I just can’t sleep.

      I can’t do earplugs, they make it too quiet. I need some sort of white noise.

    • candice says:

      You should have sleep trained that baby and had it sleeping through the night by 6 months. That way you wouldn’t have had to leave it with a stranger while you napped. At 6 months I would not have been able to sleep with someone else taking care of my infant.

      • candice says:

        I just read your baby had GERD. Totally different story. Sorry for the snap judgement!

      • Lise says:

        To each his own. I would rather have a babysitter hold my child while she sleeps so I can sleep (she never said it was a stranger) than to use something like CIO.

        This is naps in our house, too, except my daughter is now 2.5 and will snuggle up and watch a movie while I nap.

      • Rachel says:

        What a very judgemental comment. Seriously? Who said it was a stranger? Not every baby sleeps through the night at 6 months. Hell, my 3 year old doesnt even sleep through the night. Why mothers judge each other like this is beyond me.

        • Catherine says:

          She apologized.

          • Frances says:

            Not much of an apology when it’s only offered because the baby had GERD. So the rest of us with babies who weren’t long sleepers and who did what we could to survive (whether we sleep trained or not…it doesn’t always work) deserve to be judged snappily? Give me a break. I quite happily slept with other people looking after my child at 6 months. But not being a complete idiot, I left him with people I trusted…just like, I suspect, the original commenter did.

        • Jennifer says:

          Ditto on the comment that she DID apologize, but she also said “sleep train” not CIO. We did sleep training and my son never cried. If you do sleep training correctly and early on you don’t even have to get to CIO. But yes, to each his (or her) own and kudos to Candice for quickly apologizing for the snap judgment. Some moms have to work or have other things going on and can not hold the baby 24/7 and can not expect a childcare giver to hold the baby 24/7 either. If you have ever worked in childcare and you have had a baby that comes in whose parents held them the whole time (not taking into account any special issues or illness) then you know how horrible it is on the childcare giver to have to hold 1 baby all day long when there are others that need as much love and tending to and when you have your own children you know how important self soothing and sleep training is. My son was sleeping like a champ and through the night by 3 months, was at Montessori school at 8 weeks to present (he is now 2) – taking naps learning to be independent, and could sleep anywhere we took him…and guess what, he loves his daddy and me just as much as if we didn’t sleep train and teach self soothing. So just like you don’t think it was right for her to judge holding baby, don’t judge those that choose to CIO, sleep train, or any other method that works for them.

          • Jenni says:

            Why mothers feel the need to compete, justify or explain their parenting decisions is beyond me? Everyone has their own way, all babies are different (as mother of 5 I know how much so), some sleep through beautifully at 3 months, others still wake age 3…so long as we are happy, the children are happy and we have worked out our own systems, leave it be….the judgements in these comments astound me. No-one deserves to be criticized for whether their child sleeps or not…I have never heard of anything more ridiculous…snap judgements have no place in mothers supporting mothers – which actually is very much what this blog is about…giving us all some light relief and a place to share and relate.

        • Renee Sanders says:

          Why do mothers judge each other? So the other mom can feel better about their parenting skills!!! For the record I had all my kids in bed last night early since DH was out of town, only to be woken by my 13 year old who had been trying to scare her sisters, and it backfired!! It never ends!! I always have one of my 4 children awake!!

      • Missmissmatilda says:

        Steady on the “should”‘s there!
        Ladies- if we can’t be supportive of each others’ methods of raising children (particularly if we’re only sharing stories, and not doling out advice), just think how much understanding and camradery we’re liable to miss out on!
        There is enough self-doubt going around in every mother’s head as it is- so unless we hear of a mother who is undeniably (by universal, not personal or cultural, standards) neglecting or maltreating their child, why not try holding back on the “should”s and being kind to each other and yourselves?

        I’ve been a teacher,a nanny and babysitter for over 17 years, and it saddens me to think of the many, many mothers I have met who are plagued, and in some case emotionally damaged, by doubts about “whether [they] are doing it right”. It causes me to wonder: is there someone standing above you with a clipboard, crossing and ticking off everything we do in preparation for a final, time-TBA, parenting judgement? If not, then just contemplate how many of your everyday thoughts and worries are unnecessary! A very clever lady once told me that, in general, people are so very wrapped up in their own lives that more often than not, they aren’t even CLOSE to caring about what you’re doing in yours. Think about it: how much do you REALLY think about the other people around you in the supermarket when your toddler is happily removing every Chuppa Chup lollipop from the container onto the aisle floor whilst you deal with the screaming tantrum of your infant who is desperately -and noisily- bemoaning the loss of his/her teething rusk, despite the fact that just a moment ago, he/she was the one responsible for vehemently throwing it onto the floor…. If you’re honest, how much could you NOT care less about the people around you?! So, why can’t that be true of them as well?

        Starting ti ramble- sorry.
        I appreciate that you apologized, and this is not meant to be me having-a-go-at-you-for-your-comment: I’m just wishing that EVERY mother could feel less under scrutiny and just relax into the wonderful role that she has been lucky enough to land!

        I think you’re ALL doing a bang-up job, no matter what anyone tells you. ๐Ÿ™‚

        • Leslie says:

          AMEN Missmissmatilda! SUPPORT your fellow woman/momma, regardless of the choices she (and her family) make!
          Personally, Crappy Momma- how did I/we (hubs) never think about this “timer” idea for adult napping?! Although I’m SURE I’d have the same results as you, I can’t believe I never thought of “sharing” nap time. ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Mom says:

        You shouldn’t have had kids if you don’t want them 24 hours a day. Sleep training is child abuse you sicko. Maybe when you’re old and disabled and they stick you in a room and let you cry and ignore you, you may understand exactly how cruel you were to your own children.

        • Good2btexan says:

          You meant that to be funny, right?

        • Ros says:

          I really hope you’re joking. That comment is very judgmental. I sleep trained my son at 8 months. It involved no crying and he is a much happier baby as he now sleeps well. I don’t know why everyone seems to think sleep training involves CIO?

      • Sarah says:

        Wow judgy much? Maybe you want to “sleep train” your babies but not everyone does. Sorry, but my babies need me just as much at night as in the day and that is totally ok.

        • Renee says:

          Amen to that!! Mothers need to stick together, not tear each other down. We all do what works best for our families!! It is different for every child of your family, trust me I know. Some kids will sleep, some will not. It is just part of the parenting roller coaster.

        • Mom says:

          It was a joke.

      • kelly kelly says:

        Eww candice, aren’t you perfect? Nicole was brilliant figuring a way to get sleep and feel human. Sure it made her a better mom. What could happen? Abuse? So rare, most people good. Both my twins sleep trained. One four months the other still up at almost three. Dosent work for all kids

      • Gabrielle says:

        Does this really look like a great forum to inform other mothers “You should have…”?
        It’s highly likely such comments are unwelcome almost every time you make them, whether you realize it or not. It’s great to apologize for snap judgements– it’d be even better if you figured out how to say nothing when you make one.

    • Kathy V. says:

      Holy psychoses, Batman! Can we all please just remember that we’re all in this parenting thing together, and stop beating up on each other? I THOUGHT THIS WAS A HUMOR BLOG. Sheesh.

      • HJS says:

        I for one found it humorous… ‘oh noes… someone on teh interwebs thinks someone else parents badly!’

        Meh, they don’t live in my house or eat my cheetos… let em think what they want. ๐Ÿ™‚

        • Kathy V. says:

          Cheetos are the great equalizer. Maybe if we all ate more Cheetos we’d be nicer to each other. (This is the cue for more psycho internet trolls to tell me how bad Cheetos are for babies. Aaaaaand … Go!)

  8. Janelle says:

    I can’t stand using ear plugs, but we have a fan in our room too. Turn it on high and point it away from the bed when you don’t need the actual breeze and you’re golden! Even with that I never sleep as well as daddy during naps. Dang mommy brain stays on high alert even when I hear nothing.

  9. Kim says:

    If I hired a babysitter I’d be lying there fretting about whether or not the sitter is taking the best care of bubs. So not worth it for me although I wish it would!

  10. Sonia says:

    This is so true!!!! Maybe I will try the ear plug thing next time.

  11. Chrissy says:

    ear plugs and a fan, its essential. ๐Ÿ™‚ Also, weather permitting, children and spouse really SHOULD leave the premises.

    • Cynthia says:

      Agreed!

    • Michelle says:

      I was going to suggest this as well! Maybe a quick jaunt to the library if it’s not nice outside…

      Fortunately, I only have one boy, and he still naps… so I can sneak in a nap at the same time… the girl child does not nap anymore, but she plays quiet as a mouse.

    • Becky says:

      YES! It is a must that they leave the house! We do the “swap who gets to sleep in on the weekends” thing. I get one morning, the hubs gets the other, with no cutoff time unless we HAVE to be somewhere by a certain time. Eventually you do learn to turn your brain off and just take the damn nap.

      • MamaBean says:

        Oh Becky I need to take a page out of your book. We tried doing the same thing this weekend, but my toddler ended up banging on the bedroom door for 10 mins and all my husband tried to talk to her like she was an adult. It was a no go. I’m going to suggest he leaves the house next time…either that or I’m going to pound on the door during his morning in. Probably wouldn’t work though – he’d snooze through that too.

        • Jasmine says:

          Totally. Without patronising fathers, I think it really helps to clearly set out expectations (“don’t come in and wake me up!”) and perhaps provide an activity before attempting to sleep. Preferably something that is outside the house and doesn’t need mama. I have prerecorded a few kids shows and ask him to watch a particular one with our bubba so I know it’ll be x minutes before he comes in asking me what to do. It always helps to be as specific as possible when giving instructions, no matter where you are or who you’re dealing with. I learned this after being woken up to be told he’d changed her nappy etc. good intentions but no real thinking it through for himself!

  12. Erin says:

    i was totally addicted to earplugs before our son was born. You can get them in girly hot pink or purple too! i will totally use them again when he’s big enough for others to watch. totally.

  13. Esther says:

    ugh! sounds exactly right! somehow, i manage to keep the noise level to a bearable hum whilst husband is sleeping, and he is just fine continuing his nap downstairs with the girls dancing on the furniture.

  14. This is hilarious ๐Ÿ˜€
    Here’s some advice: sleeping pills are great, but don’t ever ever EVER take them if you have very young children (like you do). It’ll make it hard for you to wake up in the night if there’s a problem and even in the morning. It’ll also make you forget things you did the night before. So yeah, don’t take them.

    • Sara says:

      ha! i’ve heard cocaine and heroine are also fun. but, like sleeping pills, don’t ever EVER take them ๐Ÿ™‚
      funniest advice ever.

  15. Lara@Mrs. A's World says:

    You might try a white noise track put on repeat. I bought one on iTunes called Ocean Sounds from a Baby Sleep album. It helps a ton! I hope you get some more naps in soon, Crappy Mama!

  16. Alice Rudin says:

    Send the boys and papa out of the house!!! make a dude play date and get them out!!!

  17. Susan says:

    That sounds familiar! I also use a noise maker- my kids’- but it works! And lock the door. And turn off all the phones. ๐Ÿ™‚

  18. jillsmo says:

    Earplugs are crucial to parenting

  19. I think this system works better than the “hubs naps on the couch, calls it ‘family time’ and gets really mad when the kids are loud and wake him up.”

    • Chrystal says:

      Story of my life! You can’t get mad at a teo year old for poking you when you are asleep in the middle of the living room using his bear as a pillow.

      • Holly says:

        I got the perfect visual while reading your post about the bear for a pillow. You made me snort at work! ๐Ÿ™‚

        • Chrystal says:

          It’s true! Or he will use the toddlers beloved blanket as a blanket. And then get mad when the toddler wants what’s his!

          I just don’t understand why he won’t go lay down in bed like a normal person.

      • beth says:

        that is totally my house! I will tell him to go in the room, but he won’t…and then he gets mad when all 6 of the kids are trying to watch a movie or play…sigh…men

      • Elisabeth says:

        Can you get mad if you are using Curious George instead??? How about when you try to cover up with the tiny baby blankets … I’ve been so tired before I tried to snuggle in under a receiving blanket tucked over my shoulders. Now that my little man is 4, I just sleep on the couch and allow the Wii to be my saviour.

  20. Forget the noise, it’s simply the idea that this is my one chance to get some rest – that’s what keeps me from falling asleep. Every. Time.

  21. Chrystal says:

    My husband works from 4am to 1pm so he’s generally tired. He gets home and the kids are sleeping. Each day I encourage him to nap while they nap. He refuses and instead decides to nap when they wake up, on the couch, and then is mad when they poke and jump on or around him.

    Men.

    Generally speaking though, he can sleep though about 5 or 6 body slams. Me? I wake up if I hear one of them sigh on the baby monitor. Ugh.

    • Mandy says:

      You too?? My husband never understands that. As soon as my children’s breathing changes I wake up because I can tell they’re about to. It drives me absolutely insane that we don’t even bother with the switching out at night time anymore because he never hears them so what’s the point if I still have to wake up to wake you up to go get them? By that time I’m already awake and can do it myself. Ha ha. Wish men had ears like bats like us mothers have!

      • Chrystal says:

        Yes!

        We try the whole you sleep in on Saturday and I’ll sleep in on Sunday but he will wake up and turn older boys monitor off (he’s almost three) and then older boy bangs so loudly it wakes baby boy so now they are both up. And I’ve woken husband 4 times asking if he would please go get them.

        Pointless!

        At least if I get up the house will be clean, dishes will be done and breakfast will be cooked!

        I am accustomed to 3 hours of sleep anyway but plan on taking a week when they are teens to just catch up on sleeping, napping, eating food at the intended temperature, etc.

  22. Wendy says:

    I use earplugs but since the great room is right below the bedroom, I hear everything! Plus my son is always howling for “MOMMMMMY”. Yet my husband sleeps through everything. There is also a bed near his office in the basement, so he tells me all the time that he is going to study and 2 hours later comes up all sleepy eyed with messy hair. Yet if I want a nap I have to beg for him to watch our son and then get the guilt trip.

  23. Bonnie says:

    definately ear plugs, eye mask, and fan, it works awesome for naps when everyone else is up

  24. Katie says:

    So not fair, is it? *sigh*- men.

    Loved this. Laughed. out. loud.

    Thank you!

  25. Lisa says:

    I love that you use a timer because my husband always takes a longer nap than he says he will. But I won’t make him use an alarm since he’s an “adult”. I totally know what you mean about it taking a long time to fall asleep!

  26. Kellista says:

    You just described my nightly ritual of falling asleep. DH works 2nd shift and our daughter is on his schedule. So he gets home at 11pm and they stay up together for a bit. I try to fall asleep but hear them together and sometimes it’s cute (still distracting) and sometimes it’s scary or annoying. Once I’m asleep it’s usually ok but it’s so hard falling asleep.

  27. SeriousCakes says:

    Hahaha! The only way I could ever get a nap is if husband left with the kids and I’d call him when I got up, otherwise no naps for mommy! Even now he can easily nap while the kids run rampant.

  28. Annika says:

    Can’t they play outside while you nap? It’s only when my husband and daughter go outside that I actually get some time to myself, without her calling “mamma!!!” every 5 seconds to check that I’m still there.
    (+ love your blog!)

  29. Amy says:

    Or just make sure to let the kids cry and make crash bang noises right outside Crappy Papa’s door while he is napping. Once or twice and he’ll get the picture. Maybe. It hasn’t worked with my hubby. Maybe yours.

  30. Fernanda says:

    Sometimes I just say thanks that I’m deaf on my right ear. This way I can just turn to the left, cover the left one and voilร , can’t hear a thing, lol. And having a husband that 1) lets me sleep as much as I want and 2) is pretty good at entretening our toddler is priceless. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Tina says:

      I too have lost my hearing in my right ear, and yes it is blissfully quiet sleeping on your left side. But when I try to nap I get anxious that I won’t hear when something goes wrong, so consequently I wake up to phantom noises. *sigh*

  31. Fernanda says:

    Oh, and I forgot: our 3 year-old daughter naps everyday for at least 2 hours. SO precious. i will be really sad when she stops her naps.

    • Mandy says:

      Mine too. I love it. I still have a 7 month old and getting them to nap at the same time is impossible most days but it’s still easier with just him without her running through the house wild and I can get a little down time! People think I’m crazy that she still naps but she’s the one that wants them.

  32. Canadian Dad says:

    My wife and I do the exact same thing, with alarms and everything! It usually ends the same way as yours, except that I am in your position. I have earplugs too but they don’t make earplugs string enough to stop you from hearing a screaming kid. You hear that deep into your core and there’s nothing you can do about it!

    Cheers from Canada!!

  33. Rachel says:

    Earplugs and a fan!

  34. lou says:

    YES – This is me! … was me … I, too am an earplug convert.

  35. Kelly McNamara says:

    I can’t do earplugs…something with hearing the sound of my own blood moving through my head keeps me awake! LOL

    BUT…I always sleep with a fan on for the white noise, and if I am trying to sleep when daddy is watching the kids (aka CIRCUS sounds coming through the bedroom door) I use a sound app on my phone or iPad. That way I can turn that noise up louder than they are!

  36. Simone says:

    Oh so true! Especially the adrenaline rush when you are awoken just as you drop off. I’ve never understood also why I keep the kids quiet as church mice whilst he’s napping, but when it’s my turn they sound like a zoo!

  37. Allison R says:

    Oh my Goodness…I find bath time hard too. No matter how I sneak away and how quiet I am, if I slip into the tub to read and relax for a few minutes my two boys are instantly in the bathroom stripping themselves. They even ask “Am I dirty Mommy?” Daddy wanders up once I have gotten out of the tub so they can get in and asks how he is suppose to keep them from coming upstairs…..*sigh* He works a couple of night shifts a week and always seems to be able to get a couple of hours of shut eye when he comes in the morning….I wonder how I always keep them downstairs or outside for this….Mommy Magic I guess. :0)

  38. Jennifer says:

    This is exactly what happens at my house, too! Daddy can fall asleep on the couch, right in the middle of all of commotion. I can’t sleep for five minutes in the bedroom, behind closed doors. I think it’s a Mommy thing – we are programmed to react everytime there’s some sort of emotion coming from our kids. That’s normally an amazing thing, but not when you’re exhausted. And if you’re a control freak like me, well, forget the nap.

  39. Amanda says:

    I haven’t found earplugs helpful, but a white noise machine (or the exhaust fan in your master bath) is a Godsend.

  40. I am a big fan of earplugs. As long as I know my husband is around with unplugged ears somewhere nearby I can pop those suckers in and hide under the covers and it’s awesome.

  41. Andrea says:

    Yep, earplugs AND white noise here. Had to start doing it at night too for awhile because the stupid baby monitor pretty much made me constantly paranoid and unable to relax.

  42. ST says:

    Uncle and Aunty visited this afternoon, so I took the opportunity to nap. Atilla insisted on joining me on the napping chair, despite the allure of playmates. Apparently he thinks something isn’t right when mummy closes her eyes.

  43. Brooke says:

    I definitely need earplugs. Now that the kids are old enough to not need me checking on them every time they make a noise (esp. if hubby’s up), I don’t lie down in my bed without them. Total lifesavers!

  44. Chi says:

    White noise machines are a savior, too! It might help to let hubby know to plan quieter activities. My DH (dear-husband) doesn’t usually remember to actually keep our child quiet (if possible) during my nap-turn.

    If you can sleep while wearing noise-canceling headphones, even better!

  45. coconuts says:

    We have a sound machine. Why not give up trying to give each other equal time. It’s obviously not fair. My husband can fall asleep anywhere, anytime within seconds. It can sometimes take me an hour or more to fall asleep even when everyone else is asleep. I think that after your husband’s one hour nap, he should give as much quiet, alone time as you need to finally get some peace, rest, sleep.

  46. Kim says:

    Yes earplugs – they are priceless when it comes to napping!!!

  47. Ariana says:

    I have a small box fan on my nightstand that I turn on when I take a nap, it drowns out all the noise and I sleep perfectly!

  48. Cat says:

    White noise, ear plugs… But there will inevitably be a “catastrophe” where only mama will do. Every freakin’ time.

    • Tina says:

      And when that doesn’t happen, the dog gets curious where you are and wanders into the bedroom to check on you with her wet cold nose. *how does she work that doorknob?

  49. Monika says:

    Isn’t that always the way it works out? Next time, take your nap first!

    Ear plugs are a great idea, I’m going to have to get some.

  50. Kate says:

    Ear plugs, plus a noise machine, and a husband that has to take the kids and LEAVE the house.

  51. Starle says:

    That hour that husband is napping? Use that hour to drink all of the wine that you can find! Even if you do manage to be woken up, you will no longer care!

  52. I’ve given up on naps. It consists of me attempting to sleep while Daddy brings baby into the room umteen times to ask questions or just say “hi.” “Hi, I’m sleeping- go away, grumble grumble.”

  53. Bex says:

    It’s a horrible mom nap curse. Happens every time. ANd here I am never even thinking about getting ear plugs. BIG reason why? Even after my husband naps, he can fall asleep again. NO STINKIN’ FAIR!!!!!!!!!!! He sleeps through any and every noise the kids make. Sometimes I really don’t like him, even though I love him dearly.

  54. Aubrey says:

    Earplugs are my salvation with 2 babies under 2 sleeping in the same room with me! And they are cheaper if you get them from the hardware store than if you go to the pharmacy. ๐Ÿ™‚

  55. Laura C. says:

    You know, I once read an article about naps. Apparently, your REM sleep kicks in about 45 mins in or so and the cycle lasts about another 45 mins or so. And if you’re awakened in the middle of your REM cycle, you actually feel more tired than when you fell asleep. Or something like that. I believe the article suggested that if you’re going to nap, make it either a short nap (less than 45 mins) or a long nap (longer than an hour and a half) so that you get a full REM cycle before you wake up. I wish I could remember the name of the article, because I’m not 100% positive that I’m not feeding you a load of crap right now.

  56. Krista says:

    What about sending the family away for a long walk or trip to the park? This helps me relax.

  57. Leslie says:

    I have a laptop (iPod or iPhone isn’t in the budget) and use a website with free white noise. It’s at simplynoise.com.

  58. Lisa says:

    Oh yes, I sympathize, if my husband watches the kids there seems to be a lot of crying, screaming and laughing. I don’t know why that happens.

    I have learned to use ear plugs and a white noise machine (right next to my head). Even then, sometimes they are still loud enough to wake me.

  59. Cindy says:

    Ugh. I’m a newish mom and am just learning how i lost my ability to nap. I used to pride myself on being a champion sleeper. i could literally take a sweater and fall asleep on a rock once upon a time.
    Not anymore. ๐Ÿ™
    But daddy over here can sleep through it!

  60. Meg says:

    Yes, earplugs are a MUST!!!! They feel a little funny, but the silence is AMAZING!

  61. Lauren says:

    Use a white noise machine, or even a fan. I don’t kids, but every noise bothers me too, so I’ve become addicted to a fan! This is how my mom avoided getting up with me when I was a baby and it was my dad’s turn. You won’t hear a THING!

  62. Melissa says:

    This blog post made it possible for my husband to understand why I don’t get out of bed first, and then go back for a nap. He can get up at 5:30, and wakes me a 7:00 to go back to sleep. He wanted to start alternating who wakes up, and thanks to you I don’t have to. He also almost peed himself laughing when he read this. So thank you thank you for this! I can sleep peacefully until 7am

  63. Kara says:

    If it weren’t for earplugs, I would never get any sleep. My husband snores and without earplugs, I have a sneaky suspicion I would look like the cryptkeeper from the old Tales from the Crypt show…just with better teeth.

  64. Anne says:

    Make him go OUT OF THE HOUSE its the only thing that works – then the kids wont call for you or snek up and wake you, and you wont be lying waiting for them to cry or laugh or move furniture around. When my kids were small I always took them out for walks when my husband had a nap – while he always stayed at home making it impossible for me to sleep, I dont know why I didnt insist on him going out, but I was probably too sleepy to take the argument…..

    • toni adams says:

      or better yet – get in the car, drive down the street, lock the doors, put the seat back and have your own cocoon of silence.

      • Tanya says:

        Yes! We keep our car in the garage and I’ve been tempted to sack out in there, but I love the “drive down the street” idea. Brilliant!

  65. Michelle says:

    This post is hilarious! I can sleep through Hubby’s snoring, thunderstorms and natural disasters. My kid makes a peep, down the hall in their bedroom with door closed, and *ping* wide awake!

  66. Tiffany says:

    SO TRUE! I never get a nap. Ever.

  67. Jennifer says:

    On the weekends we sometimes try to take a nap while my son takes his nap (he sleeps for 3-4 hours). Of course I say early on, “I am going to take a nap when DS goes down”. DS goes down and I happily get comfortable in my bed then her comes DH wanting to have “relations” and wonders why I give him a go to hell look.

  68. Amanda Reed says:

    I love my husband… I love my brothers….I love my male friends…. but for this exact reason, I hate them just a little bit. I can’t even help it.

  69. Laura says:

    i spend my entire nap time either playing on my phone or reading. Then I have 10 minutes, and it takes me 20 to fall asleep.

  70. toni adams says:

    I have no problems falling asleep… but seriously thinking the earplugs to block out the 5 and 3 year olds snarking at each other may be a really good idea… cause thats what does my head in. so from now on I may be walking round the house with a dreamy smile on my face while chaos reigns around me and not react….just like daddy. ohh thats a thought – maybe daddy’s been wearing earplugs all along.

  71. Jordan McBride says:

    That sounds about right….
    Even the Vegas part.

  72. Denise says:

    We call that feeling-worse-than-before-the-nap feeling “nap crap.”. Seems appropriate.

  73. Every single time. NO. EVERY SINGLE TIME. EVERY EVERY EVERY EVERY EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Begging myself to go to sleep in the thirteen seconds I have left to sleep has become a form of self-torture.

  74. Rachel Blackett says:

    OMGosh this describes me so well lol!! Some how hubby is able to sleep through anything, I don’t know how. He just rests on the couch and bam! is asleep, but with me even if I am snuggled up comfy in bed every little noise wakes me up. Gah!

  75. Danielle Bell says:

    I have a fan running in my room on low, all the time, as background noise and for air flow. The rare times I actually get to nap while someone is watching my 4 kids, I turn that sucker ALL the way up! Would quite probably block out a tank travelling beside my house! Makes my nap time so much nicer ๐Ÿ˜‰

  76. Adrienne says:

    I put music on, and turn it up a bit. A fan helps or the heater, depending on the weather, and an open window (we live next to a freeway and the airport!). I do wonder though, how I can keep the kids quiet while my hubby sleeps, but he can’t seem to keep the kids quiet for me. Though, half the time, what I actually hear is hubby yelling at the kids to be quiet when I hadn’t actually heard them making noise at all!

  77. Colleen says:

    Last week I had Strep throat. I lay curled on the bed, eyes closed, feverish. My five year old son (who also had Strep, who gave me the Strep as a matter of fact), comes barging in with, “MOM!!! YOU FELL ASLEEP!”
    No… no, I tried to fall asleep. I hug him and send him out the door. He is sick too, after all.
    Two minutes later. Eyes closed. Feverish. Curled on the bed.
    Hubby comes in with, “HEY! You need to sleep??”
    I say something rude about how he is asking the obvious, and what the heck? He leaves, offended.
    And goes into the next room of our 900 square foot house… and starts vacuuming.
    I never did get my nap.

    • Karrie says:

      I’m pretty sure a jury of your peers would acquit you of murder!

    • Kathleen says:

      And just wait until your hubby gets Strep! “Did you feel this bad? I don’t think your throat hurt as much, because this is unbearable! I need to sleep for the rest of the week!”

  78. Michele says:

    I have twins and they don’t fall asleep at the same time. My problem is that I can’t fall asleep until both of them are asleep. So my napping while they’re asleep gets even shorter and shorter. And being a single Mom it’s not too often somebody comes over and offers to let me take a nap.

  79. Megan Griffith says:

    When I am extremely tired or sick, everyone else in the house gets Benadryl…..even the dog. They sleep like a bunch of rocks leaving me free to drink martinis….er, um, I mean nap…

  80. Ocean Wave app on my iPhone works wonders. I turn it up so loud you’d think I was on board the Titanic during The Perfect Storm. So long as I don’t pee myself while dreaming it really blocks everything else out. Try it!

  81. Heidi B says:

    This is exactly why I gave up on naps! My husband is a master napper and it used to make me so mad. Now we have a great system. On weekends I get to sleep in while he manages the chaos. Around mid morning/early afternoon he gets to take his nap. Now nobody gets mad over the other’s chance to sleep ๐Ÿ˜€

  82. Tina says:

    My issue now that the kids are older its one of two things… The dog comes in to sleep with me.. so there I am sleeping when I am suddenly awaken by the dog who is on my legs jumping up cause her farts scared her awake. Really?? Then get down and sleep on the floor.. The second thing is my coming out to 3 teens cleaning up water from washing machine/dishwasher/rug cleaner cause someone put in too much soap or one of the cats decided it was hair ball time. Was anyone going to wake me up and let me know there was an issue (okay beside the hair ball..) they all look at each other and go “I wasn’t going to go in there and wake her” LOL

  83. Melanie G says:

    my husband and our 3 dogs snore loudly, so i finally tried ear plugs & they saved my marriage. i usually turn on a fan & a sound machine too just to be safe. the added bonus is I can’t hear when my toddler wakes in the middle of the night so daddy ends up getting up with her.

  84. Sarah says:

    It amazes me that my fiancee can sleep on the couch while the 4yr old plays on the floor next to the couch. Our son will be screaming and yelling and crashing his cars and toys together and knocking down block towers and my fiancee will just sleep through it. I hear our son sneeze in the middle of the night and I’m awake. LOL

  85. Kimberly says:

    Hey, I thought this only happened at my house! And we also set a timer! I never thought of earplugs…but I do know that counting down from 600 gets me to sleep every time! But you have to count down, not up…up doesn’t work.

  86. Amanda N. says:

    I feel you. Unless my husband takes the toddler out of the house, I’m not going to nap. :-/

  87. Ann Potter says:

    Another good idea is that crappy papa can take the kids for a nice walk/drive to a local park, play ground, or other free place – ikea has a nice ball area bigger kids can play in. That way you have a lovely quite house to sleep in this is the only thing that worked for me unless I napped when the baby did.

  88. Angel says:

    Hmmmm…I just turn off my hearing aids. This works for when all 5 kids are crying and having tantrums at the same time, too.

  89. Fatmata says:

    I go to my daughter’s room and pull down the shades, turn her humidifier on, shot the door and have husband control noise. If I wake up before the agreed time due to their fault, I start all over again!

  90. Nanasha says:

    My husband has to sleep at night because he works the graveyard shift. We also only have a one bedroom apartment with paper thin walls. So how do we manage? An air circulating fan. We leave it on for the whole time he’s sleeping. Not only is it great “white noise” but it literally creates a sound barrier between both rooms. Even with the TV on fairly loud, he can’t even hear it in the bedroom if the door is closed.

    I highly recommend getting one of the “cyclone” fans- they’re maybe 40 bucks and you’ll love it forever. ๐Ÿ™‚

  91. Fatmata says:

    I go to my daughter’s room and pull down the shades, turn her humidifier on, shut the door and have husband control noise. If I wake up before the agreed time due to their fault, I start all over again!

  92. Pamela says:

    I have a stash of earplugs… just in case they stop making them! AND a really good sleep mask.

    TOTALLY relate to this story. I think my husband actually gets 59.9 minutes. And I too convince myself that I’m just “recharging my battery” with rest. Sometimes I have to give myself this talk in the middle of the night!

  93. Jessica says:

    I actually had a minor meltdown last weekend over this same scenario. He manages a nice nap most weekends and my attempts are always just like yours! Somehow you make it sound funny though! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  94. I sleep with ear plugs no matter what! naps, bedtime, husband snoring, sleeping by myself, in the hospital with a newborn baby. i’m addicted, i cant sleep without them! ps – you can hear a newborn baby with ear plugs, there is no way to sleep through that! lol!

  95. Aimee says:

    My husband does this. Which is why it is mandatory that both husband and baby leave the house for my nap. Period.

  96. Gia Arnold says:

    Love it, My husband can fall asleep within seconds, it takes me at least an hour to fall asleep. Therefore I never nap.. Not even being 5 months pregnant with baby #3 and chasing a preschooler and toddler around!

  97. Lynn Cox says:

    Love the fan/ear plug method too! At night I use the one earplug method, put my other ear on the pillow until I’m asleep… that one’s to dull the Hub’s snores and still be able to hear down the hall if someone cries. I used to nap with the kiddies actually climbing on me out of sheer desperation. Hubby wasn’t really intuitive. I had to demand my turn.

  98. Vanessa Honzatko says:

    earplugs pfff not strong enough! need to download some white noise (yes I mean the stuff used for babies) chuck it on your ithing put your earplugs in and crank it!!!! you’ll be asleep in minutes, nothing is getting past that sound. I like mine with raindrops. cosy.

  99. EmpressMomma says:

    This very well may be the truest post I’ve ever read!! Seriously, it’s no fair how men can sleep through a train crashing in the living room, but we mommas wake if the kid farts in her sleep!

  100. cathy says:

    My hubby’s rule is “if Mommy’s trying to nap, NOBODY disturbes her.” It’s his own rule. I have the same issue as you otherwise, so his 1/2-hour nap might just well equal him tending to the kids for 3 hours so that I get 1/2-hour of nap as well. He’s good with it. It was his rule. Goes along with his adage that “If Mommy ain’t happy, ain’t NOBODY happy.” … Mom’s have gotta look after themselves FIRST before they can look after the rest of the family. Guaranteed.

  101. LeahM says:

    Noise machine helps a little. Husband taking kids outside helps A LOT.

  102. Katie says:

    Why can guys fall asleep so quickly!!?? I want to slap my husband for that ability.

  103. Nicole says:

    Anytime I nap when daddy is watching the crazy 3 yr old, I turn a big box fan on high and sit it right beside the bed…it drowns out everything!

  104. Mercy says:

    I get this. My hubby can nap any time, any place – he will be asleep in seconds. Even if I doze off quickly, something will always wake me up. For this reason I make sure my kids are napping before I do.

  105. Deborah says:

    we have done something similar. my husband is oblivious. here’s my solution: get in the car, lay the seat back & take your nap there.

  106. Natalie B says:

    yes, earplugs! they are my bedside staple… I used them all the time ๐Ÿ˜€

  107. Ahhh, this is so true! My husband can take a nap on the floor with the kids playing all around him. I try to take a nap in the bedroom or on the sofa and I can’t do it – it’s too noisy or my mind just won’t shut off.

  108. Becky says:

    We have done this before. During my hour I play, or do whatever my kids want to do. I feel really bad if I don’t think they are getting stimulated no matter how tired I am. Even though it is totally their fault! ; ) My hubby usually lays on the couch and has them watch tv. So then I just lay in bed feeling guilty because one hour of no crafts, songs, or pretend restaurant will surely be detrimental to them…stupid guilt. Why did no one tell me about the irrational things I would feel guilty about once I became a mom!?!?

  109. Jolleen says:

    I have a Costco size container of ear plugs on my night stand =D Good luck next nap!

  110. Jennifer J says:

    As soon as I had one who was semi-capable of watching the children, I made sure I got my nap. In the beginning, the rules were: don’t answer the door or the phone, don’t wake me up unless someone is bleeding and you can’t make it stop, or the house is on fire. Later, when some of them were old enough to play outside when I napped, the first rule got changed to: don’t wake me up unless the police are at the door. That happened a couple times. But, I have been raising children for more than 30 years, and I still have two at home.

  111. Sara says:

    this is so my life!!! The only way to take a nap is to get husband to take kids out of the house!!!!

  112. abracadabra says:

    One of my favorite things about the weekend is family nap time. If mama needs a nap, every one is going get one — in their own beds ;). It is something I learned from my parents, they say one of the best things they do for their marriage is get enough rest. We had mandatory weekend naps until I was at least 8 or 9 even though I had teen siblings that could have been enlisted to babysit (I remember “sneaking” books — they knew what I was doing, they didn’t care as long as I was quite and in my bed).

    I admit, I am lucky. I have a 7yo who looks forward to being able to take naps on the weekend and a 5yo who doesn’t but if you make him lay still long enough will usually conk out for ~2hrs and still go to bed on time. I don’t know what I would do if I had one of those kids who stopped napping early.

    I read somewhere the hypothesis that observant Jews have such a low divorce rate even compared to observant couples of other faiths because keeping the Sabbath usually involves everyone taking a nap because there is nothing else to do. This results in everyone being better rested and consequently happier AND there is at minimum a weekly opportunity for (unhurried) physical intimacy. I think it is was a tongue-and-cheek but as someone from a family of people who are very sensitive to sleep deprivation, I buy it.

  113. Stefanie says:

    You missed the first few slides of how Crappy mom works hard keeping the boys entertained quietly while Crappy papa naps. Why the same isn’t reciprocated is beyond me!

  114. Jessica says:

    This is my life exactly! My husband and I are both laughing hysterically at this post!

  115. Karrie says:

    The WORST fights I have ever had with my husband were about his sleeping vs. my sleeping. It’s a wonder we made it thru those years.
    Once the younger child turned 4, my life got much MUCH easier.
    What we do now is I sleep in for a few hours, and husband takes a nap after lunch since he can also do the sleep-in-five-seconds thing!

    Hang in there, Amber!

  116. katef4 says:

    I’ve been sleeping with earplugs since the second night I ever spent with my husband, when we were dating. I don’t deal with nighttime noise! our son still co-sleeps with us so I’m able to be aware of his movements without having to hear my husband’s clicking at nighttime. As for naps, with or without earplugs I am watching the clock. Nightmare.

  117. roma mollins says:

    I grew up in the age of guilt…. If I used ear plugs I would miss an emergency call- a need to go to emerg- a request for something that they just can’t live without…. After 33 years of marriage- I have NEVER napped- rarely slept- and with 2 of the 3 angels having moved out and with families of their own- the guilt it so big that I feel the need to be oncall 24/7…. cause you never know who will need you…. and they quite often do…. So glad that I was adhd- long before it was known- and that I learned to channel all that energy into our kids/grandkids…. and I don’t regret a minute- couldn’t cause I would feel guilty!!HAHA

  118. Eye balls hanging out.... says:

    I tried to get a few zzzzs on the couch to find my little one placing on me gifts of food, drink, the remote and finally the broom….

    So giving. Just want the gift of sleep…..

  119. Vanessa S. says:

    I say, next time use ear plugs and have papa take boys out to the park for an hour plus ๐Ÿ™‚

  120. Dawn says:

    Oh so true! Why do men have such an amazing ability to sleep and just shut off the world???

  121. Heather says:

    This is exactly my experience too, which is why I want to punch people when they say ‘just sleep when the baby sleeps…’ when that baby is not your first child. I have totally given up on naps at this point.

  122. Heather S says:

    I completely understand this post. Not only does this seem to apply when I’m sleeping, it also applies when I’m working. I work evenings at home for a hotel call center and constantly have interruptions and noise and it doesn’t seem as if Daddy is at all proactive about curtailing it so I can concentrate. plus I feel a little guilty about not being in there to step in and help.

  123. Lizzie says:

    gosh, I hate that : when you go for a snooze but end up being more tired than ever !!! ><
    Or when I put bubba in bed….then after 1h, I decide to nap (my mistake)…but bubba must feel it (I think he is an alien to be honnest, how does he know…) and wake up EXACTLY when I'm all cosy up and ready to sleep ! grrrrr

  124. Rachel says:

    This is so true! I’ve taken to having a long bath instead of trying to get to sleep. If I leave a tap dribbling and put my ears under the water I can barely hear the screams, yells and crashes from downstairs, or even the banging on the door. Much more restful!

  125. IDS says:

    you need to send Crappy Dad with Crappy children out – for a walk or to a shop, just out of the house, so there’s no noise
    Our 4 year old got a tablet thingy for his birthday, so now when it’s time to put the baby (erm, 21 months old) for a nap, I can nap with him, while the older one is busy on his little computer.

  126. Hope says:

    Make them leave the house…

  127. Anita says:

    AARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! YES, YES, YES!
    I was allocated my FIRST sleep in, in THREE years of parenting two kiddies… I hear Master 1 cry, I nudge husband… he groans and rolls out of bed – Then I hear Master 3 call out… followed by shenanigans a bit of squeeling etc etc… then silence OH NO! Silence is NEVER good.
    THEN… I hear tip toes… and the doona ruffle… then a big wet sloppy kiss, and a whisper ‘wake up, mummy. It’s time to get up.’
    I turned the telly on for him and rolled over and buried myself in my pillow- half an hour later when I resided in the fact that I was NOT getting a sleep in… I went out to see Master 1 and Husband chowing down on a yummy breakfast… the conversation went like this…
    ‘Did you not WONDER where Master three was?’
    ‘Yeah, I thought he was in his room pulling the clothes out of his drawers.’
    ‘Oh, Right… so … that’s ok????’ ***cranky face***

  128. Ellie says:

    Sadly, very true! I was given a lot of ‘naps’ when my babies were tiny – my parents or husband would take the baby away (hooray!) and I’d crawl into bed and try to make up for being awake all night. I could never, ever relax enough to sleep. Either I’d hear the baby crying downstairs and my boobs would wake me up, or I’d lie there trying to turn my brain off. In the end, I accepted that lying down and resting was going to have to do. My nighttime sleep is far shallower since having children, too. Men just don’t seem to have this problem.

  129. TBUlrich says:

    My sound machine is my life. Only way I get to sleep on my sleep-in mornings.

  130. Jennifer says:

    We do this too. Ear plugs donโ€™t work for me they just muffle the noise. I can hear my son crying with the door shut and ear plugs in and fan on. I wish I knew what kind would actually cancel out the noise.

  131. Julie F. says:

    What is it with men? We don’t take naps, but my husband and I take turns getting up with our 5 year old daughter on the weekends. When it’s his turn to sleep in I always make sure the rest of the house is quiet so we don’t disturb him. When it’s my turn to sleep in I can actually hear him encouraging our daughter and dog to make as much noise as possible. Sometimes I think he’s just inconsiderate and doesn’t even think about it and other times I think he purposely has them make noise because he wants me to get up. It’s not as much of a big deal if they’re making noise at 9:30 as it is if they’re making noise at 7:00 or 7:30. Sometimes I think I want to go away by myself for a weekend and get some good rest, but it would probably be too quiet. ๐Ÿ™‚

  132. Melanie says:

    Amber, this usually happens to us the other way around. My daughter will good and stay quiet with DH while I sleep (and boy, do I sleep soundly!). But when he tries to nap, she whines loudly, “where’d Daddy go? Let’s find Daddd-yyyy!”

    Poor DH never gets a break. ๐Ÿ™‚

  133. Kate says:

    Whenever I want to nap, I turn on my hynpobirthing CD from when I was pregnant. Even though it’s meant to help me relax during labor, it still works to help me fall asleep!

    Kate
    http://www.justdelivered.net

  134. Jenn D. says:

    I bought a pair of SleepPhones so I could drown out noises like my children, my husband’s snoring, etc. I LOVE them! Wish I had bought a pair years ago. http://www.sleepphones.com

  135. Mary-Michael says:

    I laughed when I read this because I go through the same thing! And, yes, ear plugs are perfect for this situation.

  136. I use earplugs too! We trade off sleeping in. I get saturday mornings, he gets sunday mornings. Last weekend I didn’t get out of bed until 10:30am!!! That hasn’t happened since I conceived the first crappy baby 6 years ago! (I didn’t sleep the whole time, because of the crashes and running feet above me, but I did rest!)

  137. Loved this post because you are totally spot on! The Daddies and the mini people have apparently formed an alliance to see how long we can go on little sleep!

    It drives me nuts that darling daddy can always sleep the most time and sleep through virtually anything! I unfortunately suffer from being a light sleeper which was a benefit for nighttime nursing but not so much to being able to nap.

    • Farley says:

      I’m convinced that becoming a Mommy makes you a light sleeper. That little human DEPENDS on YOU for LIFE ITSELF! This is WAR, ladies, and we intend to win it. Later on, when you are pretty sure that little human will not quit breathing if you get into a deep sleep and don’t awake at his every snort, his insatiable curiousity and questions and changes of thought will render you ADD. I’m a grandmother, now and I’m pretty sure these changes are permanent. Enjoy!

  138. Jenny Caparos says:

    Lucky for me, I wear hearing aids! (It’s not often that I actually say that.) I can just take them out, and VOILA! Silence!

  139. Alison says:

    This may be the funniest thing I have ever read. This is the exact thing that happens to me every time I try to take a nap, and my husband doesn’t explain why I am “still” tired after I got my “nap.” I’m glad I am not alone!

  140. I put a pillow over my head. I figure if a sound can make it thru that AND a closed door, I probably should get up to see what happened. Love naps!!

  141. Christy says:

    Earplugs are great. However, the only real method that works is for hubby to take the boys on a very, very long walk. Or to grandma’s house.

  142. Jen says:

    why don’t you and Crappy Papa just take a nap when BOTH kids are sleeping, at the same time??

    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
    like THAT ever happens!

  143. Nikky44 says:

    This is So funny, but so true!! Happens all the time

  144. Farley says:

    I once threatened to go to a hotel for the night because I could not even remember what day it was (or was it night?) I was so tired. I also dragged a mattress downstairs to the dining room to get as far from the noise as possible – along with earplugs, a fan, and magnesium and calcium to help me sleep. Pretty desperate.

  145. Ambria says:

    You know what a life saver is? A fan. A loud noisy fan drowns out pretty much everything. I can hardly sleep without it anymore. It’s awesome.

    • Cindy says:

      We use fans too. But sometimes, there’s that noise that blasts through it. But they do work mostly, don’t they?

  146. Tiny says:

    Oh My God, girl … i was laughing so hard i was crying … this is SO relatable. We trade naps, i go first since once i’m up, i’m up. Hubby can sleep through a friggin’ 7.2 earthquake!

  147. Danielle says:

    Why oh why have I not thought of earplugs before?! Why!! My son is almost 2 and I could have had many wonderful naps with ear plugs. In my house it never fails that I will hear my son cry/scream/bang on stuff when I am trying to nap. It just gets much louder when my husband is in charge. Hmm…

  148. Cindy says:

    I. CAN’T. STOP. LAUGHING!!!
    Its so true. I try a pillow over my head too. Nope.
    hahahahahahaha! Thank you for making me laugh over a situation I get livid about.

  149. Liz says:

    SO right on… and so my reality right now. I hand the kids over to my husband (6 months and 3 years) and can only sleep with the earplugs or fan and pillow over my head… SO not like me, but desperate times… Thanks for helping me feel less nuts.

  150. Sandi says:

    I was laughing so hard through this post–this is my husband and I exactly! He falls asleep so fast and doesn’t wake up for anything. I not only wake up for every noise (with the accompanying adrenaline rush) but it takes me a while to shut down my brain enough to fall asleep in the first place. I usually get about 20 minutes of sleep in an hour nap.

  151. Michelle watts says:

    I’m a die hard ear plug user too. Add a sleep mask for day time naps and your all set!

  152. Wow! That sounds like when I tried to nap this weekend!!!!

  153. Jodi says:

    Oh the need for sleep is so strong in me. Today after everyone was fed dinner I CRASHED on the bed nothing, and I mean nothing was going to bother me. I slept through two episodes of Mythbusters. 1 was demolition derby and not sure what the 2nd was cause I was to far gone into blissful slumber. It didn’t matter that I was sleeping on the other side of the room while DH and my 3 DC were wowing and cooling and laughing or that my LO came up to me to show me she had something she prolly shouldn’t have had. I told her that’s nice dear now run along. Back out in seconds. Mythbusters over, “Mommy get up its time to go to bed”. Oh the stories I could tell of sleep deprivation and being disturbed to the point of tears. Falling asleep at work(not a good idea), on the bus back and forth to said work. Still having work even though nodding off while putting in data makes for some quick corrections later. The snoring in the break room while the social workers laugh every time there is a loud snort. Getting better at staying awake, but it is difficult at times. Ahhh sweet dreams everyone. Good night.

  154. Back out in seconds.

  155. hrl says:

    Ugh, this is exactly how my naps go, except I have a 5 month old and she wails and can’t ignore her.

  156. Liz says:

    i heart earplugs….they shut out hubby’s snoring at night, household sounds during naps. Mack’s brand or Hearos brand are my favorites.

  157. lawahine says:

    I don’t nap. I’ve learned this is not a thing I do any more after turning 26. What is up with that?? When I was in my first trimester I did nap but it was more like I was asleep for three months with being awake in between.

    ANYWAY! Earplugs make a whooshing sound in my brain that IS crazy LOUD. They also make me afraid of not being able to hear someone breaking into my house to stab me. Being tired is better for me.